Newbie " Dry Drunk "
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2012
Location: ca
Posts: 11
Newbie " Dry Drunk "
Hi I'm here to hopefully get some advice & support. I am separated from my husband of 15yrs .Recently he said he wasn't coming home, & that he wanted a divorce. He has not been going to AA for yrs. He explained to me what a Dry Drunk was years ago. When he left I started to go to Al Anon in desperation. I wish I had gone long ago. I now know why we had so many problems. Not to say that all our problems were because of alcohol. He says he does not want to be accountable to any one. We do have a daughter together. Over the yrs we had many financial problems. I wish I knew more about this. DD. If anyone can give me some insight on it I would appreciate it. I still love him very much and want to get our family back . Thanks B.
peaceful seabird
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: floating
Posts: 4,822
Welcome to the SR family!
I'm glad you found us, but sorry about the reason that brought you here. ((Hugs)) to you as you deal with you AH (Alcoholic Husbands) decision.
I am glad to read that you are attending alanon meetings. They have been very helpful for me.
Please make yourself at home by reading and posting as much as needed. We are here to support you.
I don't have a magic solution to getting your family back. I wish I had words that would have convinced my AH to not throw away a life of committment and responsibility. I couldn't find the words then and I don't know any now. Mine chose to continue his active addiction to alcohol.
I do know what I did to help me find answers. I consulted with a couple lawyers to find out what my legal options were to protect myself and our children. Consulting with a lawyer (most consultations are free) doesn't mean committment to divorce, but it meant a way to learn what my rights were in my community in my situation. That helped ease my mind about our future.
I also attended Alanon, read/posted here at SR and started reading self-improvement books to help myself heal.
Sending you encouragement and support as you find your way.
I'm glad you found us, but sorry about the reason that brought you here. ((Hugs)) to you as you deal with you AH (Alcoholic Husbands) decision.
I am glad to read that you are attending alanon meetings. They have been very helpful for me.
Please make yourself at home by reading and posting as much as needed. We are here to support you.
I don't have a magic solution to getting your family back. I wish I had words that would have convinced my AH to not throw away a life of committment and responsibility. I couldn't find the words then and I don't know any now. Mine chose to continue his active addiction to alcohol.
I do know what I did to help me find answers. I consulted with a couple lawyers to find out what my legal options were to protect myself and our children. Consulting with a lawyer (most consultations are free) doesn't mean committment to divorce, but it meant a way to learn what my rights were in my community in my situation. That helped ease my mind about our future.
I also attended Alanon, read/posted here at SR and started reading self-improvement books to help myself heal.
Sending you encouragement and support as you find your way.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2007
Posts: 1,175
Hi, Beckylee,
My RAH is almost 20 months sober.
HE is def dry drunk.
The symptoms are kind of funny, as they can read as the symptoms of a plain old horses a**, LOL...but, even though this link is a bit obscure, it does the best I've seen to describe what can happen when a person gets physically sober, but does not do the emotional and psychological, and spiritual work necessary to gain true happiness.
Mine also had underlying mental instability issues, most likely looking at bi polar or a different cluster of personality disorders (NPD, Borderline, etc. )
This is definitely worth a read:
Dry Drunk Syndrome
One thing I have learned, though, just like with active drinking, they are not really going to see this stuff if they dont want to.
Meetings help my RAH if he goes. He is sporadic.
Right now, he is kind of an erratic mess.
We also have one child, a 7 yr old son.
Keep posting and welcome!
Dry Drunk Syndrome
My RAH is almost 20 months sober.
HE is def dry drunk.
The symptoms are kind of funny, as they can read as the symptoms of a plain old horses a**, LOL...but, even though this link is a bit obscure, it does the best I've seen to describe what can happen when a person gets physically sober, but does not do the emotional and psychological, and spiritual work necessary to gain true happiness.
Mine also had underlying mental instability issues, most likely looking at bi polar or a different cluster of personality disorders (NPD, Borderline, etc. )
This is definitely worth a read:
Dry Drunk Syndrome
One thing I have learned, though, just like with active drinking, they are not really going to see this stuff if they dont want to.
Meetings help my RAH if he goes. He is sporadic.
Right now, he is kind of an erratic mess.
We also have one child, a 7 yr old son.
Keep posting and welcome!
Dry Drunk Syndrome
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