help maybe?
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 3
help maybe?
ok so things arnt going so hot at the moment
recently my sister died, and its hit me hard...
and i just want to escape from this horrid unbelievable reality
so i took 5 of my adhd meds (concerta)
and now i feel like
im not really here
just.. drifting...
my head feels heavy though
but like..
i feel... i dont know drifty and stuff
better.. but like... not really all there... bit loopy...
ive done this before and i really want to do it again i want to take more...
i dont know if this is the right place to put it...
but...
i just.. i feel so dependant at the moment on taking more and more
and im.. im sorta scared
i dont know...
recently my sister died, and its hit me hard...
and i just want to escape from this horrid unbelievable reality
so i took 5 of my adhd meds (concerta)
and now i feel like
im not really here
just.. drifting...
my head feels heavy though
but like..
i feel... i dont know drifty and stuff
better.. but like... not really all there... bit loopy...
ive done this before and i really want to do it again i want to take more...
i dont know if this is the right place to put it...
but...
i just.. i feel so dependant at the moment on taking more and more
and im.. im sorta scared
i dont know...
Member
Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 59
sarey...how did your sister die...I lost my sister too...we were very VERY close...she was 1 year older...she was 34 yrs old...Im sorry for your loss.
back to you & you abusing your med's
are you in recovery ? have you ever been in recovery ?
you are using / abusing...your not in active recovery...your in active addiction.
cut it out ! ...GET into recovery or come BACK to recovery...escape is temporary...when you come down from this "loopy high"...your sister will still be gone...and you will still miss and mourn her.
Honor her memory...do the next right thing.
miavin2
back to you & you abusing your med's
are you in recovery ? have you ever been in recovery ?
you are using / abusing...your not in active recovery...your in active addiction.
cut it out ! ...GET into recovery or come BACK to recovery...escape is temporary...when you come down from this "loopy high"...your sister will still be gone...and you will still miss and mourn her.
Honor her memory...do the next right thing.
miavin2
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 3
my sister had lupus...
she wasnt my blood related sister, but we were so close... she called me little sidder... god i miss her so much...
im very sorry for your loss too....
ive never been in recovery...
i used to abuse alcohol, but thats whenever i got my hands on it, i used to binge drink alot but im trying to stop that now
im fifteen years old by the way...
i used to abuse tablets, like, taking way too many, jsut a bunch of them, just to.. escape, i dont know...
i just... i dotn know, sorry... i just dont know what to do and i dont want to get addicted to this... i feel already dependant on taking loads each eevry day just to get this high i feel right now...
she wasnt my blood related sister, but we were so close... she called me little sidder... god i miss her so much...
im very sorry for your loss too....
ive never been in recovery...
i used to abuse alcohol, but thats whenever i got my hands on it, i used to binge drink alot but im trying to stop that now
im fifteen years old by the way...
i used to abuse tablets, like, taking way too many, jsut a bunch of them, just to.. escape, i dont know...
i just... i dotn know, sorry... i just dont know what to do and i dont want to get addicted to this... i feel already dependant on taking loads each eevry day just to get this high i feel right now...
Member
Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 59
sorry to sound parental and bossy...but you need to go talk to your parents about this...if they are worth their weight in salt...they will listen and help you to get help...sounds to me like you could benefit from recovery...but you need to take some real simple steps first.
( realizing that this place is a place for addicts who are trying live in recovery )
1. admit that you have a problem to yourself and your folks
2. seek help from professionals and your doctor about this abusing ADHD meds...I was prescribed meds for this when I was kid...they can be dangerous...as anything can...when abused.
3. be careful about going around to these websites and giving info out about yourself...like your age...etc etc ...
clearly you need help and you should talk to your parents and Doctor about all this ASAP.
miavin2
( realizing that this place is a place for addicts who are trying live in recovery )
1. admit that you have a problem to yourself and your folks
2. seek help from professionals and your doctor about this abusing ADHD meds...I was prescribed meds for this when I was kid...they can be dangerous...as anything can...when abused.
3. be careful about going around to these websites and giving info out about yourself...like your age...etc etc ...
clearly you need help and you should talk to your parents and Doctor about all this ASAP.
miavin2
Member
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: colorado springs
Posts: 123
Yeah, couldnt agree more with miavins advice- you need to include your parents in this, I know you think they will probably blow up about it, but in the long run they can provide the help and support that you need to beat this.
You don't ever want to become a slave to these things, and that's how prescription meds made me feel- like I couldnt get along without them.
Just wanted to clarify, too, that you are not actively suicidal, or at least that this taking of 5 pills, then wanting more is not a suicidal gesture, because those would be two different problems, to be handled two different ways, savvy? As in a more urgent and rapid intervention if you are just trying to end it all.
You don't ever want to become a slave to these things, and that's how prescription meds made me feel- like I couldnt get along without them.
Just wanted to clarify, too, that you are not actively suicidal, or at least that this taking of 5 pills, then wanting more is not a suicidal gesture, because those would be two different problems, to be handled two different ways, savvy? As in a more urgent and rapid intervention if you are just trying to end it all.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 59
listen to these people whove never met you
great suggestions to you sarey...by all here...dont let them go to waste...and dont put it off...and thanx for the "clarify" / " savvy " peach... ( I savvy ! )
sarey if you think you are toying with "hurting yourself" ideas ...action now is most important.
you are grieving...mourning...probably depressed....I am still grieving the loss of my sis...my Dad ...my Mom...one after the over the last 8 years...my Mom just recently this last DEC...before Christmas... your head and your heart are wired together...and they can be a potent combo...now throw in some drugs !...you've got a S*#T storm brewin.
get help...toot sweet !
Mv2
sarey if you think you are toying with "hurting yourself" ideas ...action now is most important.
you are grieving...mourning...probably depressed....I am still grieving the loss of my sis...my Dad ...my Mom...one after the over the last 8 years...my Mom just recently this last DEC...before Christmas... your head and your heart are wired together...and they can be a potent combo...now throw in some drugs !...you've got a S*#T storm brewin.
get help...toot sweet !
Mv2
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 3
i appreciate ur replies...
blah a friend of mine called posion control nd they sed go to a&e asap and tht i could have a heartattack or a stroke or a seizure
nd all i wanted to do was make reality go away!
but well apparently that amoutn was lethal nd they are still sayin to go to hosp because im still at risk
but. i cant. ill get sectioned into a psych ward
(ive a history of many suicide attempts.. thats why im scared to tell anybody, theyll think i do it to kill myself, when most of the time i dont...)
but well, i just rested in bed
couple of times it fetl like my heart stopped
now im just shaky, got a bad headache thats been with me since i took it, my heart... u can see it beating through my jumper, and u know where ur veins are on ur neck? that pulse? its visable, nd its scary cuz it goes too quick then it goes too slow nd when its too slow i can barely breathe but when its too quick i feel dizzy and stuff
couple of chest pains
but
sigh.
i dont know
i have to go to school soon though
i cant
i cant let anyone know
i just cant
im so scared.
but i want help.
because right now i want to take more.
i want to take more than ive already took.
argh.. :/
blah a friend of mine called posion control nd they sed go to a&e asap and tht i could have a heartattack or a stroke or a seizure
nd all i wanted to do was make reality go away!
but well apparently that amoutn was lethal nd they are still sayin to go to hosp because im still at risk
but. i cant. ill get sectioned into a psych ward
(ive a history of many suicide attempts.. thats why im scared to tell anybody, theyll think i do it to kill myself, when most of the time i dont...)
but well, i just rested in bed
couple of times it fetl like my heart stopped
now im just shaky, got a bad headache thats been with me since i took it, my heart... u can see it beating through my jumper, and u know where ur veins are on ur neck? that pulse? its visable, nd its scary cuz it goes too quick then it goes too slow nd when its too slow i can barely breathe but when its too quick i feel dizzy and stuff
couple of chest pains
but
sigh.
i dont know
i have to go to school soon though
i cant
i cant let anyone know
i just cant
im so scared.
but i want help.
because right now i want to take more.
i want to take more than ive already took.
argh.. :/
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Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: somewhere
Posts: 917
Sraey,I know you are scared.It's not easy to lose a sister especially that you're under the influence of drugs.I think you should go to ER asap just to make sure that you're ok.
Don't ignore these signs.They're are telling you that something is wrong and that your heart may stop.I don't think that you want that right or else you wouldn't be here.You won't gain her back if something bad happened to you.Go now to the hospital .Don't delay it.You might be perfectly healthy and nothing is wrong with you.It's always better to be safe than sorry.Tell them what you are telling us.They will know that this is not a suicide attempt.They are professionals and they will know the difference.
It's completely natural to feel scared and afraid.You are mourning your sister.There's nothing wrong with that.It's just that you have to find a way to express your feelings in a safe way.You are probably feeling lonely but you don't have to face all that burden alone.You can start by talking to a friend or any adult you can trust.Taking more pills is never a sloution.It will only numb your pain.Your heart right now won't tolerate more pils.IT will kill you.
IF YOU ARE FEELING SUICIDAL,TELL SOMEONE NOW.They will help you and understand you.Call any hotline.You'll find some help in the above threads.Try to contact any of these numbers.Remember you never have to walk thtough this alone.Be careful and be safe.
Love and Hugs
Jane
couple of times it fetl like my heart stopped
now im just shaky, got a bad headache thats been with me since i took it, my heart... u can see it beating through my jumper, and u know where ur veins are on ur neck? that pulse? its visable, nd its scary cuz it goes too quick then it goes too slow nd when its too slow i can barely breathe but when its too quick i feel dizzy and stuff
couple of chest pains
now im just shaky, got a bad headache thats been with me since i took it, my heart... u can see it beating through my jumper, and u know where ur veins are on ur neck? that pulse? its visable, nd its scary cuz it goes too quick then it goes too slow nd when its too slow i can barely breathe but when its too quick i feel dizzy and stuff
couple of chest pains
It's completely natural to feel scared and afraid.You are mourning your sister.There's nothing wrong with that.It's just that you have to find a way to express your feelings in a safe way.You are probably feeling lonely but you don't have to face all that burden alone.You can start by talking to a friend or any adult you can trust.Taking more pills is never a sloution.It will only numb your pain.Your heart right now won't tolerate more pils.IT will kill you.
IF YOU ARE FEELING SUICIDAL,TELL SOMEONE NOW.They will help you and understand you.Call any hotline.You'll find some help in the above threads.Try to contact any of these numbers.Remember you never have to walk thtough this alone.Be careful and be safe.
Love and Hugs
Jane
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