The Automatic CoPilot of an Alcoholic's Brain
Mini Novel Post Writer
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Maine
Posts: 3,649
The Automatic CoPilot of an Alcoholic's Brain
When you get sober what becomes clear is sometimes so mind boggling. There are things that are evident that come forward that show you just how much you lived in a fog bubble and didn't participate in life. Then sometimes there are some realizations that just blow you away.
It's a bit of over thinking on my part but something happened yesterday that displayed just how the mind of an alcoholic works and its automatic co pilot. It's the total absence and removal of any inkling of realizing that you consistently provide cover for your brain to hide from the fact that there's any problem with your drinking. It's also a display of how self centered the alcoholic mind is.
For the purpose of this post there are two females. Jane and Jill. Jane works in an office below me and Jill works across the street. These two have been friends since they were kids. I often see Jane when I'm out on break. She told me mid week that Jill has a hornets nest in her backyard and Jane is allergic to stings.
Here's what Jane said to me yesterday:
"Jill wants me to come over her house for happy hour tonight, we always get together at her house for drinks after work on Friday. I told her that I'm not coming over after work tonight and that we need to go out somewhere. I'm not subjecting myself to those hornets, even though I have an epi pen. She's pissed off because she said that if we go out somewhere that we won't be able to drink as much and will have to limit ourselves."
Immediately my sober logic kicked in. Here's the rest of the conversation:
Me: Wait a minute, you said that you always go to her house for happy hour, right?
Jane: Yeah, every Friday.
Me: How do you get there?
Jane: I drive.
Me: So that means that you have to drive home right?
Jane: That's right.
Me: So the statement "If WE go out somewhere WE won't be able to drink as much and will have to limit OURSELVES" is not really her worry is it?
Jane: I don't get what you mean
Me: If you always go to her house and you always have to drive then don't YOU always have to watch how much you have to drink?
Jane: yeah
Me: So wouldn't the correct statement that Jill should be making is "If WE go out somewhere I won't be able to drink as much and will have to limit MYSELF?" Because you have to limit yourself anyway right?
Jane" WOW, yeah, you're right!
Above is a fine example of an alcoholic brain. By including both people in the statement of limitation it removes the need to consider that "you" are worried about "yourself" and it has nothing to do with the other person.
To only include yourself would imply that you can't control your drinking and don't want to control your drinking.
Does this make sense? Or am I just overthinking it? I just found the discovery of the use of words interesting.
It's a bit of over thinking on my part but something happened yesterday that displayed just how the mind of an alcoholic works and its automatic co pilot. It's the total absence and removal of any inkling of realizing that you consistently provide cover for your brain to hide from the fact that there's any problem with your drinking. It's also a display of how self centered the alcoholic mind is.
For the purpose of this post there are two females. Jane and Jill. Jane works in an office below me and Jill works across the street. These two have been friends since they were kids. I often see Jane when I'm out on break. She told me mid week that Jill has a hornets nest in her backyard and Jane is allergic to stings.
Here's what Jane said to me yesterday:
"Jill wants me to come over her house for happy hour tonight, we always get together at her house for drinks after work on Friday. I told her that I'm not coming over after work tonight and that we need to go out somewhere. I'm not subjecting myself to those hornets, even though I have an epi pen. She's pissed off because she said that if we go out somewhere that we won't be able to drink as much and will have to limit ourselves."
Immediately my sober logic kicked in. Here's the rest of the conversation:
Me: Wait a minute, you said that you always go to her house for happy hour, right?
Jane: Yeah, every Friday.
Me: How do you get there?
Jane: I drive.
Me: So that means that you have to drive home right?
Jane: That's right.
Me: So the statement "If WE go out somewhere WE won't be able to drink as much and will have to limit OURSELVES" is not really her worry is it?
Jane: I don't get what you mean
Me: If you always go to her house and you always have to drive then don't YOU always have to watch how much you have to drink?
Jane: yeah
Me: So wouldn't the correct statement that Jill should be making is "If WE go out somewhere I won't be able to drink as much and will have to limit MYSELF?" Because you have to limit yourself anyway right?
Jane" WOW, yeah, you're right!
Above is a fine example of an alcoholic brain. By including both people in the statement of limitation it removes the need to consider that "you" are worried about "yourself" and it has nothing to do with the other person.
To only include yourself would imply that you can't control your drinking and don't want to control your drinking.
Does this make sense? Or am I just overthinking it? I just found the discovery of the use of words interesting.
Laozi Old Man
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Detroit, MI
Posts: 6,665
Originally Posted by LadyBlue0527 
To only include yourself would imply that you can't control your drinking and don't want to control your drinking.
Does this make sense? Or am I just overthinking it? I just found the discovery of the use of words interesting.
Does this make sense? Or am I just overthinking it? I just found the discovery of the use of words interesting.
If I enjoyed my drinking - I could not control it.
quat
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: terra (mostly)firma
Posts: 4,823
That kind of manipulation si not resevered for the 'alcoholic' mind.
It happens all the time, consider the same conversation between teetotaling bbq'ers.
"Lets have it at your place, its the nearest to all our friends" really means if you have it , I save propane and don't have to clean up. Same method same result, nothing special
It happens all the time, consider the same conversation between teetotaling bbq'ers.
"Lets have it at your place, its the nearest to all our friends" really means if you have it , I save propane and don't have to clean up. Same method same result, nothing special
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: San Diego
Posts: 4,451
Interesting post, LB. Jill reminds me of myself. I wonder if she continues to drink on Fridays after Jane drives home. That's what I would have done... all the while patting myself on the back for hosting my friend. Such a generous soul, was I!
Of course by the end, I didn't want anyone to come over. Even friends became limits on my drinking. To get my fill I would have to secretly guzzle extras while out of sight, in the kitchen. What a drag my friends had become, forcing me to hide like that! (Sorry to say my alcoholic mind was not only self-centered, but self-righteous... not a good combination, lol.)
Of course by the end, I didn't want anyone to come over. Even friends became limits on my drinking. To get my fill I would have to secretly guzzle extras while out of sight, in the kitchen. What a drag my friends had become, forcing me to hide like that! (Sorry to say my alcoholic mind was not only self-centered, but self-righteous... not a good combination, lol.)
quat
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: terra (mostly)firma
Posts: 4,823
Ladybug
I just reread you post , and I am going to apologize for the flippant nature of my implication
You never imply that the 'alcoholic' co pilot exists in a non drinker, I inferred it
I see equating 'alcoholic' tendencies in non drinkers, those that do not drink on purpose included, as AV
I just reread you post , and I am going to apologize for the flippant nature of my implication
You never imply that the 'alcoholic' co pilot exists in a non drinker, I inferred it
I see equating 'alcoholic' tendencies in non drinkers, those that do not drink on purpose included, as AV
Mini Novel Post Writer
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Maine
Posts: 3,649
Thanks for all the responses. I guess that this is something that I never noticed and I only probably noticed it because it dealt directly with alcohol.
dwtbd, I didn't think that you were flippant at all! In fact, I completely got exactly what you were saying that this goes on in daily life alcohol or no alcohol.
dwtbd, I didn't think that you were flippant at all! In fact, I completely got exactly what you were saying that this goes on in daily life alcohol or no alcohol.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
