Jimboagust

It's perfectly understandable that recovering addicts focus entirely on the negative aspects of the substance they were abusing since this helps with the recovery process. But this always seems a bit disingenuous to me. Some of the reasons we used these things (like alcohol) were positive. There had to be some good in there, mingled in with all of the bad.

Did you lose something positive when you became sober? Something beautiful? Perhaps even just temporarily?

Personally, I have a much harder time connecting with people emotionally since I quit drinking. Life seems to have... plateaued. The lows are not nearly as low but the highs are for damn sure not nearly as high. Life went from being a De Palma film (either fanfuckingtastic or the biggest piece of crap you've ever seen) to being a Ron Howard film (which are almost always 'meh').

Amajorityofone

I don't think in terms of win or lose.

I think more in terms of seasons. I was born in spring. I partied pretty hard during the summer of my life. Now I am blooming in my fall. I loved the summer season of my life but I sure as hell have no desire to "re-live" it.

One of my fondest memories of my youth was when a group of friends and I all dropped LSD and then went into King's Island amusement park. We rode e-v-e-r-y-t-h-i-n-g.

I loved it!

Would I want to do that again?
Oh Hell no.....lol!

I am far more content today riding my bicycle through trails, reading a good book, educating my son, coaching his soccer team, tilling my garden or working on a new Chopin piece on my piano. Life, loves the liver of it. It's a symbiotic relationship if that makes sense to you. You only get out what you put in.

Maya Angelou once said..."If you don't like something, change it. If you can't change it, change your attitude."

I agree with that statement.

Vlad

I lost weight.

dwtbd

I miss the feeling, the being drunk. Not as much as I did when I first quit. The missing during the early struggles of ending an addiction is like being caught offshore in an undertow, sometimes you can get a foothold and make progress to the beach, but a giant surge pulls you back and for whatever reason you relent and let it take you back.

One day you find the determination and a 'break' in the current and you make it to shore, the relief of being out from under is almost so overwhelming you just take solace at being on the beach and catching your breath. Standing on the solid ground of the beach allows you turn and look back at the current, you can see it , and you know you can not safely enter the surf. Stick just your toe in and inextribly be drawn back and lose control in the surf.
The missing now is if I walk the beach and the gentle lap of the waves runs over me feet, the nice welcome feeling of the cool water an invitation to swim and enjoy, but the oceans are the oceans and they have their currents, only one way for me to avoid the tumult , pools are nice though

jdooner

How much time have you given it. I can say I have had the exact opposite experience. My life has been enhanced. I still get nostalgic thoughts of how nice a drink would be on a nice afternoon. But I know this is a mirage. The drink has lost its appeal because it was an will never be about a drink for me. For me its about escape. But what am I running from - me? Peace, at least for me, comes from acceptance.

Highs were about pushing the bounds to feel. This was never ending and required more. More drinks, more drugs, more sex, more things. It was exhausting. But if I am able to feel without pushing the bounds is that not a high?

I get off on watching my children. I did yoga the other day for the first time on a stand up paddle board. It was exhilarating.

To answer your question in the OP - I have lost much of the pain and anger that I carried for most of my life.

Soberwolf

This

Tiptree

Living sober is a trip!

Soberpotamus

The only thing I lost that can be considered a "positive" thing is the buzz. The instant gratification. And everything else I gained by quitting trumps that.

Ice-cream, meditation, exercising, back rubs, dog snuggles... all those are instant gratification I can now use as a substitute

zjw

I'm not the same person I once was. I'm not as laid back. I'm not the happy go lucky guy as much. I wont sit around and power house a pizza. I dont eat whatever. I"m a little more uptight i exercise to loosen up and relax.

the changes I've made are positive. but even my wife made mention that it would be nice if we could all sit down and eat the same thing. Or if when we ordered a pizza that i'd sit around and be a part of the family and endulge with everyone else etc..

I dont bend the rules as much anymore I'm a bit more disciplined i suppose is the word.

This approach works for me it keeps me happy and healthy and balanced as best I can. I need to learn moderation. while I could never moderate with alcohol I cant seem to moderate with much else in my life either. Its always all or nothing for me with whatever it is that i'm into.

That being said this has been a big change and there are many new things to like but there are a few things missed.

I'm ok with it tho and slowly everyone else is becoming ok with it too.

ru12

I often used alcohol to self-medicate my chronic depression. And it worked for quite a while. What I lost when I quit was an easy way to affect my mood. But through mindfulness and proper medication I am much better than when I was drinking.

Gazza

lost my girlfriend.... but she was alcoholic so it's actually a blessing.

lost a lot of weight. don't hang out with some drunk 'frenemys'.

And just the sensation of being drunk. But I guess it's not a loss so much as the feeling of being clear headed and not sick off sets it.

mfanch

Nothing positive or beautiful was lost. I used to think my career, but not even that. My life today is extraordinary. I couldn't make this sh1t up.

aborkie

Alcohol often acted as a laxative for me.

koko

I lost the feeling of wanting to die

Sudz No More

I actually did enjoy the taste of good beer regardless of the fact that it had alcohol in it. I have come to accept it though like a new allergy to a food I used to love. I just can't have it and I'm ok with that. I know it does me more harm than good.

ghostdad

Just a short list of things I lost when I quit alcohol 43 days ago:

Lost a lot of weight.
Lost the need to puke every morning.
Lost the need to argue with my wife almost every night.
Lost the disgusted feeling I felt because I let alcohol control my life.
Lost the need to sleep until noon on weekends.
Lost the need to take four Advils and a Pepcid every morning.
Lost the disappointed look on my Doctors face when my blood results came in.
Lost the need for alcohol to have a good time at a social events.
Lost my drinking buddies.
Lost my fear that alcohol will kill me.