sbsmichelle

Hi,
My name is Michelle I have a little over 4 months clean and sober and I am now trying to do my forth step. I just can't understand how. I've tried the way it shows in the big book and now I'm trying a narrative. The problem is I still don't get it. Could some give me some suggestions?

Spiritual Seeker

Do you have a sponsor to work your steps with? This is key because your sponsor can work this step with you in a meaningful way. The steps were not intended to be worked alone. Are you going to meetings? Look in the AA directory and find and add a step study mtg.to your schedule. Good Luck and Remember step 1,2,3 are like a waltz that we must do over & over.

sbsmichelle

Yes I do have a sponsor she has 25yrs or more. For some reason I'm just not getting her explanation. I go to meetings at least 4 times a week, and I'm also speaking at meetings and correctional facilities. I'm just not clear on what it is that I need to get out of me or how to write it down. Thank you

Cynay

I think the 4th is probably much different in Al-anon/CoDA then AA but why dont you just sit down with a pen and pad of paper and start at the beginning... write a history of your drinking career and what happened to bring you to this point... make sure to be specific about important relationships you had along the way and how you "felt" about them and they "felt" about you.......

leviathon

Wow fourth step at four months, that is very ambitious. I am impressed. Took me a lot longer as I needed time for my head to clear and to really make a solid connection with my higher power.

In terms of suggestions, it will take time, do not force it. I started by making a list of the resentments that I was holding onto. I then made a list of the various people that I knew I had wronged. That took me a while to do it thoroughly. I then talked them over with a counsellor, couldn't do it with my sponsor, some of it was just way to intimate and personal.

Levi

Astro

Hazelded has nice pamphlets on each of the Steps, the only one I've used was for my 4th Step at the suggestion of my sponsor http://www.hazelden.org/OA_HTML/ibeC...?a=b&item=2703

Jersey Nonny

Just a suggestion, Michelle...we're not running a marathon race here...no need to rush into doing every single step within the first six months. "Recovery" is a life-long process...so, Easy Does It. Maybe you just need to listen a bit more to how others got started on this step, and work into it slowly. As someone else suggested, sit down and start writing...you'll be surprised how the words will fall into place, once you get going.