justme

I know without a question my drinking is a problem. I don't need to drink or feel the urge to drink everyday. But when I do drink it's out of control I don't know how to stop without blacking out. I have had a handful of times were if I really tried I could stop durning the night but that just seems like why even bother to drink?! Too prove a point I'm able to be a social drinker... Yeah right! I do stupid and I'm capable of anything when I'm drinking is anyone like me? I thought about AA but I'm unsure are there meetings that have binge drinkers? I literally drink 2 times out of a month but I'm always so depressed for weeks because I'm ashamed of my behavior or because I can't remember!

Gottalife

Hi Justme,
In the first part of the book Alcoholics Anonymous is a section entitled "The Doctors Opinion" in it you will find exactly what you have described. AA calls it the phenomenon of craving and the doctor theorises that it is an allergic reaction to alcohol.

Modern science has shown that the liver of an alcoholic metabolises alcohol differently to normal person, and one of the by products, acetone (I think) causes an overwhelming craving, once alcohol is in the system, to consume more alcohol. This does not occur in normal drinkers.

But it is only half the picture. Armed with this knowledge, no sane person would take that first drink. The problem would be fixed. But for some reason the alcoholic seems unable to not take that first drink.

From what you have written, it might be a good idea to talk to some AA folks in your area. Have a listen to what they have to say and see how it fits with your experience. Maybe you will find the true nature of your problem.

Jsober

Just like you- binge drinker here as well. Once I started to drink I had little control over the amount I took in. I could control from time to time but that was just "fools gold" that led me to false beliefs and rationalizations. I could not stay stopped on my own; I tried many times.
I finally went to AA and it has helped me lots in recovery. It doesn't matter that I didn't drink everyday. That does not define alcoholic. What does is what happens when you do drink alcohol. I do recommend AA- it has been the only thing that has given me long term sobriety. Don't get hung up on the binge drinking, there are all kinds in AA. The only requirement is a desire to stop drinking. That's it. If you have a desire to stop and stay stopped you should check it out.

Dee74

You sound just like me justme.

You don't *have* to go to AA, but I think you need to do something, cos it gets worse from here not better...

OklaBH

dee is right..it only gets worse. I wish i would have caught it when i "only" drank here and there. if you suffer ANY consequences from drinking..it does not matter how often you drink...then it is a problem. Im very glad you reached out.