obsessed

Lauren has an appointment today to the surgeon who amputated her finger and last weeks appointment with another doctor was a disaster so I am sure that todays visit will be the same but I am hoping that I will be treated a little better but who knows!!! I have not talked to Lauren very much at all in the last week, she has texted a few times and I have gotten to the point that I don't answer her very often. I just don't have much to say to her right now. She called Saturday night for money and that pisses me off!! I told her NO!! If she wants to live out on her own she needs to support herself. My mother who still believes what Lauren tells her has not been speaking to me last week and it seems this week also has been giving her money and does not seem to understand what I am trying to do is still giving and bending over backwards for her. I tried to tell her that after everything we have done and has happened including losing half of her index finger has not stopped her and until she comes to me to tell me she wants help that I am not doing anymore for Lauren, but it falls on deaf ears!!!

grateful2b

Obsessed, I am sorry your mother continues to enable your daughter...but I am so glad you are establishing boundaries for you...even tho it doesn't seem that way now, Lauren is watching, and what 'you do' still matters even if it is not what she wants at the moment.........you are doing the hard thing but the right thing...you should be proud of yourself....good for you ....

and as far as the doctor goes, remember, 'if they haven't walked in your shoes, they don't get to have an opinion'.....

caileesnana

If you are like me, you are second guessing yourself do to what your mom is doing. YOU ARE doing the right thing, the only thing that is proven to work! We become "insane" as our kids, maybe worse! Those from our parents generation do not get it..imagine if it is this hard for us, how it must be for our parents!!

Don't give up on you!!
love and prayers,
susan

BayAreaPhoenix

You are being the best Mom! Don't ever doubt that. Your Mom had you, and I'm guessing she may be using that as her yardstick. It's too bad and I'm sure it's frustrating that your Mom does not get it, but just know you are doing what you know is the right thing! Your actions for your daughter are the most important.

Kudos again to all you parents walking this most painful and difficult path! The strength and courage it takes must be at times overwhelming, but know that you are doing the right thing! :ghug3

Chino

It isn't falling on deaf ears, she hears you loud and clear because she's taken matters into her own hands. What's happening is that she doesn't agree with the path you've chosen.

If it feels like she's undermining you, remember that she isn't. Your path is for you.

marle

Sending some hugs. You can't force your mom to get it anymore than other people could force you. You just keep doing the next right thing for you. Your mom will reach her bottom with Lauren too. Hugs, Marle

sleepygoat

Good for you for setting the boundaries you have. Must be really frustrating that your own mom can't seem to 'get it' too. But I betcha she eventually will. Addicts wear out there enablers.
I also, for myself, draw the line at medical stuff. If I would assist my kid to get medical help if she wasn't using, I will do the same when she is. So good for you again.