CanfixONLYme

Holy crap... I just read "My own relapse" post on here and I have to say I'm disgusted with the responses from all the 'well intended' who sat on their judgy-judgerton chairs and threw stones at Wanttobehealthy while probably dealing with similar challenges in their own lives.

I don't have the backstory on "Want" yet, but THIS IS HER JOURNEY... NOT YOURS!!! It may take her a few years/ a few months/ a few days/ a few hours/ a few minutes to get to the holier than thou place that you all seem to be at and I hope to God she never gets there if she ends up being like you.

These Forums in my opinion are NOT for giving advice and then getting pissed off because the person in pain has not followed through with YOUR "wise words of wisdom".

She's on here for support and love... THAT'S IT and frankly, you all should be ashamed of yourselves and your mighter-than-thou attitudes.

Wanttobehealthy, we each go through our own paths in life. You have been married to this man for 10 years and it's going to take time to get your head around what the ultimate thing to do is. Yes, he may be doing all what the 'wise' witches said, but that my friend is for you to finally know in your heart. He's your husband for God's sake... and DIVORCE is a very very hard decision to make that only YOU should be making... NOT SOME HEN PARTY PECKING and "QUACKING" THEIR OWN OPINIONS on YOUR matter.

Chin up k? Keep coming back here... Jeez. You signed up in March and have posted so much already. Shows that you are determined to want to find an answer and peace in your life. I am too and it's going to take whatever time WE need to figure it out. You'll get there one day... just as I will... but it won't be on anyone else's 'recovery schedule' except our own.

Big hugs to you and everyone who are here to support others in their journey...

CanfixONLYme

ps. I just want to give an extra shout out to Wanttobehealthy again. I re-read the "My own relapse" post and have to give you amazingly high fives girl!!! It's unfortunate that your advice witches couldn't take some of their own medicine and either said "I'm done" (good riddance) --- or "You're being confrontational"... ha ha ha ha ha!!!! oh man... These people sure got some great tips from their addicted loved ones.

But man W, it looks as though you are very strong and capable and are wanting to see the best for your whole family. It might not happen in the way that you want/expect, but keep coming back here, keep learning from life and you'll get there one day.

Again, I'm saying this because I'm in the middle of the mire myself as well. Some days I feel like I'm going insane and some days I feel really strong. That's what life is all about. You need love and support within these forums and I would suggest even tho' your AH has a problem with alcohol, you may glean some great and supportive love from the substance abuse forum for families.

There's a lot of fantastic people there who have been on this site for a long time and they have never judged me for falling down, or wading through the confusing fog that I'm currently in.

They have given me a reason to fight for myself and my recovery... and have given me the strength to keep coming back here.

Dee74

It's not our policy here to have threads that comment on other threads. Theres plenty of places for people to have their say....I posted this on another thread with a similar topic for example

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ml#post2947615

I think if things are getting folks hot under the collar, it's good to push the chair back, switch the PC off and get a little perspective on things. Walk the dog, play with the kids...come back later.

D