question regarding treatment centers
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2008
Posts: 46
question regarding treatment centers
can you guys tell me, generally speaking, what happens during a 3-month stay at a treatment facility for alcohol addiction? Not an expensive one, and not a really cheap one, but one that middle class people would go to. My AB doesn't have insurance right now, but someone from his church is paying for his stay at this treatment facility that he is going to tomorrow. He's been detoxed since Friday and this facility didn't have a bed until Monday. I know each facility is probably different in what freedoms they allow and the program they follow, etc, but please try to tell me as much as you can. For instance, do they get a private room and a tv, are they generally cut off from contact from family and friends at first, what do they do in the course of a day, are they allowed internet and phone access, are they allowed to receive cards and letters in the mail, what kinds of things is he allowed to bring with him to the center, will he be back in touch with his sponsor in AA. and also, if he is not married (which we are not, we'd only been dating 4 months), is he encouraged to not have a personal relationship during this time, or IS he encouraged to keep the relationship if it was not detrimental to him. for instance, I have been a positive influence in his life, not someone that was dragging him down. I want to know what they will be doing for him as far as getting him ready for the real world again.
Last edited by triciafawn; 04-06-2008 at 10:51 AM.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Syracuse NY
Posts: 32
Rather than detail out how the rehab my AW went to worked. I'd suggest either checking to see if your's has a web site, they may answer your questions on a faq page, your are fairly typical questions. Or calling them directly, someone should be able to help you.
Also, for us the adimtion process included both of us there. I spent about 4 hours "checking" her in. A family councilor spent nearly an hour with me alone, answering any question I had.
Best wishes to both of you, it's a long road...but worth it!!!
Also, for us the adimtion process included both of us there. I spent about 4 hours "checking" her in. A family councilor spent nearly an hour with me alone, answering any question I had.
Best wishes to both of you, it's a long road...but worth it!!!
Member
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: London
Posts: 130
I can only speak about the UK but most have rules and regs and a timetable which is available from them in printed form.
He will get all of this before being admitted as he needs to sign that he agrees to it.
He will get all of this before being admitted as he needs to sign that he agrees to it.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2008
Posts: 46
thank you for all your replies, but I am not the one going. it is my boyfriend who is going, who hasn't called me since the day he went into detox. I've been getting updates from his family and his best friend, and I know that he leaves for a 3 month stay at a treatment facility in the morning. I haven't asked where he is going. I posted this thread to try to educate myself on what DOES happen at treatment centers, so I could know what he is going thru, and the parameters he will have.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Posts: 5,075
triciafawn, I know how hard this is for you. He hasn't contacted you since he went into detox. Why, then, spend time wondering what will happen there and if it means your relationship will continue? Right now, he doesn't seem to want one.
It's heartbreaking. I've been there. With the support of Al-Anon, therapy, our family doctor and SR, I learned to LET GO.
Sending you much love.
It's heartbreaking. I've been there. With the support of Al-Anon, therapy, our family doctor and SR, I learned to LET GO.
Sending you much love.
Yield beautiful changes
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: A home filled with love
Posts: 1,699
Hi, there.
My husband returned last week from an inpatient treatment facility for alcohol abuse. They took excellent care of him. He said it was a "physical prison, spiritual renewal."
I think that people need a lot of space to find renewal; it doesn't mean that he doesn't love you or that he doesn't think of you. He's just thinking a lot more about himself. This is as it should be.
Ideally, it will be the same for you. I know that you are frustrated by others' insistence that you take care of yourself (I've read your posts), but, speaking from experience, may I suggest that you take full advantage of this 3 month period to heal?
For me that came in the form of really letting myself feel the fear and pain that addiction brought to my life. It gave me time to examine my own flaws, to make some peace with myself, and to stop trying to predict the future. While my A was using I spent a lot of time pushing down those feelings because I thought that his pain was more important. With the addict out of the way, I could finally cease placing his needs above my own.
I'm wishing you peace.
-TC
My husband returned last week from an inpatient treatment facility for alcohol abuse. They took excellent care of him. He said it was a "physical prison, spiritual renewal."
I think that people need a lot of space to find renewal; it doesn't mean that he doesn't love you or that he doesn't think of you. He's just thinking a lot more about himself. This is as it should be.
Ideally, it will be the same for you. I know that you are frustrated by others' insistence that you take care of yourself (I've read your posts), but, speaking from experience, may I suggest that you take full advantage of this 3 month period to heal?
For me that came in the form of really letting myself feel the fear and pain that addiction brought to my life. It gave me time to examine my own flaws, to make some peace with myself, and to stop trying to predict the future. While my A was using I spent a lot of time pushing down those feelings because I thought that his pain was more important. With the addict out of the way, I could finally cease placing his needs above my own.
I'm wishing you peace.
-TC
Always hopeful...
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Illinois
Posts: 429
Think about YOU! Think about YOU!
Say this over and over! When he gets out and has a recovery period, see what happens. I find it discouraging he hasn't contacted you. Be strong! Think about YOU!
You can go to treatment sites and find info on treatment plans....it is tough on them. But, remember, just because they are there....doesn't mean it is helping YOUR life. K?
Say this over and over! When he gets out and has a recovery period, see what happens. I find it discouraging he hasn't contacted you. Be strong! Think about YOU!
You can go to treatment sites and find info on treatment plans....it is tough on them. But, remember, just because they are there....doesn't mean it is helping YOUR life. K?
Sunny Side Up
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Sth Australia
Posts: 3,802
Originally Posted by triciafawn 
can you guys tell me, generally speaking, what happens during a 3-month stay at a treatment facility for alcohol addiction? Not an expensive one, and not a really cheap one, but one that middle class people would go to.
This has been our experience in Australia. My ASister has been in several different types. It depends on the centre and the way their work it. Most are livein. Women and men separated but mix socially. Share rooms, buy own food, cook themselves, activities take place. Some let them go out during the day after a certain period and then some even let weekends at home. This caused disaster for her.
He's been detoxed since Friday and this facility didn't have a bed until Monday. I know each facility is probably different in what freedoms they allow and the program they follow, etc, but please try to tell me as much as you can. For instance, do they get a private room and a tv, are they generally cut off from contact from family and friends at first, what do they do in the course of a day, are they allowed internet and phone access, are they allowed to receive cards and letters in the mail, what kinds of things is he allowed to bring with him to the center, will he be back in touch with his sponsor in AA. and also, if he is not married (which we are not, we'd only been dating 4 months), is he encouraged to not have a personal relationship during this time, or IS he encouraged to keep the relationship if it was not detrimental to him.
Here detox is essential before admittance. Or detox centre before hand. This ensures awareness and medication prescribed. Family & friends can visit but not allowed in their rooms. We would go out for coffee or shopping. They had councelling and group sessions. Personal relationships are a touchy subject, they really need to concentrate on their recovery.
for instance, I have been a positive influence in his life, not someone that was dragging him down. I want to know what they will be doing for him as far as getting him ready for the real world again.
This has been our experience in Australia. My ASister has been in several different types. It depends on the centre and the way their work it. Most are livein. Women and men separated but mix socially. Share rooms, buy own food, cook themselves, activities take place. Some let them go out during the day after a certain period and then some even let weekends at home. This caused disaster for her.
He's been detoxed since Friday and this facility didn't have a bed until Monday. I know each facility is probably different in what freedoms they allow and the program they follow, etc, but please try to tell me as much as you can. For instance, do they get a private room and a tv, are they generally cut off from contact from family and friends at first, what do they do in the course of a day, are they allowed internet and phone access, are they allowed to receive cards and letters in the mail, what kinds of things is he allowed to bring with him to the center, will he be back in touch with his sponsor in AA. and also, if he is not married (which we are not, we'd only been dating 4 months), is he encouraged to not have a personal relationship during this time, or IS he encouraged to keep the relationship if it was not detrimental to him.
Here detox is essential before admittance. Or detox centre before hand. This ensures awareness and medication prescribed. Family & friends can visit but not allowed in their rooms. We would go out for coffee or shopping. They had councelling and group sessions. Personal relationships are a touchy subject, they really need to concentrate on their recovery.
for instance, I have been a positive influence in his life, not someone that was dragging him down. I want to know what they will be doing for him as far as getting him ready for the real world again.
Good Luck JJ
Retired Pro Drunk
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Saint Paul, MN
Posts: 901
It's impossible for me to say what it's like for him. Treatment centers (in the US at least) can vary widely in their rules and such. And they can also vary widely in how they treat patients via their particular program.
There really are no given facts that would govern all centers, except for the obvious - patients aren't allowed to drink.
Without knowing which center his is at and looking up their FAQ on their website or calling them up to ask, there's really no way to know.
I was in a five month program last summer/fall that was very open. Mail, phone calls, visiting allowed, no lockdowns... anywhere from 4 patients per room to single rooms, gender segregated. Their philosophy when it came to romantic relationships was that no new relationships recommended for the 1st year. Other than that, it varied individually.
My days went like this:
7:00 morning meditiation
7:30 breakfast
9:00 some sort of group (big book study, twelve step group, mental health issues groups, small group)
10:00 Lecture
11:00 large group where folks would present written assignments given to them by their counselors. Other patients would give feedback.
12:00 Lunch
1:00 Lecture
2-3 or 4 Usually some sort of recreation. Crafts, games, or folks would work on assignments.
3 or 4 to 5 was downtime
5 dinner
6 more groups/lecture
7 - rest and relaxation - one night per week we were taken to a local AA meeting.
We had no internet access. It wasn't a "lockdown" type of place. Anyone could walk out of there at any time (though once you left you usually couldn't come back).
I've heard of other treatment centers that are much more restrictive, they have bed checks, security, etc.
Not sure what else to tell you.
There really are no given facts that would govern all centers, except for the obvious - patients aren't allowed to drink.
Without knowing which center his is at and looking up their FAQ on their website or calling them up to ask, there's really no way to know.
I was in a five month program last summer/fall that was very open. Mail, phone calls, visiting allowed, no lockdowns... anywhere from 4 patients per room to single rooms, gender segregated. Their philosophy when it came to romantic relationships was that no new relationships recommended for the 1st year. Other than that, it varied individually.
My days went like this:
7:00 morning meditiation
7:30 breakfast
9:00 some sort of group (big book study, twelve step group, mental health issues groups, small group)
10:00 Lecture
11:00 large group where folks would present written assignments given to them by their counselors. Other patients would give feedback.
12:00 Lunch
1:00 Lecture
2-3 or 4 Usually some sort of recreation. Crafts, games, or folks would work on assignments.
3 or 4 to 5 was downtime
5 dinner
6 more groups/lecture
7 - rest and relaxation - one night per week we were taken to a local AA meeting.
We had no internet access. It wasn't a "lockdown" type of place. Anyone could walk out of there at any time (though once you left you usually couldn't come back).
I've heard of other treatment centers that are much more restrictive, they have bed checks, security, etc.
Not sure what else to tell you.
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