cassandra2

I have hope but we shall see. I am kinda scared because he still is insisting on getting moved out this weekend. Dont know what to make of all this. I guess I am stunned. I know that until he actually goes there is no point of even thinking about it but here I go.

So what should I expect from him after 4 days of inpatient detox? Do thought patterns return or is this going to be something that is similar to what I am already going through?

I have never known anyone that has been strung out on drugs and then gone into rehab. I dont know how to be supportive of him getting clean but at the same time protecting myself. The reason I had to go almost no contact was because it hurt me so much to hear him say how much he loved me and the kids but then the next day treat me like dirt and talk about how I owed him money or I needed to do this or that.

Somebody help me make heads or tales of this......

wooforever

So he is not in detox yet? Or he is in detox now? Whatever he says means nothing right now. It is the actions that mean more, then any word of an addict. They will say whatever they want to make us feel like it is our fault. They are the ones that have the adiction not us.

Have you thought about going to a group meeting. You need to seperate yourself from him. It is his rehab not yours, you need to start taking care of yourself, and your family. Start your own recovery, do not worry about him, he is doing his thing.

hello-kitty

The way you be supportive of him IS by protecting yourself. Actions not words Cassandra. It's what he does today that counts. And even if he goes to detox on Wednesday, that is no guarantee he is going to stay clean when he gets out. Recovery from addiction is a process, not a visit to detox.

That is why you must take care of yourself and let him take care of himself. Don't be too eager to sound the "all's clear" bell!

If he is truly committed to recovery, nothing you do will stop him from going after it. And if he's not committed, nothing you do can stop him from using drugs again.

cinderellawkids

my first though when you said going to detox on Wednesday, made me think he plans on being totally strung out until then. Most detoxes wont admit a person still high, or past initial stages of withdrawal (24 hours)

MsPINKAcres

Regardless of what he does or doesn't do - please remember the best thing you can do, is to take good care of YOU - make decisions on what is best for you recovery - attend a meeting, read some literature, call a recovery friend -

You are definitely worth it.

cassandra2

I know I keep reminding myself of that. I told my oldest daughter that even if he does go to detox that we still have to be mindful of him still being the same until he gets to a point where he can deal with all of this.

I have my suspisions that he is being forced to go by his family. I dont know what happened but its not good. The way he acted today leds me to believe this is not something he is doing because he is tired of being a drug addict.

You are all right today is today and right now nothing has changed. He said to me today that he was coming on Wednesday to get his things out of our apartment AND DONT FREAK OUT WHEN I DO!!!!!

The nerve of him......I kicked him out.....I decided I didnt want to live that way......I am NOT THAT KIND OF A WOMAN that is gonna BEG a freaking DRUG ADDICT to stay!!!!!!

Then he said he was counting on using MY VAN to move his stuff.....Sorry buddy figure it out!!!!!

He tried to make me feel sorry for him because then he said that he was only gonna take what he could carry. What happened to last week when he said that his mother, her bf, and his drug addict friends were coming to move him??????????????

UNBELIEVABLE!!!!! Still nowhere in sight is the man I fell in love with!!!!!! Just got caught off guard......

NeedingHelp7

Hi Cassandra,

Sometimes it's a waiting game hoping he'll do as he says he will. Be prepared either way for a disappointment or an enterance to detox. For his own sake as well as the families, I pray that he will enter detox, but there usually has to be a plan of recovery after that as well, whether it be an out/inpatient program, NA, something. People don't usually just go to detox and thats it. I'm not sure if he's mentioned anything further about that to you.

I agree with others, listen to the AH actions, not the words.

He might or might not be by to get his stuff on Wed. either. Be prepared for either.
I know, he's an alien from some other planet inhabited by drug addicts....hoping for a miracle.

(((((Huggs and prayers)))))