Lin

Ten years ago I was attending some family sessions at a rehab near here. The instructor was talking about Adult Children. He told how many of us have a certain sound, song, food, person...who we just can't tolerate and it even makes us ill. He said something will trigger the memeories and we are just as sick about it as we were as a child.

I had heard the phrase "trace it, face it and erase it.". I decided to use that on a problem I have with buttermilk. If i smell it i gag to the point of vomiting. It a person at a table near me has a strong ranch dressing, I sometimes have to move. I could not even eat a biscuit at Hardees because i knew it had buttermilk in it. I could not cook with it...could not pour a glass for anybody...I'd get sick. It was what I called a severe aversion.

I traced it. I remembered that when my dad would drink, he often would also drink buttermilk. Then he might want me to drink it with him...and get mad when I woudl not. he would want to hug me or give me a kiss...or dance with me. the mixture of the whisky breath and the buttermilk was totally sickening to a young child and it has stayed with me. I faced it by telling myself he's gone. He won't breathe buttermilk on me again. I won't be resenting that my mom was passed out and I was having to deal with his buttermilk breath.

Today I am not ready to DRINK it...but at least I can sit by a person with ranch dressing without moving to another table. I am able to eat a Hardees biscuit even knowing there is buttermilk in it.

My younger sister has a similar aversion to drinking regular water. I am sure it was a similar situation...like she wanted coke and had to cry and was forced to drink water. She can barely sip enough water to swallow an aspirin before she gags.

It may be a song...lima beans...even a color or a certain kind of chair. We all may have something like this we dont understand. I jsut felt like sharing how I dealt with mine.

LIN

journeygal

HI Lin,

I have a similar story, but mine is the total opposite. My dad hates rice and while growing up, if my dad ever saw me eating rice I would get in so much trouble! So what happened? I became a rice addict - LOL! When I left home I used to practically eat rice with every meal - I couldn't get enough of it!!! I only recently stopped eating so much of it - 15 years later.

I do have an aversion to grape kool-aid. During his vodka years, dad insisted that we only make grape kool-aid - no other flavor or we would get in trouble. Of course now I've grown beyond drinking kool-aid , but just the sight of it (just grape) brings back horrible memories.

SoTired

Hi Lin,

I am not sure if this is the same type of situation, but I get ill whenever I see those wheat and cheese packaged crackers in the supermarket - the ones that come in single serving 6 packs.

When I was 12 we were living out of our car and had no food, so someone had given my mother a case of those crackers and that was all we had to eat for a long time. Now I can at least stomach seeing them in the store, but I will never ever eat them ... it used to affect me much worse.

Funny, now that I think about it ... my mother used to make me have a drink with her sometimes. She would beg and beg me, and occasionally I would give in and sip so that she would leave me alone. It was vodka and diet coke. Maybe I can thank her for the reason I never became an alcoholic myself?!

Kelly

Lin

thanks JG and Kelly! That sounds like what I was talking about...it amazed me to figure out how long I had those feelings.

Good to hear from you!
LIN

lyn_blossom78

Wow, Lin, you really made me think!

I guess as far as food goes, oatmeal would be my "food". We always had to eat what was on our plate, and oatmeal is cheap, so we had oatmeal. Now I didn't like it too much to begin with, but now I really can't stand it! I refuse to eat it, except in oatmeal cookie dough, which is NOT the same thing as slimy oatmeal in a bowl with milk, and WAY too much sugar to cover up the taste!

There are other things, though--I can hardly stand to hear the sound of one of those metal lighters with the flip top. The sound of the top flipping sets me on edge. Once when I was in high school, after I was put in foster care, I was selling booster bars in an apartment complex, and one apartment door was cracked open. I knocked on the door, and I heard someone's lighter click really loud. I KNEW it was my bio-dad in there, and I was so filled with fear, that I flew out of that apartment complex! Scared me to death! I have better control over it now, but it stills sends shivers down my spine.

Now, the sound of my husbands diesel truck, and the sound of his ice smashing down to the bottom of his glass when he's drinking does it too. Just sets me on edge.

Lyn

Lin

thanks Lyn...oatmeal sounds like a big triger for the feelings for you. I hope many of you are able to "trace it...face it ...and erase it...". Like I said, i wont DRINK buttermilk today, but I can at least sit next to somebody who is. BIG improvement! 20 years ago i woudl have gagged and vomited if I had to smell it for long.

LIN

ODAT

Green veggies like green beans or peas.

Bad, bad memories. Was force fed them and now cant even get them in the mouth without the gag-reflex happening. Just bad memories all around.

Not sure if I really can or want to go through the process of remembering them and erasing them though.

I can eat them 'in' something so long as the smell and sight is well and truly covered. And maybe this isn't really cool, or maybe its just not time yet......but maybe I figure some things are just best left alone. And I don't HAVE to eat peas anymore.

I'm all growed up.