completeazz

Well I don't know much about AA or NA, I do know I need to admit to myself that I have a very serious problem. And I need help.

I am an Alcoholic and use Marijuana and to top it off I've been on Social Security for the last 6 years due to extreme anxiety, panic attacks and seizures and take several medications not intended to be swallowed with alcohol.

This is not a new years resolution, although I wish anyone who uses this new year to get clean the best of luck.

I'm on day two without alcohol or marijuana and it's becoming apparent that quitting is going to be very painfull. But I've become a monster and lose control %99 of time for the last few years when I drink and it's time to take action.

I'm not going to go into my life story on my very first post so I'll post more later.

Thanks for reading.

McGowdog

Welcome and nice fish. Looks like a big crappie or something.

If you go to A.A., I hope you find someone who gives you the dignity to keep an open mind right from the start; an open mind about what is A.A., alcoholism, God, booze, SR, etc. Whether you're an alcoholic or not isn't always a feeling or a determination of the mind. You really need to have someone help you look at you and booze and how you drink/drank it and come to find YOUR own truth in this.

In otherwords, it's not about you convincing anybody else one way or another... but to determine for yourself... if you've got this and need help.

Happy New Year and welcome again to SR.

jaitch

Thank you for that im in the last throws of dependence. I have only one option at the ete moment Surrender.

Mark75

Welcome completeazz...

Sounds like alcohol may be a problem for you, might even be THE problem for you... it can make people anxious and panicky all by itself... and of course, taking medication with it, well... anything can happen then.

Quitting anything that a person has become dependent on can be painful, sometimes even dangerous... Maybe you want to get some help... Does your doctor know about the alcohol and pot? Maybe (s)he can help??

Welcome to SR!!

Mark

lam

I have been drinking for about 17 years. I has progressively worstened. When it began it was a teenage party thing. Then buy the time I was 28 i found my self drinking alone. That was 3 nights a week, now it's 5. I used o do cocaine, that I haven't touched in 10 years. I had a surgery in the begining of the year, and know i find myself using any reason i can think of to get more vicodin. I have a good job, it doesn't effect that, i bought a home on my own and raise a child on my own. I didn't touch a single substance for 9 months when i was pregnant and i wasn't tempted at all. I wish I didn't have the temptation now.. I have to stop. I dont want my child to see this. he is three, and the drinking is like clockwork after he goes to bed. My boyfriend is not a drinker, and doesn't know of this. He works nights. It does effect my relationship because of the anxiety i feel.
I'm not making excuses, but I can not make a meeting. I just moved here and I don't have a babysitter. This is about the time I would start drinking, insted I am here. I hope this can help for now.

coldhouse

I appreciate what mccgowdog says about finding your own path. I'm still looking and find it hard not to compare.

CarolD

Welcome to our recovery community and to our
Alcoholism 12 Step Support Forum Step Study

completeazz ..

lam ...

coldhouse...

Here is AA Step 1.... Can you relate to Step 1?

Sober25

I'm glad that you are here. Based on what you just shared it sounds like AA is where you need to be. Our first step is "we admitted we were powerless over alcohol - that our lives had become unmanageable."

You could benefit from getting into AA. You may want to check your phone book. There are probably meetings in your area. At least that is the case with most people. It's free, no one will force you to do anything. You may find that it's a great place to learn how to live without alcohol. For many of us it literally saved our lives. I wish you all the best.



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BB quotes from 1st edition