Where do I go from here?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Orlando, FL
Posts: 4
Where do I go from here?
Today I hope to stop drinking. I have had a problem with alcohol for about 4 years - I have never admitted it to anyone. I drink about 1 1/2 bottles of wine every night. I function totally during the day. I have two wonderful teenagers and a great husband. I work part time and am involved with my kids' activities. I never drink during the day and don't ever want to.
What I really want is to be able to have the occasional drink. I've been so afraid of life without alcohol because I really do enjoy that first glass of wine.
I used to have an eating disorder but sought help several years ago through a therapist and some OA meetings and probably when I recovered from that is when the drinking started. I swapped one vice for another I guess.
I hated going to OA meetings. I hate admitting these horrible problems in public. I'm afraid I will see someone I know (and I did at OA). But I do want to get better. I'm afraid I might have health issues if I don't stop. I'm afraid my kids will do the same thing. I'm afraid of what it might do to my marriage.
Not really sure what the next step is....
What I really want is to be able to have the occasional drink. I've been so afraid of life without alcohol because I really do enjoy that first glass of wine.
I used to have an eating disorder but sought help several years ago through a therapist and some OA meetings and probably when I recovered from that is when the drinking started. I swapped one vice for another I guess.
I hated going to OA meetings. I hate admitting these horrible problems in public. I'm afraid I will see someone I know (and I did at OA). But I do want to get better. I'm afraid I might have health issues if I don't stop. I'm afraid my kids will do the same thing. I'm afraid of what it might do to my marriage.
Not really sure what the next step is....
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 82
Yes, the thought of never drinking again and the desire to just have that one glass is so overwhelming isnt it? Just take baby steps, one day at a time, as they say. And although you say you want to be able to have just that one glass of wine, do you, only have one I mean?
Welcome to SR ellie.
Welcome to SR ellie.
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,784
I'm an ex-wino now sober for 14 months and happier than ever.
I too used to want to be able to have 'just one' but know that's a fantasy as I never wanted just one, it was always a bottle or two or three....
Welcome to the family.
I too used to want to be able to have 'just one' but know that's a fantasy as I never wanted just one, it was always a bottle or two or three....
Welcome to the family.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,445
Hi Ellie
Sounds like you're facing the impasse many of us face:
I think you're making the right choice in wanting to do something about this - it really does not get better as we go further down the drinking road.
You'll find a lot of support here
Welcome!
D
Sounds like you're facing the impasse many of us face:
What I really want is to be able to have the occasional drink.
vs
Never have only one and probably don't want only one. Very scary.
You'll find a lot of support here
Welcome!
D
Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Posts: 873
Welcome ellie.
I used to be afraid of life without alcohol too. I still am sort of. Eventually I just decided to give it a try and see how different my life would be without it. Never said I'd quit forever, just for a vague amount of time.
I'm only on day 40 and it hasn't all been a picnic but the experiment has sure opened my eyes. Maybe one of the best things I've ever done. Don't be afraid, give it a try.
I used to be afraid of life without alcohol too. I still am sort of. Eventually I just decided to give it a try and see how different my life would be without it. Never said I'd quit forever, just for a vague amount of time.
I'm only on day 40 and it hasn't all been a picnic but the experiment has sure opened my eyes. Maybe one of the best things I've ever done. Don't be afraid, give it a try.
SR Fan
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Mississippi
Posts: 7,910
Welcome elle - it's totally scary.... I'm sure everyone here can relate to that! But you only have to take it one day at a time. Just don't drink today and deal with tomorrow when it gets here. Take it one hour at a time if you have to.
If you have bad hangovers (withdrawal symptoms), it's good to see a doctor for help, too. That's scary too, I know, but it makes those first few days of sobriety so much easier.
The truth is, if we can do it, so can you. Not drinking is strange at first, but it gets better each day - keep reading everyone's posts and you'll see that life can be good again, really good. We're here for you!
p.s. give yourself a pat on the back for getting up the courage to post - it takes courage to admit our problem and reach out for help.:ghug3
If you have bad hangovers (withdrawal symptoms), it's good to see a doctor for help, too. That's scary too, I know, but it makes those first few days of sobriety so much easier.
The truth is, if we can do it, so can you. Not drinking is strange at first, but it gets better each day - keep reading everyone's posts and you'll see that life can be good again, really good. We're here for you!
p.s. give yourself a pat on the back for getting up the courage to post - it takes courage to admit our problem and reach out for help.:ghug3
Member
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Northern Ireland
Posts: 129
Hi and welcome Ellie! I'm in the same situation as you - drinking wine alone most nights. Ideally I'd like to be able to have 'just the one' in the future, but I don't know if that's possible.
I can only echo what other posters have said - take it one day at a time and see how it goes. That's what I'm doing, this is my first day. I'll think about tomorrow when it happens.
Best of luck on your journey, you've come to the right place!
I can only echo what other posters have said - take it one day at a time and see how it goes. That's what I'm doing, this is my first day. I'll think about tomorrow when it happens.
Best of luck on your journey, you've come to the right place!
A work in progress
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: South Jersey
Posts: 16,633
Don't try.
Seriously. What this takes is NOT DRINKING. We DON'T DRINK, under any and all circumstances. If you haven't dumped the booze yet, do it. Get it all out of the house. It makes it a bit tougher to simply pour something on impulse.
Seriously. What this takes is NOT DRINKING. We DON'T DRINK, under any and all circumstances. If you haven't dumped the booze yet, do it. Get it all out of the house. It makes it a bit tougher to simply pour something on impulse.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Louisiana...GO SAINTS!!!
Posts: 22
Ellie...happiness is waking up and being sooo happy you didn't drink the night before!!!!
I too cannot have one glass socially...funny, but I don't like or even think about drinking at home. But a social setting got me in trouble...for way too long. I quit just last weekend, and have zero desire for one. I just said enough...Hang in there.
I too cannot have one glass socially...funny, but I don't like or even think about drinking at home. But a social setting got me in trouble...for way too long. I quit just last weekend, and have zero desire for one. I just said enough...Hang in there.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: New England
Posts: 5,285
Hi and welcome!
You should prubably talk to your doctor about withdrawal....some people have a dangerous time withdrawing. Life without wine is wonderful...after I quit I realized it didn't even taste good.
LaFemme
You should prubably talk to your doctor about withdrawal....some people have a dangerous time withdrawing. Life without wine is wonderful...after I quit I realized it didn't even taste good.
LaFemme
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