chedley

Hello everyone,
I am so glad i have found this site.Its a relief just knowing i am not the only person going thru these things.
I had been using oxys for about 6 months and then started to smoke heroin due to cost.I am trying really hard to ween myself off. I am down to smoking a little in the morning just so i can get out the door and go to work,but i just cannot stop totally.I am struggling hard but just cant seem to do it. My friend gave me some sub-oxys(orange pills) but i am kind of afraid to try them.Every day i tell myself i am going to try the sub-oxy in the morning but always end up smoking a little H.
I am so fed up of the life i am leading right now and i am ashamed of myself,but still cannot quit.

tbeit

Dude you need to talk to a Dr.Those pills are not something to be played with.They can put you into total withdrawal.If they are what I think they are the name is suboxone.Im not in anyway judging you because I have taken pills that I didnt know what they were but we are addicts not Drs.Self medicating is dangerous you are not alone there are Drs who just work with people like us.Do a search on suboxone and they have a list of Drs who can help you.If you start on Fri. you can probably make work on Mon Good Luck keep posting

Jrock75

I myself never got to deep into opiates.. my personal drugs have been pot and any hallucinagen(sp?),and I'm trying to deal with my anxiety with xanax without getting addicted(lol... I know) But I am a painter,and have seen friends die off of oxycotins,and see people popping vicodin like skittles just to fall off a ladder and get rushed to the hospital.
I think you made a good step in your recovery just recognizing you need to change.. how you do that is not my place to say.( I can't tell someone to quit their D.O.C when I haven't even attemted to drop mine) All I can do is wish you the best of luck I hope things go well for you.

Nallabelle

Never heard of suboxy. I agree with tbeit that orange pill with the word sub sounds like suboxone.
Ive never smoked heroin but I have taken a ton of pain killers. I didnt know heroin was cheaper or I probably would have been doing that instead because I know its stronger.
Anyway back to you... Youre smoking it now. Unfortuntaly your next step will be shooting it. Do you want to be an IV heroin user? That could really put your life in danger in so many ways.
Other people on here know more about heroin than I do and can give you better advice. But if you are only smoking it once a day it seems like you should be able to come off it rather quickly and maybe not too painfully. Suboxone might not be a bad way for you to go but make sure you learn all the facts first because I know first hand its not easy to come off of. Ive learned that being afraid of withdrawal isnt a reason to keep using. Its going to be hard no matter what route you go, but the only way you are going to get and stay (more importantly, STAY) sober is if you really really want to. Go to NA

Nallabelle

Also you have included your heroin use into part of your daily routine. So you have to work hard at breaking that routine. Try going to starbucks instead of smoking heroin.

Stagebear

The good news? You no longer need to be ashamed. You've asked for help. Give yourself a break. It can be okay now, depending on what you do next.

The less-than-good-news? It sounds like the mental obsession is as strong for you as the physical addiction. That's tough to break.

Question: what are you willing to do now? Are you willing to do whatever it takes to get out of that trap?

Awaiting your answer, I remain,

Shellslove

Welcome, Chedley Please do not take these pills w/o consulting a doctor. I know it is scary, intimidating, embarassing, etc -- but trust me they've heard it all before, and they'll know how to help or direct you to someone who can. It sounds like the pills your friend gave you are Suboxone (hexagon shaped orange pill - can't be sure w/o seeing them) --- I know as an addict it's easy to just take anything put in front of you - don't! Google Suboxone or Subutex and do some research first. Suboxone is partial opiate but also an opiate antagonist - meaning basically an opiate's enemy and opposite. They block you from feeling the effects of other opiates, which is good --- but they also knock opiate you already have in your head outta there. That means - you need to be in pretty good withdrawals before taking it or it will make you sick. Also, some people have bad reactions to the medication, which is why you should be under a drs care-- these pills should NOT be taken w/o a drs supervision.

I know, I know - we take everything under the moon we're given - but it sounds like you want to make a change. You want Recovery! If you take suboxone you've gotten from a friend and use them w/o talking to a dr and getting a good plan of recovery going, you're likely to swap addictions...or use the subs as an inbetween when you can't get your hands on heroin...and that is just a merry-go-round in he!! you DO NOT want to ride on. TRUST ME! Get to a doctor, try an aa/na meeting - you can get off the dope - but that's not enough - your lifestyle needs to change and that includes no longer hanging out with people who sell/give you handfuls of pills, IMO.

karma35

i just have to add..
getting off heroin is no walk in the park
get some proper help from your doctor and dont self medicate - imo it does not work if you are a 'practising addict'.
i am a heroin addict(a .2g bag a day) and i know where you're at.
Good luck
Karma

kj3880

Have you tried NA or going to an Addictionologist or clinic? Those are good options to start. Suboxone was a good plan for me to get off of opiates, but needs to be medically supervised. You will get real sick if you take it with h. in your system. You are supposed to be off opiates for at least 12 hours or so to start it. And you need to be under a doctor's care. It is one of the safest drugs in it's class, according to my doc, but also very unpleasant if you don't know what you are doing. It doesn't do anything if you just swallow it. It needs to be dissolved under your tongue for 20-30 minutes before you swallow it. That's a pain in the rump, I know, because your mouth gets all full of suboxone fluid and you can't talk for 1/2 an hour every day, twice a day. But a small price to pay for something that really helped me. When you look for a suboxone doctor, please ask around at meetings (afterwards, not during) or from friends to find a recommendation of a kind and caring one who won't take advantage of you.

Love,
KJ

Give

chedley

Thank you for advice.I have decided not to self medicate as i am scared enough as it is right now.
I live in such a small community that drug doctors are not everywhere,but after reading posts i made some calls and have found a local doctor that deals with drug addiction and i am going to call him tomorrow.I so appreciate your posts as i am leaning on them heavily right now.So lonely in my double life i am leading right now,but feels great to have contact with you all.I wish everyone the best and thank you.

Tish28

Keep posting.
We're pulling for you. Don't forget to call the docter!!
Have a lovely day.

change4penny

Chedley
I'm a recovering opiate/cocaine addict, 171 days clean. I had a very bad opiate addiction for more than 10 years. Before entering rehab, I was taking 30, 10mg hydro-or-oxycodones a day. While in rehab, they started me on Suboxone and yes, you have to disolve it under your tongue. Before starting it, you have to make sure you have no opiates in your system, this includes heroin. Make sure you ask your doctor about the sub. For me, it's been a miracle! I stopped the withdrawls, and the cravings for opiates!
But, this alone won't help...find a good NA meeting for support. Getting clean is far more than just stopping the drugs...You gotta learn how to live without them.
Good luck, God bless, and keep posting!
:praying

kj3880

If you aren't comfortable going to NA, can you go to AA? You need some support, face-to-face. Even if you have to drive to the next town over to get it.

Love,
KJ

BrandMusic

Chedley
Im in the prossess of becoming sober from herion. I started smoking it once a day. a few months later it went to twice a day. Two months after that i was a IV Herion addict. It hits you like a brick, you never see it comming. You turn a corner and you run into a wall of trouble that doesnt let you go. Congrats on getting a doctor. Make sure you follow through and keep posting.

SoCalTeen

Pain killers are fun, but I like Xanax better. I have anxiety and I started xanax in 11th grade (I'm a sophomore in college, now) and you know what? It went from .25/day to .5 a day to 1mg/day to what it was 2 weeks ago, 1-2mg/day. That's my prescription. I get 30mg/month....which I would blow though in a week.

For me, quitting xanax isn't that bad, since I don't do it every day. But it's so tempting to just call the pharmacy and start popping pills. After my best friends' mom committed suicide (by popping pills) because of her depression from MS....I went to the funeral sober (shocking!), but the day after I went to the pharmacy, got my 30mg and popped 5mg on the way home! This is after I hadn't done them for 3 weeks and while some people 5mg is not a lot, 5mg for me, (male, 5'10 & 142 pounds) is a lot.

Watch out! Xanax is a good drug to battle anxiety. However, it is very addicting.

I thought I was an addict and hopeless because I "wanted it when I didn't take it" but then I would just forget about it after 4 days and continue on with my life, but think about it sometimes. That's naive. I've read some of the horror stories about xanax addiction, and it isn't pretty!

Watch out and use as directed...because when used as your doctor prescribes...it is useful....or is that me just justifying more xanax this Friday?

....sadly, I think it's the latter....

Shellslove

Well put SoCal! good to see you around =)