alphaomega

Looking for experiences to help a friend who is watching me recover and starting to contemplate the same (YAY!).

She doesn't think she can do it at home with her kids and isn't ready to get on this board despite my relentless insistence, convinced someone will recognize her (kinda famous).

My only experience is with SR, AA and toughing it out at home so I'm not qualified to speak in regards to how it works.

Any insight and experiences would be most appreciated.

rockindog

I am 48 days into doing it myself. A little talking amongst friends and family on the inside and some reading and posting here. A long way to go, I know, but a good start.

Dee74

The only thing I ever used was SR.

I'm not famous but noones ever tracked me down here
I find it's as anonymous as you want it to be.

D

longbeachone

My kids were still at home, and my marriage intact (barely) when I finally quit. We had just finished putting 2 of our kids through college, and were about to send the last one, so money was beyond tight. My medical insurance paid for a three day detox, and after that my husband found a women's sober living house, and I moved in there.

I've spoken about this often on this forum, so feel free to skip the following paragraphs. To this day I am thankful from the bottom of my heart for my time there, because it was such a good experience. There were a total of seven women, all ages, and one counselor living there. It was a Christian Sober Living home, which was fine because I'm quite religious. I shared a room with a girl that is still a good friend to me. Our day began at 8:00 with an hour long reflection/prayer/readings meeting with everyone present. Then some women went to work, some to other meetings, or as I did, stayed home and read tons of recovery material, journaled and worked on some little projects, like painting and crochet. We each had a set of chores to do, and I tried to get an hour of exercise in every day.

At 5:30 we held our own 12 Step meeting for an hour, then ate dinner together. Each evening, we attended as a group a local meeting (the house had a van), either an Alcoholics Anonymous, Celebrate Recovery, Church, Step Study or one of a few other choices. We would usually stop afterward for some frozen yogurt or something, then get home around ten and go to bed. Saturday was a free day, and my husband would come and take me to lunch or a movie. Believe it or not, the cost was $500 per month, and I stayed for two months. We supplied our own food. I look back on this time with so much affection, so grateful that I was able to experience everything. I've been sober now for over four years.

So, that's one possibility. I'm in Southern California, but I know that there are sober living houses all over the USA, and Canada as well. My husband did some online research, and also got some names from the hospital. Please send me a private message if you have any question. Best of luck to you both!

nomis

Exercise, SR and counseling.

mick3580

It is possible to do aa without going to meetings. I don't require those I sponsor to attend meetings. I'm sure there are others who are the same.

FourSeasons

SR all the way!!!! Truly the way to go!! Tell her to create user name and join in!!

silentrun

Just SR for me.

steve-in-kville

Besides coming here, I tapered in my own way. Hence my withdrawal was minimal. I went from drinking 7 days a week, to just weekends. Then only drank on Saturday and then not at all (last weekend was my last).

So far so good.

dotboston

I needed professional detox, as my level of drinking was causing very bad withdrawals. My first "attempt" I tried to keep things private, and only told a few close friends. I used the social services at the hospital where my doctor is located, and was referred to a hospital to detox. Well, it turned out to be a psych ward, and was an awful experience.

When I got out, I came home and drank tequila straight out of the bottle that I had left in the cabinet. I swore off the hard stuff... I'd only drink beer and wine. Well, we know how that goes... Within four weeks I was a mess and out of control. The shame of having wasted a $5000 detox on my insurance and being in such a horrible situation again was terrible.

My second attempt came out of desperation, and I did research this time. I found an actual alcohol rehab facility, and went for my second detox for five days. This time I was open to my family, my friends, and even work that I needed help, and bad. Many of them didn't realize how bad I was off, I live alone.

The second attemp was much better. The detox staff were amazing, mostly recovering alcoholics and we were provided with council, aa meetings and a follow up plan.

I then put everything into my recovery. I requested a medical leave of absence from work for 30 days. I began seeing a private therapist, and also joined a recovery support group at a local health facility. I started exercising, and even doing acupuncture for post acute withdrawals. I also started on campral, a medication for craving control.

Plus, I started to go to aa meetings and reading sober recovery!

It's been 21 months now! Things aren't easy all the time, but it was the best thing I have ever done. It was also the hardest thing I have ever done.

I highly recommend taking the approach of multiple plans of attack.

PhaseTwo

How would anyone know who she is? It's not like her username has to be her actual name.

Eddiebuckle

I did six weeks inpatient rehab, followed by AA once I got home. Although I was skeptical of AA and the whole 90 in 90 thing that was suggested, I ended up doing about 350 meetings in my first year. I still go to three or four meetings a week & will have four years in December.

freshstart57

You can tell your friend that her doubt in herself and her ability is one way that her addiction is showing itself. She most definitely can quit drinking. This lack of self confidence is serving only to keep her drinking, one day at a time. It is all part of the lie of addiction.

There need be no 'toughing it out' when saying goodbye forever to a life threatening habit, just an ironclad resolve and a willingness to accept a life without the hangovers, blackouts, depression, anxiety, shame, depression and illness.

SR is a welcoming place, with no means for real world identification if she does not wish it. There is a ready welcome wagon lined up and waiting, and of all times to decide to quit drinking, now is the best!

Caldus

I went straight to AA meetings. No treatment or anything else. I'm now over a year sober thanks to the program in the people in it. I'm assuming you also live in Chicago based on your profile. There are thousands of AA meetings throughout Chicago to check out.

Coldfusion

I spent less than a week at an in-patient detox center. It was just necessary for me to be away from everything for that first week of withdrawal. I was monitored and given an anti-anxiety medication. The surroundings were a distraction from my symptoms, and I was supported by those around me.

dox

Only AA for me. It works if you work it . . .
My sponsor went to in-patient rehab. He says, in hindsight, that he needed to be removed from alcohol.
Your friend won't be recognised here if she only reads. Then, she might try some careful posting without personal details that would identify her, if she chooses.