ressurectJ

ok so here goes my story just bare with me if at any point in this article i may seem all over the place .my memory isn't very good these days ever since i been trying to quit drinking .i find sometimes that i will do something and then all of a sudden wont remember whether i did it .(i digress)
my story start's when i was 18 i was in my jr year of high school .i get invited to this Senior graduation party .the senior who they were throwing the party for's parents bought a huge keg of beer for everyone including the kid's there,Just as long as everyone didn't drive home .(i actually think key's were taken at the door ) any ways it was in spring time so it was hot out and the whole day we just basically hung out in the back yard playing games socializing and of course drinking.

They were giving us those big keg cups i can remember first sipping the beer just nursing it .i wasn't at all a big fan of beer still aren't ,well just the flavored kind .i remember drinking my first cup .Some of my friends their gave me a bit of grief about sipping .Back then it was more of like a competition who could drink the most.that way there would be drinking stories the following week at school .it was a badge of honor the more you could drink or hold your booze in .i hated the taste of beer but as they say "when in rome ". so i did . i downed my first cup grabbed something to eat and they had a moon walker thingy there which i got into for a little while .

i almost tossed my food up being their off that one beer the cups were those 12oz ones .I did what i could to put some amount of space between each beer.i mostly was doing it to keep up with the other's plus i didn't want to seem like square being invited to a senior kegger smashed off one beer .that day/night it was all about pushing it to the limit .my buddy who i got a ride to this party with was a typical animal he was downing them big time .So i started trying to down another it got less difficult then by my third or fourth .we got into a volley ball game.which i dont know how i got through the game with that much beer in me .during that game we'd stop for a break and we didn't drink water we just started chugging beer .i remember refilling my cup to the top for the fifth time almost to where it was over flowing .i gulped it down .Got back into the game wasn't feeling it all that much

Then when the game ended i grabbed another cup filled it up that's when i really started feeling it . i didn't know anything about buzzed or drunk i just knew i wasnt myself .one of the kids came over and asked if i wanted to play catch .i tryed for about 5mins then quit .the beer was hitting me hard. i struggled through that beer then decided to give it a bit of rest.i figured maybe it would go down just a bit if i just stopped drinking .then alot of the family members that came started to leave..and it was getting dark.after that the parents of the senior started going inside to leave us out in the back yard .their were tents set up .i cant remember putting one up or helping to put one up.once the sun went down the fire pit was lit .i was talking with this one dude he said he had to go pick up a female friend of his from work .then i remember talking to this pizza faced girl about taking a ride somewhere .

Cant remember all i know is we just wound up at a gas station and i was talking to her about chinese food .then we went back to the party someone broke out a case of beer can's i think maybe it was budweiser the kid that was talking to just before i left about him having to grab someone .came back by this time it was dark .his friend was some cute blond .i grabbed another beer and sat by the end of the picnic table .(i was never good with females ) so all this booze gave me liquid courage HA! i started talking to this girl then she pulled out a flask of bacardi and started drinking it strait up.i asked for a sip downed that sip.went back to my beer

Just as i was finishing my beer up (i was loaded at this point) all i can remember is i was just sitting one moment then woke up on my back with my leg's up against the bench of the picnic table the next.i got up :MISSING SCENES: PASSED OUT woke up lying away from the table on my back on the ground .More stumbling around walking talking loudly shouting .kept passing out more scenes missing .i literally woke up to be talking to this chick and she was sober .when i talked to her .i passed out again woke up and she was on the ground next to me drunk.i had no clue of what time it was or how much time had gone by .my friend had wobbled over to try and talk to this girl.i passed out again .This time i woke up along side my friend in this tent .his big fat arm was across my chest .i woke up stumbled out and grabbed some chips off another table and just stayed up the rest of the night ..the next day i went home and was soo out of it .it was a sunday .i still felt pretty hammered .then monday came and i felt the hunger overness and all up and down my legs arms head mosquito bites.i was itching my whole body that entire day at school...this started me on my drinking journey .i told a friend about it who was dropping me off at home ,every other day. he laughed..then i started going over his house after school..his parents were always never there right after school so i'd get to his spot and he'd always have some beers in his room ..i usually would smoke pot with him..Then just started getting into the drinking whenever id skip school i'd text him and we'd go to his house for a few brewski's ..the weekend's started becoming more interesting as i was getting invited to more parties..but i stayed away from beer .i was kind of a light weight anyway's .i just would need only a few to get me going with a buzz.(my whole entire life i maybe got drunk about 4 times . i hated being drunk )so i would get myself a nice buzz it became a talent of mine ..drink just enough to where i wouldn't be bent over a toilet yacking .i'd feel lousy in the morning but i could manage. i almost always drank during the weekend never did during the week really ..that was when id be liable to be caught .
(sphew hands getting cramped ill try my best to make the next post tighter stay tuned .........

Sudz No More

So, are you trying to quit? It is good that your are aware of the fact that drinking is a problem for you but what do you plan to do about it?

It certainly sounds like you need to stay away from it before your problems get worse.

ressurectJ

^ im 28 years old this happened years ago when i was 18...


Continued-Around the time i started drinking at first when i got hungover it didn't affect me i didn't get the urges or cravings for it .i never drank during the week simply because i would of never gotten away with coming home loaded during a weekday .so it was strictly weekends

i had this friend named marcus who's mom would work night shifts he'd come around usually friday night .asking if i wanted to go to party .He always seemed to be out partying somewhere or knew where parties were going off.
He made friends with this college kid and so every weekend we'd be drinking at this kids house all weekend .i started getting into booze and mixed drinks

i would literally leave friday night and not be back till sunday morn sometimes saturday night then go back sunday during the day for a few .skipping ahead to senior year .i didn't have a full period classes so i could leave early i'd go smoke pot with a friend or drink with that same friend until his folks came home back then it wouldn't take me much to catch a buzz..Like i said it became about out doing other people ..like most parties with kids it has to be done to excess skipping ahead once again to my college years ..i started dating i actually had cut back on my drinking quite a bit from high school.

i lost weight got into shape started taking care of myself and started getting alot of attention from the opposite sex.i still would drink and go to parties but it was more controlled ..this is when i started having a job and responsibilities like paying bills .i would drink but it was more of on a social level i had one g/f then i started working more full time then i met another girl

Her name was lauren she became a fulltime thing around that time i started reconnecting with old friends and we would go out and spend weekends just getting high Or getting drunk .every weekend was a party i even started taking up smoking ciggs (i dont know why).anyways after about a year i had quit school and started working towards this acting career of mine .while having the girlfriend which became a distraction me and her were on then off .my partying continued till i became 21 ..

One night i was driving home from a friends and i stopped by a store that sold liquor .i hadn't drank at my friends but decided .So i was sober i walked by the cooler and noticed these energy drink looking cans called "tilt " i bought 3 of them .i also noticed that they had alcohol in them.this was the first time i went home and drank by myself .i went home upstairs to my room and cut the lights and watched a movie while drinking these things.

i loved it because my bed was right there i didn't have to worry about crashing on floors or couches or my car .i was at home it gave me a comfy feeling also this was the first time i felt like i didn't need anyone else around me to be drinking ...(hand is cramping up again ill finish this up another day )