ladyjane

I posted earlier today about my daughter being back.

Well the county cops came by and picked her up while I was making dinner. She wanted me to lie but I wouldn't. I asked him in and took him to where my daughter was skulking, talking to abusive bf on the phone.
She cried and carried on and grabbed grandson and hugged him to her. She asked the cop to please let her stay until tomorrow as she hadn't seen her son in months.She lives 35 miles away so I ask why haven't you seen him. He's been right here.
I take grandson away and tell her to stand up and be adult about this. Go with the nice policeman. She has to see a judge in the morning.
No, we won't bond her out of jail.
Since all the drama yesterday, she's been totally disrespectful to us. Continued to talk to abusive bf who was totally disrespectful as well. She hasn't spent 5 minutes with her son since she got home yesterday.
I guess if she gets out bf will have to do it. And he doesn't have 2 cents to rub together.
Just an update.
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Trish

dollydo

Thanks for the update.

I thought to myself yesterday when you picked her up, why was she talking to the abuser....then I thought, because she has every intention of going back to him.

I am sorry, she obviously is not a responsible adult. I am so glad that you are providing a safe haven for your grandson.

My grandparents raised me for the first 7 years of my life, I wouldn't be the person I am today, if is was not for them. They saved me, I am forever grateful for the stability they provided.

Let her stew, she made her decisions, now she must pay the price.

Hugs,

marle

At least she is safe and away from the abusive boyfriend. You know where she is and you don't have to deal with the chaos. I have been in that spot before with my daughter here for a visit while on the phone screaming at the abf. I know my stress meter went through the roof. It is so much easier to let them deal with each other in the privacy of their own humble abode. If your daughter is anything like mine, I am sure she gets in her share of abuse. Kudos for keeping your grandchild safe from the chaos of addiction. Hugs, Marle

Ann

I think God's works are in play here, so everyone stand back and let Him through, okay?

She's be fine, jail is a good place for her to get clean and have some time to think clearly before she gets out again.

Sadly, most abused women go back, it a cycle that continues sometimes for years. Perhaps get her some information about women's shelters so if and when she decides she needs one, she will know who to call....and next time it won't be you, which is a win/win situation.

I'm sorry you are going through the drama, but glad you are taking care of the child. You are both blessed.

Hugs

hope213

sorry you had to go thru that. as far as bond,it is strange how the addicts can come up with bond money when they want to. my a.s. had bonds put up for him 3 times in 4 months last winter in different counties.continue to take care of yourself. prayers,

ladyjane

By the time ad gets out of jail, abusive bf will be in for 4 months for various charges.
My husband says she can't come back here so I guess we'll be in for a ride. She's calling now for underwear. They can only have white. I told her I'd try to get it to her tomorrow and she's flipping out. I had to hang up on her. I won't accept anymore phone calls from her while she's in jail although I will bring underwear to the jail for her. Btw she's only there for about 10 days.
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Trish

caileesnana

I'm glad she is safe away from him now. I pray someone touches her the next 10 days and she comes to her senses. You are all in my prayers,
susan

Lobo

ladyjane, I just went through this 1 month ago. I didn't bail my daughter out either. She called me crying a couple of times. She was in for a week. I always told her if she ended up in jail do not expect me to visit or bail you out. I stuck to my word. She is sober now and facing a hearing on Sept. 6th. She said she is deathly scared of jail. Maybe that is what she needed.

Take care of yourself and sleep well.........she is safe.

Wascally Wabbit

I once had a recovering addict send me her story. She got clean and has been clean for a couple of years. She went through this same thing. She had two little children and her mother quit enabling her. She had to spend about a year in jail. When she got out, she was determined to never go back.
It was a sad story about how she got addicted and her life went straight down hill. She had to experience the consequences of her behavior, and even said if she hadn't she'd probably still be using.

You have done the right thing. I know it hurts. But this could be the thing that kicks her butt into sobriety.
Hugs to you.