Newbie - Maybe I don't really belong here?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: North Carolina
Posts: 5
Newbie - Maybe I don't really belong here?
My first post.
Let me start by saying that I've been reading the detox experiences of many of you, and I am in awe of what you have accomplished! You are amazing!
I'm a complete lightweight, and maybe I don't even belong here. I'm 53 and I was never a drinker until about 18 months ago when I went to visit a friend and decided to get drunk for the first time, just to see what it felt like. Turned out, I liked the feeling, so when I returned home I started having a couple of drinks every evening, rum being my favorite.
My problem was that I would chug my drinks and then get up and get another one right away. One evening I came to on the living room floor with no memory of how I got there. I could barely get back into my chair. That scared me, especially when I saw the huge bruise on my shoulder. I was lucky I missed hitting the coffee table with my head.
I kept drinking, though, going to bed drunk every night. I found that drinking shortened the long, lonely evenings. I never had a hangover - ever.
I decided to try wine, which I had never liked, and that became my drink of choice, although I continued drinking rum at times.
I was shocked when I went to my doctor after 6 months and found that my triglycerides were high. I've never had cholesterol issues. I knew that meant I was damaging my liver.
Still kept drinking, though. I got up to drinking 2 bottles of white wine in an evening then falling into bed. Sometimes I'd get up in the morning and find that I'd done odd things like making salad dressing or cleaning the bathroom.
Still, no hangover. Sometimes I'd have a slight headache, but as soon as I got out of bed it would go away. The worst part for me was the dizziness and mental fog - I guess you could call that a hangover, but I could function through it, and it would go away by mid-morning.
Finally, one evening I'd had 3 beers along with my blood pressure medication, and when I went into the kitchen I fainted and twisted my leg, spraining my ankle. That convinced me I had to stop before I did something really stupid.
It's 48 hours since my last drink, and I've had no symptoms of withdrawal. In fact, I feel great - much clearer mentally.
All the same, even if I wasn't truly addicted, I crave it and want nothing more than to hop into the car and go get a bottle of wine.
I just want to be a normal person without a dark secret.
Again, I'm so impressed with everyone's endurance and tenacity. Congratulations and thank you for sharing your experiences!
Let me start by saying that I've been reading the detox experiences of many of you, and I am in awe of what you have accomplished! You are amazing!
I'm a complete lightweight, and maybe I don't even belong here. I'm 53 and I was never a drinker until about 18 months ago when I went to visit a friend and decided to get drunk for the first time, just to see what it felt like. Turned out, I liked the feeling, so when I returned home I started having a couple of drinks every evening, rum being my favorite.
My problem was that I would chug my drinks and then get up and get another one right away. One evening I came to on the living room floor with no memory of how I got there. I could barely get back into my chair. That scared me, especially when I saw the huge bruise on my shoulder. I was lucky I missed hitting the coffee table with my head.
I kept drinking, though, going to bed drunk every night. I found that drinking shortened the long, lonely evenings. I never had a hangover - ever.
I decided to try wine, which I had never liked, and that became my drink of choice, although I continued drinking rum at times.
I was shocked when I went to my doctor after 6 months and found that my triglycerides were high. I've never had cholesterol issues. I knew that meant I was damaging my liver.
Still kept drinking, though. I got up to drinking 2 bottles of white wine in an evening then falling into bed. Sometimes I'd get up in the morning and find that I'd done odd things like making salad dressing or cleaning the bathroom.
Still, no hangover. Sometimes I'd have a slight headache, but as soon as I got out of bed it would go away. The worst part for me was the dizziness and mental fog - I guess you could call that a hangover, but I could function through it, and it would go away by mid-morning.
Finally, one evening I'd had 3 beers along with my blood pressure medication, and when I went into the kitchen I fainted and twisted my leg, spraining my ankle. That convinced me I had to stop before I did something really stupid.
It's 48 hours since my last drink, and I've had no symptoms of withdrawal. In fact, I feel great - much clearer mentally.
All the same, even if I wasn't truly addicted, I crave it and want nothing more than to hop into the car and go get a bottle of wine.
I just want to be a normal person without a dark secret.
Again, I'm so impressed with everyone's endurance and tenacity. Congratulations and thank you for sharing your experiences!
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,444
Hi writer3
I think a lot of us get hung up on the volume we drank, or how often, or how long, we drank for ...
but me? I think the important things to focus on are what happens to you when you drink? is it a problem? do you want to fix it?
It's not a comparative problem - it's about you and your experience and your life...your problem
I think you'll fit in here just fine
Welcome
D
I think a lot of us get hung up on the volume we drank, or how often, or how long, we drank for ...
but me? I think the important things to focus on are what happens to you when you drink? is it a problem? do you want to fix it?
It's not a comparative problem - it's about you and your experience and your life...your problem
I think you'll fit in here just fine
Welcome
D
Member
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Ireland
Posts: 1,641
Welcome Writer,
As Dee says.
Also, the injuries would worry me.
If you live alone, you could be in big trouble and no one would be around to help.
two bottles of wine, blackouts, think PROGRESSION.
Why did you never drink?
Family history?
As Dee says.
Also, the injuries would worry me.
If you live alone, you could be in big trouble and no one would be around to help.
two bottles of wine, blackouts, think PROGRESSION.
Why did you never drink?
Family history?
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,569
Welcome writer! If unpredictable & disturbing things happen when you drink, you probably shouldn't. Your situation is a bit unusual, but I've known two people who never drank much until they retired. Then with their newfound freedom - not having to be anywhere or do anything specific - they developed a huge dependency on alcohol. We don't want that to happen to you - so it's good you're asking these questions now. Glad to have you here with us!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: North Carolina
Posts: 5
Thank you for all of your answers!
Hollyanne - I didn't drink because I didn't like the buzzed feeling, and I was in a religious cult that forbade drunkenness.
I left the cult 8 years ago. I would have the occasional drink, but never more than 2. I was just curious about how it would feel to get drunk.
My father appeared to have a drinking problem, drinking wine every night, the ever-present gallon jug of Gallo burgundy, but I never saw him drunk. He died of esophageal cancer, and before that he was diagnosed with cirrhosis - both of which indicate a drinking problem.
My mother, on the other hand, couldn't even get addicted to nicotine. She smoked back in the 40s and 50s because of peer pressure, but one day she decided she didn't want to do it any longer and just stopped. No problem. My father went through agony quitting smoking.
Hollyanne - I didn't drink because I didn't like the buzzed feeling, and I was in a religious cult that forbade drunkenness.
I left the cult 8 years ago. I would have the occasional drink, but never more than 2. I was just curious about how it would feel to get drunk.
My father appeared to have a drinking problem, drinking wine every night, the ever-present gallon jug of Gallo burgundy, but I never saw him drunk. He died of esophageal cancer, and before that he was diagnosed with cirrhosis - both of which indicate a drinking problem.
My mother, on the other hand, couldn't even get addicted to nicotine. She smoked back in the 40s and 50s because of peer pressure, but one day she decided she didn't want to do it any longer and just stopped. No problem. My father went through agony quitting smoking.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 29
I believe if you analyze and think too much about what's happening, how much, am I this or that...then stopping now would be best. You're using so much energy worring over something that doesn't need to be worried about. You don't *need* to drink but when you do, harmful things happen so remove it from your life so you don't have to let that worry consume you
Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Serene In Dixie
Posts: 36,740
Welcome to our recovery community
And yes! you do belong here with us as your drinking was
beginning to cause you problems
Yes...you too can win over alcohol and live a healthier sober life.
I quit drinking around your age....and the last 23 years I've
had health issues not related to alcohol. Had I still been a
drinker....some of the procedures that keep me going would not
have been possible.
Fact is...we wear out our bodies as we age...putting alcohol in our
system is simply a bad idea for everyone...
I looked like that holdin beer
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 627
Hi Writer,
I am new here too
I can think of many mornings when I woke with bruises. I wasn't sure how I got them. It wasn't that I blacked out. I think I was just too drunk to feel hurt at the time. Man, I hate that feeling of not knowing exactly what happened the night before. One time I woke up with burnt out cig on the carpet. I was lucky I didn't catch the house on fire.
thank you for sharing -it strengthens my resolve.
I am new here too
I can think of many mornings when I woke with bruises. I wasn't sure how I got them. It wasn't that I blacked out. I think I was just too drunk to feel hurt at the time. Man, I hate that feeling of not knowing exactly what happened the night before. One time I woke up with burnt out cig on the carpet. I was lucky I didn't catch the house on fire.
thank you for sharing -it strengthens my resolve.
~sb
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: MD
Posts: 15,967
A physical addiction isn't required to have alcoholism. Long term drinking is also not a requirement.
Most people don't chug liquor, black out, or wake up with bruises, or mix alcohol in those quantities with blood pressure medication. chugging liquor or wine is enough to shut down a person's body.
Bottom line is, do you think you have a problem with alcohol? Only you can decide this.
Welcome and glad you are here!
Most people don't chug liquor, black out, or wake up with bruises, or mix alcohol in those quantities with blood pressure medication. chugging liquor or wine is enough to shut down a person's body.
Bottom line is, do you think you have a problem with alcohol? Only you can decide this.
Welcome and glad you are here!
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