NorweiganWood

I'm really annoyed. I feel like I'm supposed to be flowers & sunshine everyday now that I'm in AA, and I'm not allowed to express any negative emotion.

Of course my family doesn't understand the disease & everything that I have to deal with so they see my expressions of emotion other than happiness as something bratty, selfish, and ultimately frivolous.

^This frustrates me even more because I have no friends to vent to, and I can't necessarily write anything because my parents snoop and have read my journals before.

Another really frustrating and annoying thing is that my parents have taken my phone (as a consequence & because i'm "entitled") so I have to use my sisters phone to call my sponsor, which I can't do very often.

When I do get to speak to my sponsor I feel like she just tells me that I need to change my behavior, etc. & she talks a lot so I never get to just vent and I'm literally about to go crazy.

On top of all of ^ that I'm experiencing so much uncertainty about what my summer and fall will look like & I feel generally inferior in all aspects of life. I'm just overwhelmed, annoyed, and such a mess and I don't know what to do.

Cc77

Vent,vent,vent!!!! You are in the right place!!! Talk on here!!! I'll listen! We all will! The people on this sight are awesome and genuine. I have been sober for 30 days, attend AA and I promise you I am not doing cartwheels but I am sober and that is a start! You are in the right place

Bigndfan175

Hard to comment without knowing your situation - what's your plan to work things out with your folks? I was told by my sponsor to listen first and be open to having my motives probed for defects of character. If you trust your sponsor just listen and learn , if you don't you better get one whom you do trust Bc just wait til your 4th step it's a doozie

paul99

Sounds like you're going through a phase where trust is an issue with your parents, and I am sure they have good reason for it. I went through the same thing with my wife and family at first when I got sober. it takes time to rebuild that trust. Sponsors are there to guide you through the steps and to help you along your journey, pointing out the landmarks and to share with you what has helped them on their journeys. They aren't there to listen to you dump about whatever it is, necessarily. If it has to do with sobriety and working on the solution rather than living in the problem, then we are all ears. But of course, we love to vent, don't we?

I think the snooping of journals, etc. is something perhaps you can speak to your folks about. Let them know your desire to have a safe place to talk to someone (perhaps another person from AA) who understands and who can listen. Is a therapist an option?

Keep hitting the meetings, continue the step work...it gets better.
and yes, you can vent here

sunrise1

It's good to know that you are in AA... one of the first reasons I fell in love with AA was that I was with a bunch of people who shared my experiences. Many of whom would share about what you described above. So- an AA contact would be a definite place to start when you need to vent. People who are not alcoholics simply don't get it- - and many times never will. Work with your friends and family to the best of your ability and understand that they too need to change perspective eventually but there is nothing you can do about them- you can only work on you.

Best.

hypochondriac

Glad you can vent here Have you tried sharing at an AA meeting too? I am not one for sharing myself but I always thought that one of the great thing about AA meetings is that you can share without anyone interrupting you. That must be a great place to vent! I can understand how frustrating it must be if every time you say how you feel someone offers a solution but that is what people who care tend to do. One thing I found really helped me was reading books by recovering alcoholics. I always found I connect better with books than people so it helped me feel less alone x