I know they say you can't run from your problems...
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Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: little rock, ar
Posts: 151
I know they say you can't run from your problems...
but that does not mean that you should be throwing BBQ's and inving them over either lol
I've been clean for a while now. about a year and a half. I've moved from my home city and moved to Kentucky a bout a year ago, lexington to be specific. I'm doing pretty good for myself if I must say so myself. Life is just humming along.
I came back to town to visit my sister and mother this weekend, and mind you, i haven't activtly thought about crack in months and even then just passing thoughts. it's just not a part of my daily life anymore.
not 20 seconds after I left my mom's house, it's like the "crack map" in my head just cut on lol. I no longer have the ability to look at my home town as a regular place. Every exit is where such and such dealer lives. Every street is such and suches house where I used to get high at. Just out of pure habit. It's like triggers that never went away. I can drive around lexington with all the money in the world and i am just not really tempted to do anything. man I almost have to drive through little rock blind folded just to get out of the city unscathed.
If the end game is to not use, if possible, MOVE. I cannot stress this enough. this is just coming fro personal experience. If you really do want quit and you aren't lying to yourself you won't chase the problem when you move. But it's hard if not almost impossible to live in addiction and then expect to one day just cut it off and not see that crackhouse for what it is. i wish i would have learned that 6 years ago, the first time i tried to get clean i had 11 and a half months clean and was just approached by an "old friend" at a gas station while i was harmlessly pumping 20 dollars worth of gas in my car. 10 minutes later i was high as a kite.
This is hard enough as it is.
I've been clean for a while now. about a year and a half. I've moved from my home city and moved to Kentucky a bout a year ago, lexington to be specific. I'm doing pretty good for myself if I must say so myself. Life is just humming along.
I came back to town to visit my sister and mother this weekend, and mind you, i haven't activtly thought about crack in months and even then just passing thoughts. it's just not a part of my daily life anymore.
not 20 seconds after I left my mom's house, it's like the "crack map" in my head just cut on lol. I no longer have the ability to look at my home town as a regular place. Every exit is where such and such dealer lives. Every street is such and suches house where I used to get high at. Just out of pure habit. It's like triggers that never went away. I can drive around lexington with all the money in the world and i am just not really tempted to do anything. man I almost have to drive through little rock blind folded just to get out of the city unscathed.
If the end game is to not use, if possible, MOVE. I cannot stress this enough. this is just coming fro personal experience. If you really do want quit and you aren't lying to yourself you won't chase the problem when you move. But it's hard if not almost impossible to live in addiction and then expect to one day just cut it off and not see that crackhouse for what it is. i wish i would have learned that 6 years ago, the first time i tried to get clean i had 11 and a half months clean and was just approached by an "old friend" at a gas station while i was harmlessly pumping 20 dollars worth of gas in my car. 10 minutes later i was high as a kite.
This is hard enough as it is.
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