LouLou629

HI FRIENDS! I am about five and a half months sober....Do you all recall how you felt around this time in your sobriety? Overall I feel good- but lots of strange feelings too, I still feel really raw and hypersensitive to interacting with people on a day to day level at times. I am finding that I am almost isolating myself more now that I did when I drank( even though I drank alone alot) because I have done some inventory on my relationships with alot of my grilfriends and find that maybe they arent really that great of friends after all. I just got a sponser and met with her last wed morning- I told her about this website and she said it shouldnt take the place of one on one human contact. I probably shouldnt even be writing this according to her but instead calling a total stranger ( whats the difference I guess right calling versus typing) and asking them in order to build personal relationships as to not isolate myself from the real world. I am having a hard time doing this...I really dislike "chatting" on the phone these days, and the thought of doing so with someone I dont know asking them weird questions like this makes me feel really insecure . Anyways...besides that issue I am having, and just a general overwhelming sense of emotional paranoia and some social anxiety ( I get super nervous, dry moth, shaky and always cry EVERYTIME I have to speak at a meeting..even just a simple" I am an alchoholic, and I am gratefull today")..I feel pretty good..... AM I NORMAL AT THIS STAGE OF THE GAME????

shaun00

hi lou-lou great to hear your doing well and generally pretty good.

I can totally relate to your post....i had real problems around other people and trying to communicate....mostly fear.

I didnt seem to be able to hold a conversation with people that i knew and everyone seemed distant.........anxiety seemed to get better after a year and i learnt to communicate without alcohol...

FEAR OF PEOPLE WILL LEAVE US was along time coming but it came with time.
I guess i grew a new skin but it took time..

I have a theory which relates to me...........when i should have been learning to intergrate with people and communicate with others( teenager) i was using alcohol to create someone that wasnt me.

i get to thirty odd years old and i have to re learn all that..without booze.

Your get there with time and imo its normal...............trucker

ToABetterMe

You are so much farther than me & I would like to congradulate you on that!

I'm certain you will get so of the vets to give you some great answers. I will be curious, and its good to know what to expect.

nickishine

Hey Girlfriend! Now I know why I haven't seen you here and haven't gotten any PM's for a while! Glad you're back, I've missed you!

I'm in a tough spot today (check out my thread about needing to dump...) you'll understand why... In fact, it's in relation to what you might be dealing with a little bit from your sponsor too!

When I've had the amount of time you do now if the past, it was similar in emotions as to what you're talking about! We're on a roller-coaster ride, and it's either really good and okay -- or -- it sucks and we feel out of place in life, at least that's how it is for me! Hang in there, friend! You're doing REALLY good and have great support here! Did your sponsor mean that you 100% couldn't be on this forum? Or does she want you to integrate human contact in addition to being here?

:ghug3

gravity

I experienced the social anxiety & some paranoia (that old outside looking in feeling). What really helped break down that barrier was to start going for coffee with others after meetings. Strangers no more! Takes patience and a bit of work but the anxiety will go away possibly sooner than you think. It sort of spills over to the rest of your life - comfortable around other alcoholics, comfortable around everyone.

We are all just people - nobody is better or worse than each other.

Hevyn

I say yes, LouLou - normal to me, anyway. I've just finished a year, and I recall having those feelings about half-way to where I am now. The raw feeling does get better. In many ways, we have to learn to live again & it seems to be a strange new world at times. I'm naturally shy anyway, so maybe I'm not a good judge of how you're feeling. This site has done for me what my f2f meetings have not, but it's possible I wasn't ready at that time. I love being able to do things at my own pace by visiting SR on my own terms, and sharing when I feel up to it. I appreciate not being told what's right for me. It's wonderful you're doing well, congratulations on those precious, hard earned 5-1/2 months.

Anna

I remember that at 6 months sober, I was still in a state of being amazed that I had managed to get that far. And, I had become quite open, after having isolated a lot during my drinking time. I am not an AA person, but I love SR. The benefit for me, is that I can come here and get feedback at any time.

coffeenut

Congratulations on your sobriety! Awesome.

And yes, I think you are totally normal. Just like there is NO right way to get and stay sober, there is NO right way to feel or not feel.

Take it easy....take it slow.....and breathe.

Just my very humble opinion, but SR is every bit as important as a f2f.