cuyootoo

Living in the moment is what alcohol did for me. Life is incredibly boring in this modern world. The threats and hunger are not immediate. I just realized why I liked alcohol so much even though there are so many vile things about alcohol. Alcohol made it easy for me to live in the moment.

Have you ever noticed that feeling you get right before you are about to fall asleep and you know that you are about to fall asleep because of that feeling? I used to get that feeling right before I became drunk. I used to wonder at what point I would become drunk and I found it. It's a shift.

So my question is, how can I live in the moment without alcohol?

artsoul

I try to stay in the moment as much as possible and for me at least, it's a way of being connected to what's going on around me and inside me (instead of being off in my head). When I catch myself worrying about the future, for example, I try to stop and refocus on what I'm doing, how it feels to be sitting in a chair, the temperature of the room, the sounds around me, etc.....

Focusing on your breathing is another way of pulling yourself back to the moment. It takes a lot practice to get good at it (like years), but eventually you can come to a "point of stillness" where your thoughts aren't running all over the place.

I understand what you mean when you talk about alcohol....... it does dampen the thinking. But it also takes away the connection to life, which is what life is about and where the joy comes from.

That's my 2 cents anyway.... And things do seem boring for a while, because we're not riding a chemical roller coaster anymore. It took months for new things to start coming into my life and slowly I found myself not being bored anymore.

Dee74

Alcohol made it easy for me to live *outside* the moment.

Like Artsoul said getting wasted took away my connection to life, which is what life is about and where the joy comes from.

Living in the moment is about getting that joy back..and joy, in my experience, is something completely different to oblivion.

You can't mistake one for the other, IMO

D

aNewDawn

You know, I was thinking about that yesterday morning... I am not exactly sure that I am living the moment when I am not drinking myself, but I sure as hell notice that I actually have a life when I don't drink. Let me explain: When I drink, I get home from work, grab the alcohol and food on the way and start sipping away until I fall asleep. That's how it goes. Sometimes I head to the Gym in the morning before work, but that's about all I do.

In the last three days I noticed how I have other interests that are worth doing. Just some simple stuff like doing sports, going to the movies ( I went to Lion King 3D yesterday, such a cute movie and exactly what I needed), reading the newspaper (not just half of an online article before passing out or drifting away because I can't concentrate), or simply go and see stuff in the city.
I've been sitting at a rather central place yesterday watching tourists taking pictures and enjoying their visit to Berlin. I know it seems like a silly thing to do, but I really enjoyed it and that was when I thought I was "living in the moment" for the very first time in a long time.

In the end, I personally don't care all that much... All I want to have is "a life" and be out there. I have hid myself from everyone long enough.

I'll definitely follow this thread for great advice from others though, maybe there is more to it!

adore79

hi cuyootoo

I learned a lot about mindfullness and 'living in the moment' by reading the book wherever you go there you are by Jon Kabat-Zinn. when im actively trying to be mindfull it really helps a lot, i wish i would do it more often. goodluck to you!

NewBeginning010

Drinking is never in the moment in my experience, if anything it is escaping it. In regards to that perfect glow after a certain amount of drinks... yeah we all get that part until it turns on us after we have more & more.

Try reading "The Power of Now" & try some meditation, you will find yourself my happier living in a sober now without all of the stuff that comes from alcohol, including those awful hangovers. (found a link to the audio free online here: Practicing The Power of NOW - Eckhart Tolle - Full Audio Book - YouTube)

All of the best in your recovery.

Cheers ~ NB

overthis

Isn't there a huge difference between living in the moment and just simply existing? Like others have said, alcohol is all about escaping the moment or life in general. Although, being sober makes you a lot more in touch with worries and uncertainties about the future, it sure as hell beats avoiding your own life altogether. Anyways, don't know if that makes sense but I can relate to this post because sometimes the alcoholic part of my mind tries to trick me into thinking I'm more alive when drinking. I refuse to let alcohol define my present or future.

AcceptingChange

I am pursuing the same approach as adore79. I've read that book too, plus a couple other Zen books. Zen is a fascinating set of ideas.

You said "life is incredibly boring in the modern world". How about saying "I haven't learned how to find interesting things in the modern world." A big part of the problem is you just lost your favorite habit. So you are in a state of sadness, because you just lost something that took up a lot of your day. You spent time planning on drinking, drinking, and recovering from drinking. Now, you're moving away from that. In Caroline Knapps book "Drinking: A Love Story", she said that when she stopped drinking, it was like a romantic split, like she broke up with a serious, intimate relationship.
She had a hard time finding how to fill the time hole that occurred, just like a person who splits with their primary mate has a time hole. You need to replace the time hole with something that interests you. Also, you may have a lot of alcohol chemicals left in your body. That has a depressing effect on your mind. You need to give your body time to cleanse itself, and get back to producing the 'happy chemicals' that the brain naturally produces. But that 'happy chemical production' gets impacted when we drink & drug. So, you need to expect to feel less than happy as your body begins healing, and starts to make more of the natural happiness chemicals.

Maybe start by writing down the type of people you admire, you respect, and figure out what makes them someone you admire. What skills and traits do they have? What can you do to start on the road to becoming a person you yourself find interesting? You can only be happy by being active, by doing something. In the past, we drinkers stimulated our mind by drinking. But that isn't working for me anymore. The negative effects are more painful than the positive effects.
So now, we ex-drinkers have to discover new ways to be active in life. Our old activity was destroying us. And we can't just sit on the couch our whole lives being passive, waiting for life to make us happy. We have to be part of life, active in it, engaged in it. It's not like watching a movie, it's more like being an actor in the movie. Johnny Depp has more fun in his movies than the audience does. So, we have to teach ourselves how to be active in life. Because we spent years escaping from some active parts of life by drinking. Drinking is not a creative activity. But it convinces us it is, because it artificially overstimulates our brain. It's a con.

I have boring moments in my life, and it can make me feel depressed. But that depressive feeling passes. Then, other days i have very good moments, and whole days of feeling good. I won't always be happy, just like i can't always be at the perfect peak of an alcohol buzz.

Anna

In my opinion, this is SO not true.

I hope that you can shift your thinking and see the world in a different way.

Maybe you could start a Gratitude Journal and it would help you to shift your thoughts to a more positive way.