Day1LetsGo

HEY GUYS!
I missed posting yesterday. I don't have the internet at my house, so, I have to come into work (my office). Praise the lord that I don't work the weekends! Cuban, you're stressing me out! Haha. Listen, I'm hard wired, and love my energy. The thought of going a day without my Suboxone was (and still is NUTS). But I'm on day 3, and it's too late to turn back now.
THE END OF DAY 1 was strait up, ******. Most people say that the don't get hit until day 2 or 3, but like I said, I'm a doper, through and through. I need something! I had nothing to fall back on, and, was horrified when my withdrawal symptoms started picking up. I'd like to correct my night before posting by saying I had 1mg on my last dose, giving me 4mg total for the day (my average). I was fading on Day 1 quickly, and, I actually scored 2 films (8mg each) around 9:00pm, 24 hours in. I didn't touch them, but the thought of being able to tap out, throuw in the towel, surrender, etc., if I wanted to eased my mind. I had stocked up on supplies, which I believe helped me greatly.
BEFORE I GO TO DAY 2, this is what I have: Trazadone for sleep, Vistiril to calm my crawling skin, and creatine to take along with lots of water. To eat, I have cereal, bananas, milk, bottled water and Powrade. I've also started taking B12, Vitamin C, and a Multi-Vitamin.
DAY 2 was more physical than Day 1, yet, I was a little stronger mentally. It was Saturday, so, no work. I made it out of the house twice- Once to try my best to jog, which was quite good. It helped me feel better despite me being EXHAUSTED. I slept like ****, but with the Trazadone, I actually managed to get about 5 hours off and on. I went over to my Parents house to watch the last 10 minutes of a football game. Let me remind you, I had NO ENERGY. So, I bought a coffee from McDonalds. BIG MISTAKE. That thing gave me goose bumps, made me yawn, then my skin started to crawl, and I had some minor jolts of unintentional body movements. One of the band members of the opposing team started to cry when our team whooped theirs, and, despite being happy, the sight of seeing her cry made my have to try like hell to fight my own tears back. I made it home after the game, took a hot shower, took 1 vistiril and 1 trazadone, and got some better sleep than I thought I would.
TODAY IS DAY 3. I have a few minutes out of every few hours where I feel like normal. Before I know it, the withdrawals come back and slap the hell out of me. I've spent the last few days in bed. The thought of returning to work tomorrow, sitting at this desk, makes me even sicker (I know that's not a word, but, I don't care right now, lol). I'm hungry, but don't have the energy to put food in my mouth. Tonight feels like sleep may be a little harder to come by. I've smoked several cigarettes, but, don't know why- They actually make me feel worse.
I KNOW THIS ALL SEEMS HORRIBLE, but, put in your earphones, play some sweet music, and masturbate as aften as you can. That may sound crazy, even mentioning it I feel crazy, but, it really works magic. I'm going to make it. 9:00pm tonight will actually still only be day 3, but I will have passed the 72 hour mark, and be starting Day 4. I'll still have to fight off the night, though. I'm looking at it like this- If you have cancer, you need treatment to cook out the cancer, if you have Hepatitis, you need treatment to cook out the discease. We have problems with addiction, and we'll have to cook out the demons that have plagued us. LET'S GO!
*Sorry if there's things spelled incorrectly, I'm way to tired to proof read.