queenteree

Below is a story I posted on my myspace blog. It made me feel better and I'd thought I'd share.

Well, the time has come to finally follow another fork in the road of life. I was on one road for many, many happy years. It was called ****(my last name) Road w/beautiful scenery, plenty of food and water along the way, family, laughter and happiness. I traveled that road with the love of my life, AH. Then a few years ago, against my better judgment, AH asked me if I would bear to the left and travel down a slightly different path, one that could still offer us beautiful scenery, plenty of food and water, family, laughter and happiness but would also offer AH another thing, it would offer him a chance to "relax" and "enjoy life" and "forget about worries" at least for a little bit. It offered AH alcohol.

Boy, we did have fun, AH and I. We were hanging and laughing and enjoying life. We were even closer than we'd ever been. This road was a great road. Even better than the first road. We traveled looking forward to each new adventure, and there were many. Unfortunately, there was a detour. It was a junction at Liver Lane and Misery Lane. We had no choice, the road we were on was closed, and we had to travel this detour if we wanted to continue, or we could go all the way back and go back to the first road, **** Road, we traveled without alcohol for AH. I begged AH to turn around and let's continue back, all the way back to the first road. Then we should be OK. I didn't like the looks of the detours, and was scared. AH refused. He was having too much fun. It's only a detour, let's just take it and we'll be back on the right road in no time. Against my better judgment, AH wanted to take Liver Lane. Liver Lane was full of pain, suffering and confusion, along with alot of sadness, and through it all, they still served alcohol. Liver Lane eventually lead to Misery Lane, where along with the pain, confusion, suffering and sadness we met with on Liver Lane, there was lying, doubt, chaos and much mental anguish and arguments, pure misery on Misery Lane, hence the name. Misery Lane looked like a very long road, a road without end, or possibly a "dead" end. I could not travel this road any longer and begged AH to please, please turn back. At first, he agreed and we started heading back, but when I wasn't looking, he would turn around and head the wrong way again. Again, I would go looking for him, find him and plead with him, "let's head back". Something happened along the way and AH decided that even though he had a chance to go back to **** Road, a road full of happiness, fun, laughter, family, beautiful scenery, plenty of food and water, he wanted to continue on Misery Lane, even though it was a terribly deserted road with either no end in sight or a "dead" end, can't tell until you get there. I could not travel that road. With a heavy heart, I chose to head back, or at least away from Misery Lane without AH. I don't exactly know my way back, and I am scared, but I know I eventually will find the road I am looking for. I know I can never go back to **** Road, that road is gone forever, washed out by tears, but I can find Happiness Lane. I think it's somewhere between Clarity Road and Serenity Circle.

I'll keep you posted on my journey and hope to see you all along the way.

sugarpup

thanks queenteree! I'm crying my eyes out now... you've hit the nail on the head, and just when I thought I was alone with my troubles and so confused, it's so nice to know that someone else, a lot of us unfortunatley, have experienced this horrible jouney too... thanks for putting it so eloquently and concisely!