Day 24 and struggling (is this normal?)
61'st day sober as of:12/18/07
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Casper, Wyoming U.S.
Posts: 241
Day 24 and struggling (is this normal?)
Hi everyone
I am now on day 24 of my sobriety (and of quitting smoking) but as grateful as I am to be sober again after over a year of drinking a case of beer every other day, I must say that I am not doing/feeling so well lately and it has me puzzled because I thought you were supposed to feel fantastic this far out (ie; the "pink cloud" effect, etc).
Day one and two I was just really hungover (everyone knows what that's like)
Day 4 was pure HELL!
Days 5, 6, 7, 8 and 9 were a struggle but tolerable (some depression though).
Days 10-15 I actually felt wonderful for the first time in ages.
Days 15 and ongoing have been absolutely miserable with severe depression, apathy, complete lack of motivation, low libido, foggy head, etc.
To make matters even worse is the fact that just recently (within the past 3-4 days) the cravings have returned along with worsened depression and other symptoms.
I have to admit that there are times when I find myself thinking that all I have to do is buy a case of beer and all of these bad feelings along with the miserable depression would go away almost instantly - because that's exactly the way it always worked before and yet I know that if I took even a sip of beer, it would lead to a total relapse, health problems and the next time it would be even more difficult to quit.
I guess I'm just wondering...does this sound like the normal/usual symptoms for someone who is 24 days into their sobriety or am I just one strange duck?. Also, outside of some "magic potion" is there anything I can take (or anything I can do) to make these horrible feelings go away?. I have side effects to SSRI's and I am already "keeping busy" to get my mind off of things.
- Thanks again for any input, Need4change
I am now on day 24 of my sobriety (and of quitting smoking) but as grateful as I am to be sober again after over a year of drinking a case of beer every other day, I must say that I am not doing/feeling so well lately and it has me puzzled because I thought you were supposed to feel fantastic this far out (ie; the "pink cloud" effect, etc).
Day one and two I was just really hungover (everyone knows what that's like)
Day 4 was pure HELL!
Days 5, 6, 7, 8 and 9 were a struggle but tolerable (some depression though).
Days 10-15 I actually felt wonderful for the first time in ages.
Days 15 and ongoing have been absolutely miserable with severe depression, apathy, complete lack of motivation, low libido, foggy head, etc.
To make matters even worse is the fact that just recently (within the past 3-4 days) the cravings have returned along with worsened depression and other symptoms.
I have to admit that there are times when I find myself thinking that all I have to do is buy a case of beer and all of these bad feelings along with the miserable depression would go away almost instantly - because that's exactly the way it always worked before and yet I know that if I took even a sip of beer, it would lead to a total relapse, health problems and the next time it would be even more difficult to quit.
I guess I'm just wondering...does this sound like the normal/usual symptoms for someone who is 24 days into their sobriety or am I just one strange duck?. Also, outside of some "magic potion" is there anything I can take (or anything I can do) to make these horrible feelings go away?. I have side effects to SSRI's and I am already "keeping busy" to get my mind off of things.
- Thanks again for any input, Need4change
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,514
Recovery is definitely not a straight line. I never experienced the pink cloud effect, because I was too bummed out with guilt. The cravings are probably kicking in because your body and mind are realizing that you are serious about this and they intend to fight back. There will always be ups and downs and as long as you can recognize the addict voice for what it is, you'll be okay.
A SeaBird Living LandLocked
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Smack Dab Right in the Middle of the U.S.A.
Posts: 238
Yep, sounds Normal to me and I went through that 4 times. I have now 15 years of sobriety and that what you are describing was just about what I experienced too. But I didn't try to quit smoking any of those times until at least the 6 month mark. You are going through ENOUGH right now with no alcohol. THAT in itself is a Major battle and if smoking helps you get through it then put off quitting for a bit. You don't really NEED the added stress of trying to quit smoking until you are a little more sure footed in your sobriety. Do any and everything that you can at this point to "Comfort" yourself. Don't ADD to the load you are carrying by removing Nicotine from your system at the same time OR get the patch and slap one on everyday if you feel you MUST quit.
Here is what I did last time.
Quit drinking.
At 6 Month anniversary THEN quit smoking.
At One year anniversary decided to lose some weight.
All worked out pretty well but don't try to do EVERYTHING at once, it's just TOO much stress and might land you back in the bottle.
Best of Luck.
Here is what I did last time.
Quit drinking.
At 6 Month anniversary THEN quit smoking.
At One year anniversary decided to lose some weight.
All worked out pretty well but don't try to do EVERYTHING at once, it's just TOO much stress and might land you back in the bottle.
Best of Luck.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2007
Posts: 38
Hi Need4change,
I'm only one week sober, and I can tell you that I drank to rid myself of the non-ending unhappy thoughts and depression that were torturing me day and night.
Those unhappy thoughts haven't gone away just because I have decided to stop drinking. But--this time, I want to stay sober more than I want to drink, so I am willing to deal with whatever I need to in order to make it work.
I think sharing your pain and getting it out of yourself is really helpful--at least it is for me. That's why AA is so successful; everyone helps everyone else get through what ya just have to get through. I believe that life will be very bright on the other side of it, and I want to go there!
Keep the faith. We can do this.
Peace to you,
Cekiya
I'm only one week sober, and I can tell you that I drank to rid myself of the non-ending unhappy thoughts and depression that were torturing me day and night.
Those unhappy thoughts haven't gone away just because I have decided to stop drinking. But--this time, I want to stay sober more than I want to drink, so I am willing to deal with whatever I need to in order to make it work.
I think sharing your pain and getting it out of yourself is really helpful--at least it is for me. That's why AA is so successful; everyone helps everyone else get through what ya just have to get through. I believe that life will be very bright on the other side of it, and I want to go there!
Keep the faith. We can do this.
Peace to you,
Cekiya
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Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Worcester
Posts: 789
You gave up drinking AND smoking at the same time? I commend your intentions but this sounds very difficult. Far be it from me to recommend against stopping smoking at this point, but you might want to consider what the more immediate life-threatening illness is. For me it was definitely drinking.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: FRIENDSWOOD, TEXAS
Posts: 500
I am on 24 or 25 days, and I understand what you are going through , I went through detox and have been taking medications to help with anxiety so that is helping but still having symptoms and besided drinking I was also taking xanax, and i dont even think about drinking I did try to drink a couple of times and it just made me sick so I just remember how sick I got and it is not even bothering me not to drink, I dontknow if it is the meds I am taking or what but I have lost the urge to drink it didnt taste good like I remembered and I didnt feel anything from it and it just made me sick to the point that I would throw it up after wards.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: baltimore, maryland
Posts: 463
Hi Need4,
The same thing has happened to me in the past. A couple of weeks feeling good in recovery then BAM!!! My first thought was always to get a bottle and start the fight the next day...But it doesn't work all that well, does it? I did some research and found a snydrome which occurs in some of us...It is called P.A.W.S. ---Post Acute Withdrawl Syndrome. If you goggle it you will find all kinds of info...or someone here might be along with a link......
After I read up on it, I started to understand what was happening to me....The symtoms usually show up between 2 wks to 6 mths after you stop consumption....Hope this helps...
Work Hard and Enjoy Life......Ned
The same thing has happened to me in the past. A couple of weeks feeling good in recovery then BAM!!! My first thought was always to get a bottle and start the fight the next day...But it doesn't work all that well, does it? I did some research and found a snydrome which occurs in some of us...It is called P.A.W.S. ---Post Acute Withdrawl Syndrome. If you goggle it you will find all kinds of info...or someone here might be along with a link......
After I read up on it, I started to understand what was happening to me....The symtoms usually show up between 2 wks to 6 mths after you stop consumption....Hope this helps...
Work Hard and Enjoy Life......Ned
Member
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Yankton, South Dakota
Posts: 23
i will have one month tomorrow so i know what you are going through. do you go to an AA or support group? it really helps me to stay focused and keep staying clean and sober. now thats amazing that you quit smoking at the same time because i could never do that...i guess that what we are feeling is normal??? i hate it but it is, i though WOW i feel soo good and the smack, it hit me in the face like a huge truck and i feel like it put me in a deep hole...keep foucsed and you can do it, find support!!!!
Follow Directions!
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Fredericksburg, Va.
Posts: 9,730
need4change what you are going through is normal, I will share with you what one of the senior research scientist/doctors adviced me when I went to him, he told me that alcoholism was enough of a beast to tackle alone, adding not smoking to the mix might make it impossible for me to stay sober. He advised to become solid in my sobriety before I quit smoking.
Well I have been solid for months now and my one year anniversary date will be day one for me quitting smoking.
What made all the difference in the world for me was AA and working the steps with a sponsor, the need/urge to drink was lifted from me long before I finished working the steps with my sponsor.
Before I went to AA and started working the steps I was a drunk whether I was drinking or not!
In order to stay stopped and be happy I found that the only way I was able to do that was through AA.
I tried for 10 years to quit my way and failed, once I was able to draw upon the Experience, Strength, & Hope of rooms full of happy sober alcoholics who had blazed the way to sobeity for me via AA I too have become Happy & sober.
Well I have been solid for months now and my one year anniversary date will be day one for me quitting smoking.
What made all the difference in the world for me was AA and working the steps with a sponsor, the need/urge to drink was lifted from me long before I finished working the steps with my sponsor.
Before I went to AA and started working the steps I was a drunk whether I was drinking or not!
In order to stay stopped and be happy I found that the only way I was able to do that was through AA.
I tried for 10 years to quit my way and failed, once I was able to draw upon the Experience, Strength, & Hope of rooms full of happy sober alcoholics who had blazed the way to sobeity for me via AA I too have become Happy & sober.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: London
Posts: 345
Hi Need4change
I think it has been said already but I dont think its anything unusual what you are experiencing. Readding the experience of others it can take varying degrees of time before `normality` returns. The common factor however seems to be how much ther person wants to recover and how hard they work at it that determines the rate and degree of recovery.
On the smoking thing, I seem to be in the minority here but I can understand why you quit smoking at the same time. I did the same with my 20 per day habit. I am on day 16 without alcohol or cigarettes now. For me it was a complete change of lifestyle that makes this recovery more sustainable. I have totally changed my behaviour and am now living the way I would like to for the rest of my life. Alcohol free and cigarette free. It is this whole lifestyle package that I want to fight for and i fear that if I kept smoking it would eventually give me the excuse of `well I'm not really healthy am I so why dont I drink too`.
I guess its a very personal choice. Good luck to you anyway and I hope you come through the rough patch and you get to enjoy the improvements that others here have proved are possible
oct
I think it has been said already but I dont think its anything unusual what you are experiencing. Readding the experience of others it can take varying degrees of time before `normality` returns. The common factor however seems to be how much ther person wants to recover and how hard they work at it that determines the rate and degree of recovery.
On the smoking thing, I seem to be in the minority here but I can understand why you quit smoking at the same time. I did the same with my 20 per day habit. I am on day 16 without alcohol or cigarettes now. For me it was a complete change of lifestyle that makes this recovery more sustainable. I have totally changed my behaviour and am now living the way I would like to for the rest of my life. Alcohol free and cigarette free. It is this whole lifestyle package that I want to fight for and i fear that if I kept smoking it would eventually give me the excuse of `well I'm not really healthy am I so why dont I drink too`.
I guess its a very personal choice. Good luck to you anyway and I hope you come through the rough patch and you get to enjoy the improvements that others here have proved are possible
oct
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Old & Sober Member of AA
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Nursing Home in Brick, New Jersey
Posts: 5,174
I don't remember how soon it was after I quit drinking that I started to experience feelings of apprehension...for no apparent reason. Then, I was hearing people in the rooms of AA talk about "free-floating anxiety", which seemed to describe what I was going through. Apparently, it's very common. I just googled out of curiosity, and this is what I found:
Sound familiar?
As for the nicotine "deprivation", it took me six years in AA before I could successfully quit that nasty habit! It was much easier for me to quit drinking; and, strangely enough, I never really feel a desire to drink; but, I feel like Pavlov's dog with all the "triggers" that cause me to feel like lighting up again: after eating, after swimming, getting into the car to drive...when I sit down to do my taxes! Go figure!
Personally, I feel one addiction at a time is enough to handle...good luck on sobriety for now. If you should feel the urge to drink...light up instead! JMHO!
Free-floating Anxiety
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Free-floating Anxiety is anxiety not associated with a particular object, event, or situation.
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Free-floating Anxiety is anxiety not associated with a particular object, event, or situation.
As for the nicotine "deprivation", it took me six years in AA before I could successfully quit that nasty habit! It was much easier for me to quit drinking; and, strangely enough, I never really feel a desire to drink; but, I feel like Pavlov's dog with all the "triggers" that cause me to feel like lighting up again: after eating, after swimming, getting into the car to drive...when I sit down to do my taxes! Go figure!
Personally, I feel one addiction at a time is enough to handle...good luck on sobriety for now. If you should feel the urge to drink...light up instead! JMHO!
everything is already ok
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Melbourne Victoria Australia
Posts: 19,793
As anna said recovery is not a straight line and what your describing sounds like early recovery to me. Give yourself a break, see a Dr if your worried and take it one day at a time. Do you have a program?
Kevin
Kevin
Member
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Central California
Posts: 246
Hi Need4Change, I only experienced the feelings you decribe for the first 2-3 days after I quit drinking and after that it was OK. I quit using tobacco on Sept. 28, 2006 and I quit drinking on June 3, 2007. I could not have quit both at the same time...I admire you for having the courage to try it. Sending prayers your way...GH
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,445
I'm with Octoman...
I know there's a lot of smokers here - and I was a 30-40 a day man myself - but to recommend keeping smoking sounds like bollocks to me. Kinda like giving up swimming with sharks to take up russian roulette.
Not preachin' just sayin'...someone I love smokes.
D
I know there's a lot of smokers here - and I was a 30-40 a day man myself - but to recommend keeping smoking sounds like bollocks to me. Kinda like giving up swimming with sharks to take up russian roulette.
Not preachin' just sayin'...someone I love smokes.
D
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