That funk!
Looking For Myself...Sober
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Where the heart is
Posts: 10,209
That funk!
Well..I am finally feeling a little better. I was in the worst funk ever for the past 2 weeks.
It started with the urges. Then the anger and aggravation. The sadness. My dad coming to me with that info about my mom. Work and all normal work BS. Tired. Just one of those times. I just shut down this time. I didnt want to talk to anyone. Not on here or at home or anywhere.
And I posted in another part of the forum last week. I stated my opinion and of course it got all twisted up and taken the wrong way as usual.
And it pissed me off alot. I am not even goin to lie. I was really angry that my intentions and words were taken way way out of context.
But I wouldnt be me if I didnt say what was on my mind and say it how I feel.
It wasnt disrespectful. It was just an attempt to better understand something. I gave complete and total respect and understanding in every way possible. And still got taken the wrong way.
That sent me over the edge.
But I am not abou tto let ANYONE for ANY reason F with me and my state of well being. And I let it happen.
I am over it.
Now I am all trying to soak in all that stuff about my mother. My father came over for the first time in a long time a few days ago.
For the most part. Life is good still. I am very blessed.
But I had to step away and check myself before I blew up.
Anyway. I appreciate the ones who thought of me.
I apologise to the ones I have seen that are going through some tough times and didnt respond because I was too caught up in my own BS.
Least, Kev, Are a couple off the top of my head.
I was thinking of you guys even though I didnt respond.
Anyway. Thats where I am at.
It started with the urges. Then the anger and aggravation. The sadness. My dad coming to me with that info about my mom. Work and all normal work BS. Tired. Just one of those times. I just shut down this time. I didnt want to talk to anyone. Not on here or at home or anywhere.
And I posted in another part of the forum last week. I stated my opinion and of course it got all twisted up and taken the wrong way as usual.
And it pissed me off alot. I am not even goin to lie. I was really angry that my intentions and words were taken way way out of context.
But I wouldnt be me if I didnt say what was on my mind and say it how I feel.
It wasnt disrespectful. It was just an attempt to better understand something. I gave complete and total respect and understanding in every way possible. And still got taken the wrong way.
That sent me over the edge.
But I am not abou tto let ANYONE for ANY reason F with me and my state of well being. And I let it happen.
I am over it.
Now I am all trying to soak in all that stuff about my mother. My father came over for the first time in a long time a few days ago.
For the most part. Life is good still. I am very blessed.
But I had to step away and check myself before I blew up.
Anyway. I appreciate the ones who thought of me.
I apologise to the ones I have seen that are going through some tough times and didnt respond because I was too caught up in my own BS.
Least, Kev, Are a couple off the top of my head.
I was thinking of you guys even though I didnt respond.
Anyway. Thats where I am at.
Member
Join Date: May 2008
Location: NY
Posts: 6,608
Very glad you've returned Trish. 
Hey by the way - I got a few jobs. I start mucking a barn 2xs a week, I'm picking up a friend's daughter from softball practice every day, I will be milking goats and making cheese soon, and cleaning a house. My little jobs are starting to come in. Want to come work out here in the sunny State of New Mexico? My business cards read that I'll clean your house or your barn and wait on your farriers or anyone else so you don't have to take the day off. I've been at this for months and am now getting some response. May need your help.
Hey by the way - I got a few jobs. I start mucking a barn 2xs a week, I'm picking up a friend's daughter from softball practice every day, I will be milking goats and making cheese soon, and cleaning a house. My little jobs are starting to come in. Want to come work out here in the sunny State of New Mexico? My business cards read that I'll clean your house or your barn and wait on your farriers or anyone else so you don't have to take the day off. I've been at this for months and am now getting some response. May need your help.
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