splendra

My mom is getting older. She still has my siblings and two of their kids living with her.

She called me up this morning obviously feeling rather blue saying she is afraid that she might get arrested and/or loose her home. Because my brother is dealing out of her house. She has repeatedly asked him to leave.

My brother seems to have lost all ability to care about anything or anyone. He was clean for over a year. When we went back out he fell fast and hard and he is much worse than ever before. I called the police on him a few weeks ago because my sister called and said he said he was going to kill her if she came out of her room and that mom and her son were outside afraid to come in. My brother has a violent streak that he tends to want to get in mom's face with. Of course my bother ran out the back and my mom told the police everything was alright when they showed up.

I know she must be scared. I think my sister is also violent with her. My sister has a child with a disability that my mom is very concerned about and does everything for and with him. I've asked my mom to get the help she needs. I don't know why she won't make him leave. DSS won't do anything cause I have called them before. I want to protect her but she won't let me. Just venting....

splendra

If you can please say a prayer for my mom to get a backbone

Done_With_It

You got it~

bigsister1982

Splendra,

I know exactly how you feel right now. The exact same situation is going on with me & my brother. He lives with my mom & dad, who know what's going on with him, but are understandably scared to kick him out. He's just out of his teens and never been on his own before.

We think he *MAY* be getting better, but of course, after years of lies, how do you know? Even though there are small signs, it's smarter to assume he's not getting better, just getting better at hiding. I'm terrified every day that my parents are going to get into legal trouble because of my idiot brother.

I panic at my answering machine beeping, I panic when my parents don't answer the phone. I'm sure you know a bit of what I am feeling. I'm seeing these two awesome parents that raised four children, three of them successful and independant, two university grads, one in the armed services. The last one... is the one still at home. I know they feel like they are responsible for helping my bro get better. I wish there was something I could say to make them understand that none of this is their fault.

My thoughts & prayers go out to you.

mooselips

Ah gee, I sure understand how you're feeling.

My mom has my sister, who is 66 living with her, and my sister is quite verbally abusive to my mother.

She doesn't want my sister to move back to Florida, or go to a retirement community, or any other option, cause then she'd have to leave her house..

She says, "I just ignore her, I can't hear very well anyway"

What REALLY ticked me off last week was that my sister got mad, and had the nerve to say to my mother..."12 years, I've been living here 12 years"

Which meant 12 years since my father died, and she expected my mother to die long before now...Grrr...

No respect, that's the problem.
Although I'm praying for your mom to say "enough is enough!"




Parents! Good grief!

lightseeker

Splendra -

So sorry to hear about this horrible situation. I will be sending up a lot of prayers for your mom and for your situation. She's lucky that she at least has you - it sounds like she has a lot on her plate.

Love and hugs

marle

My daughter's ex-abf's mom is a lot like yours. She is 60 and has three of her adult addict children living with her. She is the only one that works. I will send a prayer for your mom to not have to spend her golden years with a bunch of active addicts. Has she ever seen this forum. Hugs, Marle

cmc

I'll pray for mom to either make them leave or for another better solution to present itself. It must be so difficult knowing that she won't stand up for herself.

rahsue

<<<<<<<<<,hugs And Prayers For Mom>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

splendra

My mom is 73 I think she is too old to have to live this way my two brothers are in their50's my sis 40's. I am the only one not living off of my mom. I don't feel too proud about it either cause I think they ought to be taking care of her instead of making her life hell. My sister has said to me several times that she can't wait for her to die.

I feel sad for her. I want to call the law on my older brother and get him away from my mom. I know if I did there would be hell to pay and I have already paid enough hell for that bunch of people. I think I will have to detach if possible. Still it saddens me and probably makes me feel a little angry too.

Impurrfect

(((Splendra))))

Sending hugs and prayers to you and your mom. I know this has to be so hard to stand by and watch, but you can't help her if she doesn't want help.

Hugs and prayers!

Amy

hope213

i am sorry about your moms situation.is there anywhere else she can go. maybe if she left for awhile & the bills did not get paid they would leave on there own.prayers are being said for your mom & you too. i know this hurts you bad.

splendra

The house and bills of course are all in her name and it would be her loss if the bills did not get paid of course.

I wish she could come and stay with me but I just don't have the room for both her and my nephew and know she wouldn't go anywhere without him...

It is her jam and she is not willing to let go of anything. So she hangs on for a ride that she really does not deserve and I know guilt is what controls her.

She wants help but it has to be on her terms...

splendra

Well the police came and arrested my older brother and my sister. My mom is really upset over it and so is my nephew of course they had to wait until he came home from school and do it in front of him.

Well at least my brother is out of her house now...

ctrom40

Splendra,

Gosh what a mess!
My heart goes out to your poor Mom.

Well, hopefully.... this latest event will be a good thing.

Ann

Splendra, special hugs for you and a lot of prayers for your family. It's sad to see older people treated badly, but at least your mom is safe for now.

It's hard watching dysfunctional people when they are family or people we love.

Hugs

mooselips

Okay...hoping she doesn't take them back????

Maybe while they're gone, she could attend some meetings, and get some strength?


Hugs Splendra, you're a good daughter....

Impurrfect

(((Splendra)))

I'm sorry your mom and nephew are upset, but I think it's what needed to happen.

Continuing to send you and your family hugs and prayers!

Amy

splendra

I believe my mom is infinatly better off than she was but to try to convince her of that would probably take an act of Congress. So I ain't even going there with her maybe if they are gone long enough she will grow to enjoy the peace.

Ladybugg

(((Splendra))) I think I would have to ring his neck...how frustrating that must be to watch and know that there is nothing you can do about it.