I have backed off...
Spaede
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: SD
Posts: 18
I have backed off...
I posted before about a gal I was involved with that became sober after a year and a half of dating. Soon after (five months) she told me that she could not be my everything at this point in her ecovery. At first I took this very personal. Although I am very happy she is getting help, cause she was a terriable person when she drank. After being seperated for a couple of months and talking a little here and there, she came back to tell me that she does not need someone else if she has me and wanted to take things slow. But few weeks later she relapsed and backed off again. Now I know that she is dealing with recovery, moving out from her dads, and trying to find a job, not to mention other issues of hers, but it hurt when she backed off again, she told me that it was not me she was just dealing with alot of things... So I guess I will back off and respect her space, she seems to respect me more.
I am continuing to go to Alanon.
What happens to them when the relapse, and info would be great
Thanks
Brad
I am continuing to go to Alanon.
What happens to them when the relapse, and info would be great
Thanks
Brad
Belgian Sheepdog Adictee
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: In Today
Posts: 6,101
Well Brad, I am glad to see you still posting, this is great.
As to your girlfriend. Since she is in very early recovery, I can pretty well say she has no idea what she does or doesn't want!!!!! She is confused, has no real idea about herself, is in no shape to make any decision about any type of relationship.
Please continue to not only attend alanon, but learn how to apply the Principals of Alanon in your OWN life. Not only will she have to learn how to maintain sobriety, she will then have a long road of 'looking within' and learning about herself. You can do the same.
We all work recovery One Day At A Time. I had just turned 3 years sober, was married to an alkie that was a bit over 5 years sober and my sponsor STRONGLY suggested that I start attending Alanon IMMEDIATELY. Well I gulped, but I did what she said.
Alanon has helped me tremendously in not only working with my AA sponsees, other recovering and practicing alkies and/or addicts that come into my life, but people in general.
If it is meant to be somewhere down the line it will be, if not it won't, but please don't waste today, and miss the 'good' things about today because you mind and being are on what might or might not be. That would be a tragic waste for you.
Please keep posting, let us know how YOU are doing, we do care very much!!!
Love and hugs,
As to your girlfriend. Since she is in very early recovery, I can pretty well say she has no idea what she does or doesn't want!!!!! She is confused, has no real idea about herself, is in no shape to make any decision about any type of relationship.
Please continue to not only attend alanon, but learn how to apply the Principals of Alanon in your OWN life. Not only will she have to learn how to maintain sobriety, she will then have a long road of 'looking within' and learning about herself. You can do the same.
We all work recovery One Day At A Time. I had just turned 3 years sober, was married to an alkie that was a bit over 5 years sober and my sponsor STRONGLY suggested that I start attending Alanon IMMEDIATELY. Well I gulped, but I did what she said.
Alanon has helped me tremendously in not only working with my AA sponsees, other recovering and practicing alkies and/or addicts that come into my life, but people in general.
If it is meant to be somewhere down the line it will be, if not it won't, but please don't waste today, and miss the 'good' things about today because you mind and being are on what might or might not be. That would be a tragic waste for you.
Please keep posting, let us know how YOU are doing, we do care very much!!!
Love and hugs,
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