got a new job don't I deserve a drink to celebrate?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: usa
Posts: 55
got a new job don't I deserve a drink to celebrate?
I have been sober for 9 weeks and have been doing really good. I have been able to do the little things I use to hate doing because I am not hungover. I even speak clearer now and don't get my words mixed up like I use to.
I even got a better job today that I really wanted and now sober know I can do a great job at! Now that brings me to the question. I was so thrilled I got the job that I felt like I should drink to celebrate. My body doesn't want me to drink because the next day I feel like cr*p, but my mind was telling me I deserve to drink and celebrate. What do you guys do in these situations? I decided to buy my wife dinner and had a glass of soda and I kinda feel that I deserve a drink. I apologize that this entire post is self-centered, just trying to do something other then drink.
I even got a better job today that I really wanted and now sober know I can do a great job at! Now that brings me to the question. I was so thrilled I got the job that I felt like I should drink to celebrate. My body doesn't want me to drink because the next day I feel like cr*p, but my mind was telling me I deserve to drink and celebrate. What do you guys do in these situations? I decided to buy my wife dinner and had a glass of soda and I kinda feel that I deserve a drink. I apologize that this entire post is self-centered, just trying to do something other then drink.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: New England
Posts: 5,285
Hey! And congrats on the news job....you deserve NOT to drink
for me the only way to get and stay sober is to no longer equate drinking with celebration and reward. I'm not saying it doesn't take some work to change decades of wrong thinking but it is doable.
For me it was easier to change this mind set than the drown your sorrows mindset. But honestly...its great you got a new job why drink poison to celebrate????
for me the only way to get and stay sober is to no longer equate drinking with celebration and reward. I'm not saying it doesn't take some work to change decades of wrong thinking but it is doable.For me it was easier to change this mind set than the drown your sorrows mindset. But honestly...its great you got a new job why drink poison to celebrate????
RIP Sweet Suki
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: In my sanctuary, my home
Posts: 39,910
Congratulations on 9 weeks and the new job!! 
You are still in early sobriety, so it's not unusual that your alcoholic mind is still talking to you. It's like when someone goes for 6 months not drinking and considers celebrating with a drink. It just doesn't make sense. Taking your wife to dinner was a good option and not drinking was an even better one. The more you say no to that little voice, the weaker it becomes and the stronger you become.
Hang in there! You're doing great!
You are still in early sobriety, so it's not unusual that your alcoholic mind is still talking to you. It's like when someone goes for 6 months not drinking and considers celebrating with a drink. It just doesn't make sense. Taking your wife to dinner was a good option and not drinking was an even better one. The more you say no to that little voice, the weaker it becomes and the stronger you become.
Hang in there! You're doing great!
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,444
Hey doublecheck
congrats on the new job
It took me a while but I'm able fast forward right to where that drink will take me now...
there's no celebration in that - degradation maybe...
You made a great call - way to go
D
congrats on the new job
It took me a while but I'm able fast forward right to where that drink will take me now...
there's no celebration in that - degradation maybe...
You made a great call - way to go
D
Member
Join Date: Sep 2010
Posts: 395
Correct me if I am wrong, but I am assuming that since you are seeking recovery and posting on this board that your drinking is anything, but celebratory.
If you were able have a drink in a celebratory manner, then you wouldn't be here. Again, correct me if I am wrong, but your drinking doesn't invite celebration into your life, but it invites a level of chaos and destruction.
Gratz on the new job.
If you were able have a drink in a celebratory manner, then you wouldn't be here. Again, correct me if I am wrong, but your drinking doesn't invite celebration into your life, but it invites a level of chaos and destruction.
Gratz on the new job.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: usa
Posts: 55
not wrong
Irony is I had to do a different kind of job for the past 5 years because I wasn't able to get a job I wanted because of a dui. I was able to control myself and not drink and drive EVER but it cost me a ton of money and hurt my career. Now that I got a new job that I wanted that includes driving I wanted to drink to celebrate makes zero sense.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2010
Posts: 395
Originally Posted by doublecheck 
Irony is I had to do a different kind of job for the past 5 years because I wasn't able to get a job I wanted because of a dui. I was able to control myself and not drink and drive EVER but it cost me a ton of money and hurt my career. Now that I got a new job that I wanted that includes driving I wanted to drink to celebrate makes zero sense.
lol....welcome to the asylum. I being a bit facetious, but you hit the nail on the head; the way we think sometimes regarding booze is purely insane.
Its like we know that 2 + 2 = 4, but when we do that calculation in our head regarding alcohol we often get a number that is not four...something doesn't add up.
April 18, 2010
Join Date: Apr 2010
Posts: 1,117
hey doublecheck. Congratulations on your nine weeks and your new job!
I used to always want to celebrate every good thing with booze--and nicer booze than what I normally drank. It's gotten much easier for me to have accomplishments without wanting to drink to celebrate, though, so I hope it will get easier for you too. What I did when I was feeling how you are feeling now was remind myself that the achievement itself was a reward/the "good thing" on its own. I didn't need to add something on top of it. And yeah, those celebrations never worked out well anyway . . I would just wake up feeling miserable and full of doubt, anxiety, and insecurity about whatever it was I'd been celebrating the night before.
So, hang in there, and try to ride this excitement out on its own. Experiencing these intense emotions does get easier and easier, in my experience.
Congrats again!
I used to always want to celebrate every good thing with booze--and nicer booze than what I normally drank. It's gotten much easier for me to have accomplishments without wanting to drink to celebrate, though, so I hope it will get easier for you too. What I did when I was feeling how you are feeling now was remind myself that the achievement itself was a reward/the "good thing" on its own. I didn't need to add something on top of it. And yeah, those celebrations never worked out well anyway . . I would just wake up feeling miserable and full of doubt, anxiety, and insecurity about whatever it was I'd been celebrating the night before.
So, hang in there, and try to ride this excitement out on its own. Experiencing these intense emotions does get easier and easier, in my experience.
Congrats again!
SR Fan
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Mississippi
Posts: 7,910
I can relate..... you got a great job because you stayed sober, so why not drink over it? Make sense to me!
Any strong emotion is going to set off that knee-jerk reaction. The first time I had that "celebration urge" it was hard to resist, but now I find I can enjoy just being really happy about something. I do a little jig, throw out a few "whoop whoops", spend a few bucks on myself, and share with family/friends. Today, that's enough for me.
Keep going strong - those thoughts really will eventually die out.
Any strong emotion is going to set off that knee-jerk reaction. The first time I had that "celebration urge" it was hard to resist, but now I find I can enjoy just being really happy about something. I do a little jig, throw out a few "whoop whoops", spend a few bucks on myself, and share with family/friends. Today, that's enough for me.
Keep going strong - those thoughts really will eventually die out.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Posts: 8,614
You need to take stock of what you have. Drinking would be ridiculous. Think of all the people out there who are trying to make ends meet and come up short because getting a job is next to impossible these days. And thank your lucky stars you have a wife to celebrate your new job with. You have a job that you wanted and a partner to be happy for you. Let yourself think about that for a bit, and consider what drinking would do to the situation.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Germany
Posts: 2,058
Great news on the job DC and your sobriety!! I know it took me a while as I was making change to get my mindset in check. For so many years alcohol was used to reward or to punish myself....ugh. When I got sober I had to work through each new experience and coming and sharing here was very helpful.
Way to go on your choice and I would just amp up the support if you find yourself thinking about the drinking.
Way to go on your choice and I would just amp up the support if you find yourself thinking about the drinking.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: England
Posts: 70
I'm going to sound like a dick here and go against the grain, but I'd have a drink to celebrate if you genuinely believe you can handle it. Stick on a few beers and don't get too drunk.
If you can do it once, you can do it again. And may rid yourself of a curse and anxiety.
BUT If you fall and falter like the majority of us do, you know the painful outcome. ****. Misery. Destruction.
Take care either way,
Rich
If you can do it once, you can do it again. And may rid yourself of a curse and anxiety.
BUT If you fall and falter like the majority of us do, you know the painful outcome. ****. Misery. Destruction.
Take care either way,
Rich
Member
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: CA
Posts: 36
Originally Posted by Rickie
I'm going to sound like a dick here and go against the grain, but I'd have a drink to celebrate if you genuinely believe you can handle it. Stick on a few beers and don't get too drunk.
If you can do it once, you can do it again. And may rid yourself of a curse and anxiety.
BUT If you fall and falter like the majority of us do, you know the painful outcome. ****. Misery. Destruction.
Take care either way,
Rich
If you can do it once, you can do it again. And may rid yourself of a curse and anxiety.
BUT If you fall and falter like the majority of us do, you know the painful outcome. ****. Misery. Destruction.
Take care either way,
Rich
Weigh the voices in your head and decide which one has reason on its side.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,444
Originally Posted by Rickie
I'm going to sound like a dick here and go against the grain, but I'd have a drink to celebrate if you genuinely believe you can handle it. Stick on a few beers and don't get too drunk.
If you can do it once, you can do it again. And may rid yourself of a curse and anxiety.
BUT If you fall and falter like the majority of us do, you know the painful outcome. ****. Misery. Destruction.
Take care either way,
Rich
If you can do it once, you can do it again. And may rid yourself of a curse and anxiety.
BUT If you fall and falter like the majority of us do, you know the painful outcome. ****. Misery. Destruction.
Take care either way,
Rich
I think most of us already know how that painful outcome thing plays out.
D
Member
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Germany
Posts: 2,058
Unhealthy advice. Thank God I never received the go ahead and drink response when I came here struggling and new to sobriety.
That turned my stomach and normally I just move on and let these things go. Not cool at all.
That turned my stomach and normally I just move on and let these things go. Not cool at all.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Posts: 264
I had a moment like this yesterday. I'm a photographer and was talking through a project I thought would be impossible. I sort of had a breakthrough and figured it out. She told me I should wait a couple more months. On the way home though, I was very excited and had an urge to drink. To celebrate. I think I heard somewhere to be careful of the highs as well of the lows. Yesterday I "got it" a little more. I understand why she wants me to wait.
Congrats on the new job!
Congrats on the new job!
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
