Finding my way
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2012
Posts: 2
Finding my way
Hi everyone
Feeling very grateful that a site such as this exists. I landed on it by searching the web for some inspiration related to recovery/healing. 52 yr old male.
I have been a regular wine drinker for about 30 years, almost every day as part of what I always considered a dinner celebration. I live to eat and not vice versa. Wine has always been part of the social fabric of dinner in my family and that event could last several hours on any given night. Of course dependance and tolerance crept up on me and today, find myself consuming maybe twice the recommended allowances, which adds up to just under one bottle. From a medical perspective, all lab numbers are good but an unrelated abdominal ultrasound revealed a fatty liver, most likely alcohol induced.From a social perspective, all is good too, ie married to the same person almost 30 yrs and job/career ok. I have never gone "overboard" creating situations I later regretted.
My biggest fear right now is wondering how much damage I have done. Some MDs outright disapprove of any alcohol, while others approve social drinking, even if pushing the enevelope a bit. So, I am having an "Oh Sh*t" moment now, shaking my head and wondering how I could have gotten where I am. That fatty liver ultrasound scared the you know what out of me!
I guess I would simply like to read some of your thoughts. Am I over reacting and panicking or do I need an urgent wake up call to avoid the morgue in the short term. My preference would be to taper and maintain a social approach that keeps me within "allowable" limits. I think I can do it. I suppose my story is not one of a kind. Would love to read about anyone who has been down this trail before and what they have done to come to a positive resolution.
A recovery of some kind is in the making; I feel the winds of change blowing stronger every day.
Thanks to all in advance who take the time to respond
Feeling very grateful that a site such as this exists. I landed on it by searching the web for some inspiration related to recovery/healing. 52 yr old male.
I have been a regular wine drinker for about 30 years, almost every day as part of what I always considered a dinner celebration. I live to eat and not vice versa. Wine has always been part of the social fabric of dinner in my family and that event could last several hours on any given night. Of course dependance and tolerance crept up on me and today, find myself consuming maybe twice the recommended allowances, which adds up to just under one bottle. From a medical perspective, all lab numbers are good but an unrelated abdominal ultrasound revealed a fatty liver, most likely alcohol induced.From a social perspective, all is good too, ie married to the same person almost 30 yrs and job/career ok. I have never gone "overboard" creating situations I later regretted.
My biggest fear right now is wondering how much damage I have done. Some MDs outright disapprove of any alcohol, while others approve social drinking, even if pushing the enevelope a bit. So, I am having an "Oh Sh*t" moment now, shaking my head and wondering how I could have gotten where I am. That fatty liver ultrasound scared the you know what out of me!
I guess I would simply like to read some of your thoughts. Am I over reacting and panicking or do I need an urgent wake up call to avoid the morgue in the short term. My preference would be to taper and maintain a social approach that keeps me within "allowable" limits. I think I can do it. I suppose my story is not one of a kind. Would love to read about anyone who has been down this trail before and what they have done to come to a positive resolution.
A recovery of some kind is in the making; I feel the winds of change blowing stronger every day.
Thanks to all in advance who take the time to respond
Member
Join Date: Sep 2011
Posts: 1,138
Hey GGT, welcome to SR. You'll find lots of good support here.
Even if moderation is your ultimate goal, many people would suggest quitting drinking altogether for between 30 and 90 days. This will give you a chance to observe how dependent on alcohol you may have become. If you find 30 (or 90) days difficult, then you might want to consider quitting altogether.
Another thing I have read recently is that more and more doctors are pushing at least 3 days off of drinking per week in order to maintain a more healthy liver. Drinking daily, even within prescribed limits, is damaging to your health.
I'm sure others will come along with some additional advice soon. Welcome!
Even if moderation is your ultimate goal, many people would suggest quitting drinking altogether for between 30 and 90 days. This will give you a chance to observe how dependent on alcohol you may have become. If you find 30 (or 90) days difficult, then you might want to consider quitting altogether.
Another thing I have read recently is that more and more doctors are pushing at least 3 days off of drinking per week in order to maintain a more healthy liver. Drinking daily, even within prescribed limits, is damaging to your health.
I'm sure others will come along with some additional advice soon. Welcome!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2010
Posts: 249
There are those who can use in moderation without complications, and there are those who cannot, or at least would do better to not use at all. If you're concerned about your use, the advice you were just given is perfect. Quit for three months. See how you feel, and where you're at at the end of that period. That will allow you perspective on where you are.
Grateful to be free
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Arizona
Posts: 3,680
For a whole lot of reasons, try, as suggested above, to go without for 90 days. See how you feel. Have the dr take another look after time sans wine. Put the wine money in a jar for an alternate but enjoyable activity.
As I've aged I notice my tastes change, my sensibilities, my thinking that if some is good, more is better. I eat a creme puff and think the experience wasn't worth the calories. Maybe I wolfed it down too fast, or rather than wait and have it in a pleasant atmosphere, gobbled it in the car.
Booze too. etc etc.
From your description of your use, developing tolerance, needing MORE..it would seem that you are not just enjoying the wine as an accompaniment to a fine meal, but for some other effect or reason. Possibly worth taking another look at that.
If drinking is affecting our lives negativly, then it's probably best to stop, we can do a lot of health and life by taking time working out our odds, hedging our bets etc.
As I've aged I notice my tastes change, my sensibilities, my thinking that if some is good, more is better. I eat a creme puff and think the experience wasn't worth the calories. Maybe I wolfed it down too fast, or rather than wait and have it in a pleasant atmosphere, gobbled it in the car.
Booze too. etc etc.
From your description of your use, developing tolerance, needing MORE..it would seem that you are not just enjoying the wine as an accompaniment to a fine meal, but for some other effect or reason. Possibly worth taking another look at that.
If drinking is affecting our lives negativly, then it's probably best to stop, we can do a lot of health and life by taking time working out our odds, hedging our bets etc.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Midwest
Posts: 8,336
Welcome to SR. Sounds like you're ready to consider change as a result of this health scare. I haven't been on SR too long, but have noticed that moderated drinking rarely works. What is your doctor who ordered these tests telling you?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2012
Posts: 2
Thanks to all who took the time to write. Interetsingly the approach I wanted to adopt is the one many of you suggested ie an abstinence trial and then re-asess. I love the mix of wine and food and would hate to have to forever give it up because of an inability to be reasonable with consumption. But then again, sobriety might taste even better, so in the meantime I will continue to read others' stories here to remain inspired. An improved ultrasound in 90 days might also help me realize I just missed a very close call!
Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: UK
Posts: 1,145
Wine was my drink of choice also, ggt. I romanticised it - bought good, expensive wine and drank it with good, expensive food. I believed that what I was doing was very civilised and because it was good stuff and not cheap, of course I didn't have a problem with alcohol. I wasn't drinking hard stuff straight or the cheapest, strongest beer you could find. But alcohol is alcohol, your body doesn't distinguish between what year it is from, what vineyard. Now I see it as what it really is... poison.
The thought of giving up my dinner parties and all that goes along with them was terrifying for me at first, too. I thought that if I didn't drink good wine, I couldn't have good fun. I would be missing out. The beef wouldn't taste as good without the wine. The conversation wouldn't flow so freely without it, either. Now I've realised that all of those things were nonsense... I actually have dinner parties focussed on food now, rather than alcohol... and the food tastes better, and my conversation is FAR better, I believe!
Give the 90 days a try - you might find that giving up the wine and food combination forever appeals to you after it. There are many, many benefits!
All the best to you.
The thought of giving up my dinner parties and all that goes along with them was terrifying for me at first, too. I thought that if I didn't drink good wine, I couldn't have good fun. I would be missing out. The beef wouldn't taste as good without the wine. The conversation wouldn't flow so freely without it, either. Now I've realised that all of those things were nonsense... I actually have dinner parties focussed on food now, rather than alcohol... and the food tastes better, and my conversation is FAR better, I believe!
I love the mix of wine and food and would hate to have to forever give it up because of an inability to be reasonable with consumption.
All the best to you.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 754
Welcome ggt. Like you I love wine, wine tasting, wine paring, visits to vineyards, etc. I can’t even put that love in past tense. But, I have had to walk away from it. I hope to admire it from afar, knowing that for some people it is good and fine. But it is NOT good and fine for me. It is my cross to bear. But I don’t walk alone! SR is great – and so is prayer.
Keep reading and posting!
Keep reading and posting!
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
