UrbanFool

Why don’t I care enough to do something with myself? Why am I not important enough to care about? What needs to happen to me FOR me to care? What really is my bottom? Dead? My husband finally went to an Al-Anon meeting last night. Unfortunately, we’re both dog sick, and going to a meeting is about as far from possible as I can imagine at the moment. Fortunately, I’m sick enough to not care about a bottle either. Guess I should call my sponsor.

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I can’t believe I blew thirty days. It was like I was just waiting for it.

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So, I’m back at the beginning. But at least I’m sober.

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Kelly

michski

(((( kelly )))))

You're only did what comes naturally for us drunks... By the way, your disease was waiting for YOU! It will always be there ready to take you down. Congratulations on your honesty and your decision to start over again. I hope you never ever have to hit your worse feared bottom... quit while you're ahead! You know the suggestions perhaps now it's time for a little more action? Don't bend that elbow!

phoenixn

Don't give up Kelly. I know it works for lots of people, but although "go to a meeting, call your sponsor, don't drink/use before meetings" is great advice, I had to find something more than that.

Now with significant (for me) sobriety time after finding a solution that works for me, I continue to go to meetings to share my experience, strength and hope (as unpopular as it may be). The important thing is that you find what works for you. If its AA thats great. Otherwise, don't leave any stone unturned. Keep making effort. You WILL succeed!

In memory of miracle

Welcome back (( Kelly ))

Grimnar

I struggle with those questions myself. We just have to hope that the promises materialize.

One of the things I am doing is making a list of things I want to do in my life. Next year, two years away, 5 years..... my dreams.

Anna

Welcome back Kelly!

I didn't care about myself either, not a bit. I thought it was the right thing to do everything for my family and friends. I lost myself completely. It's so important, even if it's hard sometimes, to take care of yourself. You are important!

AndrewBeen

Alcohol clouds our perception and our thinking. Even when we are not drunk. It takes a while to get out from under the clouds. Go a few months and see if your thinking clears.

Little Missy

((Kelly)) Welcome back!!

I had 3 sips of beer at a wedding reception ( I was the matron of honor), and lost 4 months!! I didn't even finish the drink, I poured it out. That was a miracle for me!!

What I found was that I didn't really lose that time. I just learned a little more on my journey!! I did start over with the Steps and cried when I gave back my 4 month chip. It was a very difficult lesson to learn.

Look back now and see what "caused" you to drink. That's where the lesson is. Next time you will know better what to do!!

Dust yourself off!! We will be your stength until you are strong, your hope until you believe!!

Hugs,
Missy

Chy

Your back and that's what matters, remember what led you back out and learn something from it. Hang in there and congrats on day 1!