flman

Hi everyone. I'm new to the forum. Im a 30 year old male and I'm 7 days sober now. I'm not sure if I was a full blown alcoholic but then again maybe I'm in denial. I started drinking at night time bc i would get super anxious and nervous and and a glass of wine would allow me to relax. The problem is that once I had once glass I started drinking the whole bottle before I knew it. When I woke up the anxiety was even more severe bc of the hangover. So I would deal with the anxiety until the night came again and then start the process over again. I didn't drink every night, but probably had alcohol 3-5 days out of the week. On the weekends I often went to clubs and dinners and had many vodka tonics. I feel like I have missed many good times bc of horrible hangovers. The problem is I work in the entertainment business and i'm often in nightclubs or social events. Does anyone have any advice on how to deal with my addiction in these social settings? Tricks to staying sober during stressful situations?

Sanantoniosober

Remember how you feel afterwards. For me, I had to start thinking about alcohol as something I was allergic to. Like a poison.

As long as I remember that, I can deal with being around drinkers.

As for the anxiety, that just takes time. Is it something you could/need to see a doctor about?

flman

Thank u. That's def a good idea. The hangovers are awful! Guess it will take some practice and getting use toS I'm currently seeing a doctor and am getting Zoloft for the anxiety. I'm gonna set up a new apt to see if we can maybe tweak the med bc of the nighttime anxiety.

Dee74

Hi Flman

I was a gigging musician - it is hard to stay clean and sober in that industry but I know some people who've done it. I did it - but I had to leave the industry for a while.


you need a rock solid commitment to staying sober - you need to remember always that there's no such thing as 'just one glass' the way we drink.

You need to have contingency plans for every likely scenario - think about what would you do if everyone else is drinking and you want one?

what would you do if you're offered a drink?

what if someone wants you to drink specifically as a celebration - how do you handle that?

If you can't come up with any answers yourself, support is not a bad idea - living a sober life requires changes and change needs support - there's a lot of it here and in other places like AA or other recovery groups, or counselling.

Like I said I left the industry for a while - I was never able to say no or resist peer pressure. It took me a few months to realise I was putting other peoples needs and wants before my own.

Once you accept that alcohol and you are a toxic mix, and once you decide you prefer being sober, then nothing or noone can touch you - it's the getting there that's the hard bit - but like I say - tons of support here

CactusJill

Flman... my AH is going through the same thing. He is a bartender and shift manager at a popular restaurant in town and the entire restaurant culture is geared toward drinking, especially where he works. It has kept him from putting more than a few days together at a time. In my opinion, he should quit but he won't because he loves the job.

I don't have an answer for him, or for anyone in that position because I am a professor and although the drinking culture is part of my job, it is a heck of a lot easier to avoid!!

I agree with Dee though - contingency plans do help. On the occasions when I am obligated to go to an event where alcohol will be present I coach myself to deal with the most likely situations and I have an excuse ready if I feel like I can't handle it.

flman

Thanks Dee74 and CactusJill. I've never really thought about having a plan ahead of time in those situations. It is true the whole industry seems to revolve around drinking. I really wanna stay sober and I appreciate the support. I'm new to this....never been to AA OR in any support group. I can really see how this helps.

diffingo911

FLman-What I find that Really Helps, is how Invaluable the Collective Recovery Consciousness comes together here...There are MANY Personalities, Perspectives and Life Experiences to Draw from...I am learning every day and Very Happy I found this Place !

mick3580

I know no tricks for staying sober other than following a path of recovery. Aa worked for me.

Mags1

Hi flman and welcome to SR.

I live a stones throw from a pub, it lured me for years and called my name. Now I don't see it there as a pub just a building , the luring was all me giving in to what I craved, needed to feed on.

KateL

Yeah, the hangovers were enough to put me off in the end. Keep posting x