An Observation
Life is Grand
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Michigan
Posts: 2,039
An Observation
I was thinking yesterday and it dawned on me that this whole pandemic situation might give "Normal" people a glimpse into our lives. I posted the following on my Facebook page and the response was wonderful. Thoughts?
"The situation in the world today might have you anxious, almost afraid to leave the house at times. There is no safety net, you HAVE to deal with it. You might be afraid to be around other people, maybe there are sleepless nights about what the future will hold. Worry may be a constant companion at times and uncertainty might be the norm . Somewhere in your mind, way back in the corner, you know that things will get better if you just keep going, but it is hard to focus on that right now, so you break it down into just surviving today. As much as you wish you could run away from it, you can't, so you just keep on keeping on, one day at a time.
This is as close to a "Normal" person feeling what it is like to first enter sobriety for an Alcoholic or Addict as you will probably get. This is what we feel everyday. It gets better with time, then, one day we look up from our fog and say WTF am I supposed to do now. But we keep going, one day at a time until life gets a little clearer. Hopefully, with God's grace, we make it out alive.
Stay safe my extended family, this old (sober) Alcoholic appreciates you bringing a smile to my face in these difficult times."
Thanks for reading....Cathy
"The situation in the world today might have you anxious, almost afraid to leave the house at times. There is no safety net, you HAVE to deal with it. You might be afraid to be around other people, maybe there are sleepless nights about what the future will hold. Worry may be a constant companion at times and uncertainty might be the norm . Somewhere in your mind, way back in the corner, you know that things will get better if you just keep going, but it is hard to focus on that right now, so you break it down into just surviving today. As much as you wish you could run away from it, you can't, so you just keep on keeping on, one day at a time.
This is as close to a "Normal" person feeling what it is like to first enter sobriety for an Alcoholic or Addict as you will probably get. This is what we feel everyday. It gets better with time, then, one day we look up from our fog and say WTF am I supposed to do now. But we keep going, one day at a time until life gets a little clearer. Hopefully, with God's grace, we make it out alive.
Stay safe my extended family, this old (sober) Alcoholic appreciates you bringing a smile to my face in these difficult times."
Thanks for reading....Cathy
Member
Join Date: Dec 2019
Posts: 307
Hi, Redhead. I hope many, many people read your FBook post, and if just a few of them now grasp what you’re trying to say - and more so, empathize with the situation /circumstances the newly-sober alcoholic finds him/herself in - it would be wonderful. The sad thing is that 99% of those who read it, will even now, with the COVID19 virus such a huge reality and their own worlds turned upside-down, still view the hell the recovering alcoholic go through in the same old way: “Tough s***, bud. You brought it on yourself…”
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Posts: 11,431
I used feel that way about my alcoholic mother RB for many years.
It was only when struggling with my own addiction and relapses that empathy finally began to grow towards her, and then towards all addicts in a Buddhist Metta sort of way. Alcoholism made my childhood a living hell, and I have had lifelong repercussions because of it. I was full of anger for decades, and drank to suppress it. Ironic, I know.
Anyway, now I regret the amount of anger I held towards towards my mother in the last years of her life. We both were doing the best we were able at the time, so I’ve made peace with it all now.
But a by-product has been that I’ve really wrestled with judging others my whole life. I think it was because I felt so inadequate as a daughter. I couldn’t save her or myself.
I digress, but it seems related somehow-I do believe families of addicts understand uncertainty,fear, and despair maybe even more than the addicts they love.
It was only when struggling with my own addiction and relapses that empathy finally began to grow towards her, and then towards all addicts in a Buddhist Metta sort of way. Alcoholism made my childhood a living hell, and I have had lifelong repercussions because of it. I was full of anger for decades, and drank to suppress it. Ironic, I know.
Anyway, now I regret the amount of anger I held towards towards my mother in the last years of her life. We both were doing the best we were able at the time, so I’ve made peace with it all now.
But a by-product has been that I’ve really wrestled with judging others my whole life. I think it was because I felt so inadequate as a daughter. I couldn’t save her or myself.
I digress, but it seems related somehow-I do believe families of addicts understand uncertainty,fear, and despair maybe even more than the addicts they love.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2015
Posts: 3,163
What thoughtful posts.
This is what makes this place and each of you so amazing.
Hawk, I think my daughter felt as you did until a couple of years ago. She is 26, and I stopped drinking when she was 21 or so. Her elementary years were good but high school was rough.
It took her a long time to trust I would really stop and give up her fear. But last 1-2 years she has. and if ever I think of a drink, that alone stops me.
Also of course becuase it would be brain dead stupid.
Thank you.
This is what makes this place and each of you so amazing.
Hawk, I think my daughter felt as you did until a couple of years ago. She is 26, and I stopped drinking when she was 21 or so. Her elementary years were good but high school was rough.
It took her a long time to trust I would really stop and give up her fear. But last 1-2 years she has. and if ever I think of a drink, that alone stops me.
Also of course becuase it would be brain dead stupid.
Thank you.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2020
Posts: 49
Originally Posted by Surlyredhead 
I was thinking yesterday and it dawned on me that this whole pandemic situation might give "Normal" people a glimpse into our lives. I posted the following on my Facebook page and the response was wonderful. Thoughts?
"The situation in the world today might have you anxious, almost afraid to leave the house at times. There is no safety net, you HAVE to deal with it. You might be afraid to be around other people, maybe there are sleepless nights about what the future will hold. Worry may be a constant companion at times and uncertainty might be the norm . Somewhere in your mind, way back in the corner, you know that things will get better if you just keep going, but it is hard to focus on that right now, so you break it down into just surviving today. As much as you wish you could run away from it, you can't, so you just keep on keeping on, one day at a time.
This is as close to a "Normal" person feeling what it is like to first enter sobriety for an Alcoholic or Addict as you will probably get. This is what we feel everyday. It gets better with time, then, one day we look up from our fog and say WTF am I supposed to do now. But we keep going, one day at a time until life gets a little clearer. Hopefully, with God's grace, we make it out alive.
Stay safe my extended family, this old (sober) Alcoholic appreciates you bringing a smile to my face in these difficult times."
Thanks for reading....Cathy
"The situation in the world today might have you anxious, almost afraid to leave the house at times. There is no safety net, you HAVE to deal with it. You might be afraid to be around other people, maybe there are sleepless nights about what the future will hold. Worry may be a constant companion at times and uncertainty might be the norm . Somewhere in your mind, way back in the corner, you know that things will get better if you just keep going, but it is hard to focus on that right now, so you break it down into just surviving today. As much as you wish you could run away from it, you can't, so you just keep on keeping on, one day at a time.
This is as close to a "Normal" person feeling what it is like to first enter sobriety for an Alcoholic or Addict as you will probably get. This is what we feel everyday. It gets better with time, then, one day we look up from our fog and say WTF am I supposed to do now. But we keep going, one day at a time until life gets a little clearer. Hopefully, with God's grace, we make it out alive.
Stay safe my extended family, this old (sober) Alcoholic appreciates you bringing a smile to my face in these difficult times."
Thanks for reading....Cathy
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,444
I do find that i tend to drink too much in pubs only so drinking at home will be fine.
Have you thought about not drinking at all Binger?
D
Member
Join Date: Apr 2020
Posts: 49
Originally Posted by Dee74
Hmm I thought that too - eventually I actually drank more than I did in pubs because there was no one to see me and get embarrassed by,
Have you thought about not drinking at all Binger?
D
Have you thought about not drinking at all Binger?
D
always end up taking it up again at a party or a trip to the pub/gig etc.
I quit at new year and didn't drink till 22nd Feb when Tyson Fury was fighting and I was in a casino staying up to watch it - so had about 5 beers. not really that much but that's not the point
Member
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: US
Posts: 5,095
I agree. And I was also thinking in more general mental health terms.
Not drinking just means I'm sober. But I still have terrible anxiety that can lead to depressive bouts. I was thinking that maybe the world is experiencing what those of us who struggle with mental health experience on a daily basis.
So all this lock down, stay at home, don't touch talk or breath on anyone is kind of my comfort zone. But it's making others crazy. Welcome to my world of trying to be 'normal' and never quite succeeding.
Interesting......
Not drinking just means I'm sober. But I still have terrible anxiety that can lead to depressive bouts. I was thinking that maybe the world is experiencing what those of us who struggle with mental health experience on a daily basis.
So all this lock down, stay at home, don't touch talk or breath on anyone is kind of my comfort zone. But it's making others crazy. Welcome to my world of trying to be 'normal' and never quite succeeding.
Interesting......
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
