Smartwater28

So todays my first day of a new life so i thought naturally i should find a an AA chatroom AND PARTICIPATE. but wholly jesus christ they tore me to pieces for not believing in a higher power. Literally im less inclined to reach out for help than ive ever been because of what happened, but i know better what other than AA helped you on your journey?

Bird615

I've noticed that some online AA members/chatrooms can be like that, but that I haven't really seen that happen here on SR.

I also know that in all my years of AA attendance, I've found people like that to be the exception rather than the rule. I'd give face-to-face meetings a try to get a better feel for it. Even atheists have had success with the 12 steps.

BrendaChenowyth

What do you mean they tore you to pieces?

Try an actual AA meeting. Everyone's brave behind a keyboard.

Doug39

I agree that people have more courage online to voice their opinions.

I am not deeply religious but I do believe in God - some people at AA meeting are deeply religious and I don't debate beliefs with anyone.

We are there to help each other stay sober no matter what it takes.

Ken33xx

That was one AA chatroom and not necessarily what you'll find in every on-line chat. The same with AA meetings. They often vary.

It might be worthwhile to explore other on-line AA recovery sites and see what you get.

Steely

I'm so sorry. Annoying isn't it?

I know AA works for many people, but not for me, yet I am sober and loving it.

Don't let it turn you off getting sober there are many ways, most importantly your own determination and actions. You will find your own way within.

ljc267

I'm not in AA and am not commenting on AA specifically, but if anyone or group was ripping me for not believing as they believe I would not want to be a part of that group.

From my understanding AA is rooted in the belief of a higher power. Just like any group some take things to the extreme. I would suggest giving a meeting in person a try to see where that goes.

You owe yourself and no one else. If AA isn't for you then find some thing that is.

ScottFromWI

I would also say you ran into a "people" problem today and not an "AA" problem. Chatrooms in general can be difficult places to spend time unless they are very well moderated

Smartwater28

thank you so much. this is the information that i needed that. The poeple at AA think SO DIFFERENTLY from my reality and reaching out to community members like you make it alot easier to be sober. and i finally undertstand that its ok to think more progressive than what they preach.

ScottFromWI

I'm glad you are here reaching out for help Smartwater. Please keep in mind though that the SR forum is not dedicated to any particular recovery program, we welcome those from all programs or even those who don't follow a specific program. There are plenty of folks here who do participate in 12 step programs as well, and there are even subforums specifically for discussing 12 step programs.

entropy1964

I'm sorry that happened. I have never participated in AA online but I do attend meetings. I have never had a bad experience.

That being said, don't let the BS of online people who are obviously sick deter you from seeking help. Your addiction would love for you to use this as an excuse to isolate and possibly keep drinking. Check out the Secular Forum too.

I could never find a HP. I hated the idea. Me? Powerless? NO way. But finally I was able to realize it is a hp of MY understanding. And man, things got very simple from there. That's just my experience.

You won't regret quitting and there are plenty of ways to do it. And one big thing to remember : Who cares what other people think. Especially a bunch of people on the internet. Haha! Oh yeah, guess I'm one of those people. Hope you know what I mean.

ljc267

For me personally, this place has helped me more then AA or any other group would have. I'm not one to share my personal feelings or thoughts in public. I also don't feel a higher power will help me. I need to help myself. That's not to say that I don't believe in God. I just think he has better things to do then help me, lol. It's the way I think. Not saying it's the right way or the wrong way. That is my point. It's what works for me, but maybe not you.

Here I can share my thoughts and feelings about my alcoholism and not be judged and hear constructive advice from people like me. It works for me.

There are others that require a more personal approach which is just as good if that is what you need.

JeffreyAK

There are lots of options other than AA, though face-to-face meetings might be harder to come by depending on where you live. There's nothing wrong with not wanting to follow the AA path. It's one path, and it does work for some people, but there are other paths that have a completely different philosophy, so it's not just a matter of people, it can be a matter of approach and basic foundational principles that either fit you or do not fit you. For me personally, my recovery was built up on personal empowerment, and discarding forever the notion of reliance upon a higher power was a critical step. YMMV.

shortstop81

The only requirement for AA membership is a desire to stop drinking.

That is a core AA tradition, and while others may argue about other aspects of the program, this one is not up for debate. At my home group there have been many who have initially struggled with concept of a Higher Power (including me), but kept an open mind and eventually found one of their own understanding. The key part is an open mind - NOT pushing beliefs down anyone's throat.

Smartwater - it sounds like you had a bad experience but don't let one online group dictate your overall impression of the program. AA members are human beings and are just as flawed as anyone out there.

NYCDoglvr

I'm sober a long time but would never visit a chatroom. Lots of trolls and angry people who have no program. I'm an agnostic -- GOD = group of drunks, and that works great for me. Do not confuse AA with what what one or two people say. If you read Big Book you'll find it's a very gentle path to finding a higher power. And, "the only requirement for membership is a desire to stop drinking". AA also urges people to stop being judgemental.

zjw

there not all bad. I live in a pretty conservative area and at the local meeting the one evening one of our members a lesbian and an athiest spoke up about how she was so happy she was so accepted in the group and no one cared about her beliefs and backgrounds etc.. I thought it was awesome she felt this way and was at the meeting getting what she needed etc..

there not all bad.

I agree everyones got diff beliefs and backgrounds but I'm a firm believer people gotta be there for sobrietys sake first and foremost. its not really time and the place to for much else.

Bobbieka

"take what you need and leave the rest"

There are a lot of options. Find what works for you.

NewRomanMan

Slightly offensive comment. Disparaging might be the better word. I've been active in AA the whole of my sobriety and you don't have to believe in a higher power no matter WHAT anyone else tells you. The only requirement for AA is a desire to stop drinking Nothing else. You certainly don't have to believe in God even if you did want to take a higher power. It can be a paper cup as long as it works for you and keeps you sober.

ScottFromWI

Posts have been removed from the thread. Please remember that discussions about specific recovery methods are welcome here, but personal arguments/opinions disparaging a particular recovery method are not. Our goal is to help all members of this forum, and there are much better ways to do so than by sharing negative statements about particular recovery plans.

tomsteve

AA works for people that believe in God.
AA works for people that don't believe in God.
AA doesn't work for people that believe they are God.

it is kind of weird,though, to read someone use
jesus Christ
and say they don't believe in a higher power.