Drunks, drunks go away...
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Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: right here, right now
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Drunks, drunks go away...
:uzi2:
May I vent a bit?
I have to vent my house every night and every morning because it smells like a distillery. *insert puke smilie here* I can't stand the stench of stale alcohol breath. I can't stand the stench of drunk. You know how they smell the day after, when they can trot off to work and act all responsible and smart and wonderful?
But I bet at AH's workplace there's someone just like me. Someone who sits in her (or his) cubicle and smells that old, stale stench on him walking by. And he thinks nobody knows. Ha.
I can smell the alcoholics in my office. And I get angry because work has been my sanctuary, where I've been able to go and get away from the smell and the pain and the hellishness. But they're here, too. Reminding me.
I have to get to a meeting this week. Ugh.
May I vent a bit?
I have to vent my house every night and every morning because it smells like a distillery. *insert puke smilie here* I can't stand the stench of stale alcohol breath. I can't stand the stench of drunk. You know how they smell the day after, when they can trot off to work and act all responsible and smart and wonderful?
But I bet at AH's workplace there's someone just like me. Someone who sits in her (or his) cubicle and smells that old, stale stench on him walking by. And he thinks nobody knows. Ha.
I can smell the alcoholics in my office. And I get angry because work has been my sanctuary, where I've been able to go and get away from the smell and the pain and the hellishness. But they're here, too. Reminding me.
I have to get to a meeting this week. Ugh.
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Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: San Fernando Valley, CA
Posts: 20
My AH thinks Listerine fools everyone. I dont even like to invite my kids friends over because of the smell of stale sweat and alcohol downstairs. Thankfully he sleeps on the couch. A choice he made a long long time ago... it became MY choice and MY fault as soon as I stopped asking him why he preferred the TV and couch to me.. As soon as I stopped caring, he started blaming me.. I know its because after passing out in the early evening, he wakes up around mid-night and either starts drinking again so he can pass out again and get some sleep... or he stays up till the wee wee hours watching TV.
I am glad I have an upstairs to go to with the kids in the evening... you should see me creeping down the stairs if I need to go into the kitchen.... slowly, slowly, dont want to wake him up and talk... sometimes he's so out of it though a elephant wouldnt wake him. I actually like those times.
I am glad I have an upstairs to go to with the kids in the evening... you should see me creeping down the stairs if I need to go into the kitchen.... slowly, slowly, dont want to wake him up and talk... sometimes he's so out of it though a elephant wouldnt wake him. I actually like those times.
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Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: where the streets have no name
Posts: 1,078
Originally Posted by Wascally Wabbit 
My boss has the most rancid breath some days. His whole body smells. It's pretty amazing considering he's so neat and clean.
I hate that smell. It's like rotten meat.
I hate that smell. It's like rotten meat.
yUCK
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Join Date: Jun 2007
Posts: 62
I'm glad I'm not the only one whose been there.
I told Abf that when he was drinking, he had the worst BO I had ever smelled. A friend once took me aside at her son's birthday party to tell me he stunk of booze so bad that she was embarrassed for me. I guess in those days I didn't realize that anyone but me could smell it.
He also would get up at night to drink to sleep again and didn't tell me for months after detox that he was doing it. He would take jugs of cocktails to work with him (just juice if anyone asks..barf) so he could stay drunk.
Blame.. it was always there. When the Dr asked him why he drank, he reached over and patted my thigh and said "You're looking at her." The Dr asked me to wait outside then after his intake sat with me and said.. "Now I want the truth about things." I cried with relief that someone didn't blame me and saw through the lies.
He never learned basic hygiene as a kid. Didn't bathe for days (he's a manual laborer to make matters worse) or brush his teeth, some of which are fake because he went through the windshield of his car when he was much younger and he was driving drunk. His whole top portion of his face is fake because he shattered it too. He had the nerve to complain about the girl he had as a passenger and how bad she smelled while in a cast because her leg and her pelvis were broken in the accident.
When I cleaned out his car while he was in detox, it was disgusting. Alcohol saturated the carpets and upholstery. There was a puddle in the cup holder and there were empties thrown all over the place. The worst thing by far, was in his padded lunchbox, there was about 2 inches of beer and a rotten snadwich that he had started to eat. There were also utensils that were caked with rotten food. Oh yes, eating garbage was the norm then and he still to this day argues that I am neurotic about food safety and gets on my case whenever he pleases about my "obsessions" concerning proper hygiene.
Working on making the end permanent for me. I want more in life than this.
I told Abf that when he was drinking, he had the worst BO I had ever smelled. A friend once took me aside at her son's birthday party to tell me he stunk of booze so bad that she was embarrassed for me. I guess in those days I didn't realize that anyone but me could smell it.
He also would get up at night to drink to sleep again and didn't tell me for months after detox that he was doing it. He would take jugs of cocktails to work with him (just juice if anyone asks..barf) so he could stay drunk.
Blame.. it was always there. When the Dr asked him why he drank, he reached over and patted my thigh and said "You're looking at her." The Dr asked me to wait outside then after his intake sat with me and said.. "Now I want the truth about things." I cried with relief that someone didn't blame me and saw through the lies.
He never learned basic hygiene as a kid. Didn't bathe for days (he's a manual laborer to make matters worse) or brush his teeth, some of which are fake because he went through the windshield of his car when he was much younger and he was driving drunk. His whole top portion of his face is fake because he shattered it too. He had the nerve to complain about the girl he had as a passenger and how bad she smelled while in a cast because her leg and her pelvis were broken in the accident.
When I cleaned out his car while he was in detox, it was disgusting. Alcohol saturated the carpets and upholstery. There was a puddle in the cup holder and there were empties thrown all over the place. The worst thing by far, was in his padded lunchbox, there was about 2 inches of beer and a rotten snadwich that he had started to eat. There were also utensils that were caked with rotten food. Oh yes, eating garbage was the norm then and he still to this day argues that I am neurotic about food safety and gets on my case whenever he pleases about my "obsessions" concerning proper hygiene.
Working on making the end permanent for me. I want more in life than this.
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Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Stumbling toward happiness
Posts: 4,706
When you no longer want to live with it, you will change. You will set boundaries. Or you'll get an inlaw apartment and make him live separately from you. Or whatever choice you make. But as long as you're willing to live in a distillery, you will.
I couldn't -- and can't -- deal with it any more. I carried the tension and disgust in every cell of my body for a long time and the stress made me develop physical illnesses that cost hundreds of dollars to treat. Pancreatitis, acid reflux, you name it.
Which all, magically, disappeared when I stopped living with alcoholic/addicts. I haven't even gotten so much as a bad cold in years.
Drunks and stoners smell. They are committing slow-motion suicide, and you expect them to worry about how their rank odor bothers other people?
GL
I couldn't -- and can't -- deal with it any more. I carried the tension and disgust in every cell of my body for a long time and the stress made me develop physical illnesses that cost hundreds of dollars to treat. Pancreatitis, acid reflux, you name it.
Which all, magically, disappeared when I stopped living with alcoholic/addicts. I haven't even gotten so much as a bad cold in years.
Drunks and stoners smell. They are committing slow-motion suicide, and you expect them to worry about how their rank odor bothers other people?
GL
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Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Anchorage, AK
Posts: 221
I actually honestly could never smell vodka on AH, but his skid into oblivion began with red wine. Oh, those wine rings and splats everywhere!! Then it became hard liquior and later still, Listerine. I just know he drank that awful stuff.
For the life of me, I feel like I cannot get away from alcohol. It haunts me. My biological father was an abusive drunk, my husband became a drunk, my clients are mostly alcoholics--what do I need to learn here in this life that I am being stalked by booze?!
For the life of me, I feel like I cannot get away from alcohol. It haunts me. My biological father was an abusive drunk, my husband became a drunk, my clients are mostly alcoholics--what do I need to learn here in this life that I am being stalked by booze?!
Guess what, I'm not crazy.
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Oregon
Posts: 286
My husband thinks I am a bit crazy about the clean thing too. He gets stupid and does things like put a dirty bird dish in my dishpan or the bunny dish. For those of you who have not had a bunny or birds..... They do things like POOP on stuff. I might come home and he has done the dishes and there is the pet dishes in the strainer and I can see what what caught in the screen in the sink.
I have to wate tell he is asleep or out of the area but I will clean the sink with bleach water then clean the dish pan and put new soap in with a dash of bleach and wash the dishes again.
Sometimes I think he does not understand that poop is poop. Funny thing is he is frantic about making sure I bleach all the whites with no less than a cup of bleach per load. Go figure.
I have to wate tell he is asleep or out of the area but I will clean the sink with bleach water then clean the dish pan and put new soap in with a dash of bleach and wash the dishes again.
Sometimes I think he does not understand that poop is poop. Funny thing is he is frantic about making sure I bleach all the whites with no less than a cup of bleach per load. Go figure.
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Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: my own little world
Posts: 9,071
My AH has this funny odor when drinking Vodka, sometimes I swear its worse. After drinking a pint, alcohol still seeps through his skin. I thought I was the oly one who noticed it on co workers, people in stores ect, they are all clean, spruced up, nice cologne, but I know
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When you no longer want to live with it, you will change. You will set boundaries. Or you'll get an inlaw apartment and make him live separately from you. Or whatever choice you make. But as long as you're willing to live in a distillery, you will.
The scary thing to me is how I've lost perspective of what's normal and acceptable. And that I know I'll continue doing it. I'm just like the physically abused women I worked with in college. "I'll walk if he ever lays a hand on me" turned into "He only hit me once" and into "He only hits me on weekends" and into "He only hits me when I annoy him"... I don't know when I'll be ready to get out. It's like I'm two people. One who knows how bad it is, and that it's not getting any better, and that I should get out now, before it gets worse. And another one who is still hoping that that wonderful guy I married will return.
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