angeldancer

(i posted this in the mental health forum too, but i'm not sure if thats the right place, not even sure if this is the right place.... i'm sorry )

ok, so i haven't been here for a while. a couple of years, i first came to the website while in recovery from cocaine. now here i am,

about a year ago i started having chronic pain, i've had surgerys and tests and no one seems to know whats going on, now all the time i smoke weed to deal with the pain. i've been out of work and bed ridden every day since november. seen doctor after doctor, and now the only thing my doctor has to say is that i'm over reacting and that i'm just a depressed hypocondriac.

i'm not new to this whole depression deal, when i was 15 (i'm 20 now) i was admitted to a psyche ward twice. and now i have this doctor talking to me as if i've never heard of it before.

so she started perscribing me all these ****** up pills, all of them just left me in a fog. the last appointment i had was on wednesday and i basically lost it. i told her that the problem wasn't in my head, i told her straight up i didn't want any more anti depressants, that i wanted her to deal with my chronic pain but she won't. she keeps telling me its all in my head and its not.


so here i am, in bed day in day out, in too much pain to drive or work or do anything. i'm not going to say i'm happy, i am depressed but only because i can't function anymore.


basically on wednesday i told my doctor to **** off, i got pissed off and angry, its all so frustrating. i canceled the rest of my "check ups" with her.


so, to get to the point of all of this, what am i supposed to do? i can't keep smoking weed like this, and if i quit, how can i deal with the pain? how am i supposed to function?


i'm sorry for such a long rant, i don't even know if this post belongs here but i'm at such a loss. how am i supposed to get better?



thanks for listening, i'm sorry if its in the wrong place...



Robyn

Sugah

What kind of chronic pain do you have, Robyn? That's a pretty general term.

Being a chronic pain sufferer myself, I found that after awhile, pot amplified rather than eased pain.

Peace & Love,
Sugah

serenityqueen

We don't give medical advice but like Sugah asked, what kind of pain are you having?

I have Lupus and Rheumatoid Arthritis and it took a long time for them to be diagnosed. In the mean time, I became a full blown addict. I know the frustration of someone saying it's all in our heads.

I told docs they'd be depressed too feeling as bad as I did.

Hang in there. There is hope.

I'm living proof as well as hundreds of others on SR alone
:ghug3

ksos

Robyn...

I agree with all the issues the other members here have mentioned. You are essentially "self prescribing" by smoking marijuana, but I can almost understand why you are in this situation. By cussing your doctors out and not really focusing on your pain, you are, in effect, not focusing on the very true issue of your pain--which, like the others said, you have yet to describe or truly explore here.

Have you ever asked your physician(s) about a pain management assessment? Smoking weed is not the way to go, obviously, as your pain has not gone away and you say that you are unable to function.

One other issue. You admit to having a history of substance abuse with cocaine. Are your treating MDs aware of this?

Like our fellow members, I am also a chronic pain patient and have to go to my clinic every two weeks simply because I recently told my MD that I was abusing the medication I was getting from him. Now, I have been placed on a pretty severe methodone monitoring treatment plan myself and it might be the best thing that ever happened to me.

As addicts, we need to look at our own perception of pain and how we first look to escape from it. You choose marijuana, I chose to take double my dose and take other drugs to amplify the effect of the Pain medication, and I am certain that other folks who actually do have very real pain, have sought pain relief through other means which were not called for.

Be a responsible patient and reasonably discuss the pain you are in with your MD. If you self prescribe, like you are doing with the weed, than your doctor cannot help you. Get that $h-t out of your system, so you will be able to receive the proper care you need,

ccgirl2

One of the symptoms of depression can be chronic, vague pain which can't be diagnosed with any tests. I don't know which antidepressant you're on right now, but maybe ask your doctor about Cymbalta (I've never taken it, so this isn't medical advice)

Other than that, I'd switch doctors and find one that is more sympathetic.

sugarssweetpea

Maybe ask your doctor about fibromyalgia (sp). I have a friend who has it & it is pretty painful.