anxiousrock

By myself.
I’m gonna call a counsellor today when I’m at work. Hasn’t been to busy and I just need help.
I’m so disappointed I relapsed. I truly thought I was doing good.
I’ve been busy and not attending as many meetings as i would like. It’s at 830, which is late for me since I dong get home from it until 10.
I need the support, I should really be going. I never want to feel like this again.

tomsteve

Anarock, i think the 1st thing you should do is toss out the ass kicking machine- it aint gonna help. youre not a bad person, just a sick one and there IS a solution.

good on ya for going to meetings, but this could be a good lesson- going to meetings and not drinking dont treat alcoholism. its the steps we take, not the meetings we make, that does that:
here are the steps we took which are suggested as a program of recovery.

do you have the number for your sponsor and others in recovery? ya know, them numbers work wonders when theyre used before picking up a drink. the phone is much lighter than a bottle and much better solutions.

please change this:
I need the support
to:
i WANT the support.
i needed support 20 or so years before i stopped drinking.

Lpg

Hey anarock

How's it going now? Hope you managed to speak to a councellor they really do help with starting to moving forward and understanding things clearer. Iv not seen mine for a few weeks as he had to cancel and I'm now starting to feel on edge so I know it helps having someone to talk to. Aa sounds like a good plan too. Your not alone we all in this together I'm not feeling particularly great right now either and my av is going nuts. You can do this I hope you feel better soon.

ScottFromWI

Calling a counselor sounds like a great idea Anarock - it really helped me to have someone to talk with in person.

anxiousrock

I wanted to try to get in to the counsellor today but no appointments were available....so tomorrow I am going.
I feel awful about drinking, so mad at myself.

ScottFromWI

Perhaps you could go to a meeting today instead then? You don't need an appointment for that.

Spence7471

Anarock,

Please do not beat yourself up for your slip, that is our job...

Slips happens... so instead of focusing on the negative aspect of the action, focus on the positive side of the situation... you realized your mistake and are willing to do something about it. Do not let the slip define you and your future...

anxiousrock

It is definitely on my list. Hopefully AA doesn't close for snow storms...I actually sent them an email today!

anxiousrock

It's really hard not to beat myself up....I always do.

Stayingsassy

Work hard to shed the shame. Your addiction got in the door. Its hard to beat when it gets in. It probably started with a train of thought about "missing out" and then it snowballed. Next time, don't even let it get a crack in the door, focus on the peaceful healthy sexy self you're going to be when you stop poisoning yourself.

Best of luck with your counselor. Hugs. Baby yourself today like a woman who deserves it because a fighter like you does deserve it and you deserve sobriety too.

ChloeRose63

After you get done with your own a**kicking make sure to forgive the 'chid in you' for making a mistake and give yourself some love.

tomsteve

we didnt stop drinkin because of snow storms. AA doesnt close for them .
a meeting might not occur, but theres only one way to find out.
call them nimbers of other members ya have,too,eh?

anxiousrock

That is a fair point....it actually stopped snowing so I know there will definitely be a meeting!
Is it okay to go to them looking like a train wreck? haha

tomsteve

i used to frame houses. id show up covered in sawdust,sweat,and dirt.
willing to go to any lengths.
hope ya have a good meeting!!

Berrybean

Yes. It is.

In the meantime, I recommend a good dose of Sandy Beach.
https://www.recoveryaudio.org/aa-spe...v-daytona-1990

BB x