Tetra

It started snowing here today. I am looking out the window at the snowfall with a cup of hot chocolate, and started to think, "wouldn't it be nice if this was a hot whiskey or something instead?" Is this normal? I have been sober for 1 year and almost 4 months. Actually, I am finding things tough. College is on Easter break, and I am at home with my parents. I would love a drink right now. I was shopping yesterday and spent 50 euros on books and a box of chocolates to keep me busy...happy reading!

least

Only that I'm glad I don't drink anymore.

AB588

I still do. Good for you for not succumbing to your thoughts! Hope you have a pleasant break.

FBL

At nearly 4 years sober, I don't think about it at all. The thoughts really seemed to diminish with time. The last time I seriously gave it a thought was probably about a year ago and even then, it was just a fleeting thing. My sober life is too good to mess up.

Vastreaction

I'm only 8 days in, so I think about it a lot.

I think about alcohol when I perform activities that I used to do drunk. Which is really sad that some of them are so anti-social, but whatever. I would watch movies and drink, get drunk to make a video game more fun, I even used to READ drunk until it got too hard to focus on the words.

I've been over-compensating with food and non-alcoholic beverages, but I will deal with that little monster in its own time. I wish you the best in your recovery

LDT

8 days is still early...... Give yourself some time. As FBL said....the thoughts do diminish with time. I think about it only because I'm grateful I no longer drink, and am daily amazed at how lovely life can be without it.

Boleo

It's been a long time since I thought about drinkin or not-drinkin. In fact, I would say not-drinkin has nothing to do with why I am sober today.

When I surrendered the idea that I could some how "achieve sobriety", the obsession to drink left me root and branch. I now realize that sobriety is a byproduct of spiritual fitness. I don't even choose to be sober. Sobriety just comes naturally so long as I stay spiritually fit.

"Sought after virtue is not true virtue."
- Laozi

Toss

I think about it every morning when I get up, when I have to remember that I am grougy because it's early, not because I am hung over.

I think about it driving to work when I see the "Don't lose it all to alcohol" treatment center sign.

I think about it on the way home, when I pass the many establishments I would purchase my 12 pack of beer, which was a daily occurance.

I think about it at night, when I'm helping the kids do homework or having a conversation with my wife, because I am now engaged instead of in a stuper.

I think about it when I lay down at night, thankful I am not a slave to a substance, that I can have some sort of pride about myself.

You could say I think about it alot, mostly in the background of my mind. Like a bad distant memory, of something that is gone and will never come back. Thinking about it for me is good, because the bad memories make me never want to taste alcohol again.

Jsober

Over two years and I still think about it from time to time. Not as often and the urges are not as strong as before. Sometimes they are strong but they do pass and I am always glad I didn't drink. I'm not too hard on myself for still thinking about it. I'm alcoholic, I'm going to get those feelings sometimes.

Greenwitchwest

Hi! I've been reading in this forum for a while now and finally subscribed. I have 10 weeks sober and experienced a profound level of discomfort in the beer isle of the grocery store today. I ended up drinking more beer toward the end of my struggle then anything else. I liked to think it was because I was getting closer to quitting, but in reality it had more to do with black outs and stomach pain. I remember all of the pain, but time is healing my wounds. I'm thinking a drink sounds nice again as the bad memories fade. Holding on to the intense feelings surrounding these memories is opposite everything I've believed in for so long that now I'm automatically letting go of bad feelings that are protecting me from "thinking about drinking". I'm wondering if anyone else has experienced this. I feel just as strongly about remaining sober and don't believe I have it in me to relapse (so done) I'm just a lot more uncomfortable now that the thought of a drink doesn't instantly repulse me and make me want to cry. This is all so counterintuitive!

FeelingGreat

Hi Tetra, I think about it a lot, but not in a craving way so much now. I'm coming up for a year now and I said it would be a year without alcohol, so it's been on my mind.
I think you just have to discipline your thoughts and deliberately distract yourself.
I suggest you have a look at the current thread in the Secular Connections on 'What does your AV say to you?' It's funny, and you'll realise you're not the only one.

Vandermast

I guess that i do think about it a lot..but i have surrendered..i was sober 4 7years..sheen wore off though..drank 4 2 years..thnugh sober again now :-P

TDInstall

I think about it a lot. I am four months sober, which now bizarrely does not feel like a long time. I feel things getting more difficult for me...

laurie6781

What I found as I progressing my recovery, is that the 'thought' of drinking or having a drink was a holdover from my past behaviors. After all my solution to every thing 'good' or 'bad' was to have a drink or drinks.

However, I soon came to realize that it was just a 'thought' flitting through and on out of my brain. Old habit.

Now these many many years later, I can say that once in a great while (very great) I can still get that fleeting thought flitting through my brain. Today I know and have known for quite some time that it is just a remnant from my 'old' way of handling things. The 'thought will be there one second and gone the next. Usually happening when I am in some kind if 'stress' whether that stress is good or bad.

As you continue to grow in your recovery, I believe you too will realize that it is just 'a thought' flitting through your brain, from an old way of how you used to handle life.

J M H O

Love and hugs,

fini

i don't think about drinking at all if by thinking about it you mean debating whether to do it.
i DO think about alcoholism a lot, drinking in THAT way.

LadyinBC

I've been sober 8 months now and I still do think about it sometimes. One guy I know has been sober for 26 years and every once in awhile it pops into his mind too.

I definately don't think about it as much as I use to, but sometimes if I'm watching something or reading something it enters my mind. Or something will happen and I'll think to myself "i need a drink".

I think it's normal.

hypochondriac

Drinking was my default setting so yeah, it comes up frequently, but I just try to dismiss the thoughts as much as possible. I don't think that I am pining after it though, I'm not sat here thinking I wish I could drink. I'm glad I am sober but I think it takes some time to reset the default setting. I'm a little over a year now, I'm hoping it will come up less often as my life changes.

FeelingGreat

For those who are bothered by these intrusive remnant thoughts, I found slowing down and concentrating on my breathing for a few breaths works miracles. I think if thoughts are challenging or disturbing us, our breathing follows, and controlling that also controls the thoughts.

hayley86

I'm six months sober now, I was a heavy drinker and was told I had to seriously reduce my drinking for health reasons which was a no go for me so I stopped drinking completely. I don't find myself wishing I could drink anymore a stint in the hospital was thankfully enough to shake me out of the denial that my drinking was "normal". I do sometimes dream that im drinking again so I guess the thoughts must still be there in some ways but i also think this is my brain reminding me how miserable and lonely i was when i was drinking and its always a relief to wake up with a clear conscience. My life has transformed dramatically over the last six months I finally feel like im myself again and I don't feel like im constantly looking over my shoulder and feeling guilty about my behaviour.

2granddaughters

In AA we often say "The first year is a gift".

All the best.

Bob R