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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2015
Posts: 1
New to the site
Hello dear friends.
I find myself troubled and clearly teaching out for help. As you can guess by my user name, my name is Maksim and I am originally from Russia many years ago. However, I am proud to say I was raised in the great country USA. I am currently an IT specialist and I own my own company. In my free time, I fly airplanes, go boating, and enjoy the outdoors.
Drinking has never been a struggle for me. My genetics and culture background play a huge role into the culture behind drinking. It is simply used with most meals and apart of holiday celebrations, and all. I never over did it until a couple years ago when I started drinking a little more and more. I thought I was fine because of my tolerance and all... I started dating this beautiful girl about 5 months ago and she slowly started seeing my progression. At first it was offering support but it led to many fights and disappointments. She told me to get help and I started seeing a counselor. I got a lot better after a couple months but started up again socially. It turned into more fights as she tries to be strict and watch how many drinks I have.
So here I am back searching for support. My girlfriend she still supports me and helps me work through it but I cannot do it a lone. I see my counselor again. Any advice or thoughts is good. You can PM me for questions or anything.
Cheers and take care.
Maksim
I find myself troubled and clearly teaching out for help. As you can guess by my user name, my name is Maksim and I am originally from Russia many years ago. However, I am proud to say I was raised in the great country USA. I am currently an IT specialist and I own my own company. In my free time, I fly airplanes, go boating, and enjoy the outdoors.
Drinking has never been a struggle for me. My genetics and culture background play a huge role into the culture behind drinking. It is simply used with most meals and apart of holiday celebrations, and all. I never over did it until a couple years ago when I started drinking a little more and more. I thought I was fine because of my tolerance and all... I started dating this beautiful girl about 5 months ago and she slowly started seeing my progression. At first it was offering support but it led to many fights and disappointments. She told me to get help and I started seeing a counselor. I got a lot better after a couple months but started up again socially. It turned into more fights as she tries to be strict and watch how many drinks I have.
So here I am back searching for support. My girlfriend she still supports me and helps me work through it but I cannot do it a lone. I see my counselor again. Any advice or thoughts is good. You can PM me for questions or anything.
Cheers and take care.
Maksim
Forum Leader
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 16,945
Welcome to SR Maksim. You'll find a lot of support here on SR and information on all the different ways people get and stay sober. For me, the most important first step was accepting the fact that I cannot drink responsibly, and that I never will be able to. This also means that it is never possible for me to drink even one drink...because it will always lead to more.
I think seeing your counselor is a fine idea, have you considered any other forms of support like meetings perhaps? Here on SR there are monthly and daily threads you can join in the newcomers area to find a group of people online who are on the same path - sometimes it's nice to have a home group of people to share with, even if only virtually.
I think seeing your counselor is a fine idea, have you considered any other forms of support like meetings perhaps? Here on SR there are monthly and daily threads you can join in the newcomers area to find a group of people online who are on the same path - sometimes it's nice to have a home group of people to share with, even if only virtually.
aka Nesty
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Northern Vt.
Posts: 1,554
Maksim, You found a good place to get started to find ideas & help . Check out all the many threads & posts . Sounds like your making the right choice . Most of the time when drinking starts to affect relationships it's time to stop 
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,569
It's great to have you with us, Maksim. I'm glad you've admitted your drinking habits have changed & you no longer feel in control. That was the hardest part for me. You can do this!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: C.C. Ma.
Posts: 3,697
Hi.
I’m not saying you need AA, however it is a good place to go and listen to other peoples experiences. Look up open meetings and listen, perhaps talking to others will give you a perspective not yet seen.
It is spiritual based but not religious, you choose what you want.
BE WELL
I’m not saying you need AA, however it is a good place to go and listen to other peoples experiences. Look up open meetings and listen, perhaps talking to others will give you a perspective not yet seen.
It is spiritual based but not religious, you choose what you want.
BE WELL
tea enthusiast
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Liverpool, UK
Posts: 67
for me it's the same as ScottFromWI
I cannot drink responsibly. Regardless of what I tell myself before a night out, or how much I convince myself I'll be sensible and drink one or two, it never ever happens, and always always becomes an ugly drunken scene that those around me have to deal with.
The best thing I have found is to focus on the positive aspects of not drinking, and there are many!
we're all in the same boat here I guess so we're here to share experiences and encourage each other. That said, a counselling service is always a good idea too as obviously it's a more professional angle on things.
I cannot drink responsibly. Regardless of what I tell myself before a night out, or how much I convince myself I'll be sensible and drink one or two, it never ever happens, and always always becomes an ugly drunken scene that those around me have to deal with.
The best thing I have found is to focus on the positive aspects of not drinking, and there are many!
we're all in the same boat here I guess so we're here to share experiences and encourage each other. That said, a counselling service is always a good idea too as obviously it's a more professional angle on things.
Into the Void
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: California
Posts: 931
Hi Maksim,
I think I remember you posting here several months ago. If you're a computer science guy, I bet there's a good chance you are highly logical and live in your head. If so, and meetings are not doing it for you, you should read some of the recovery books out there. That's what i did as the basis for my plan. There are some threads here with many recommendations. Good luck!
I think I remember you posting here several months ago. If you're a computer science guy, I bet there's a good chance you are highly logical and live in your head. If so, and meetings are not doing it for you, you should read some of the recovery books out there. That's what i did as the basis for my plan. There are some threads here with many recommendations. Good luck!
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