Okinawafog

I'm a 41 year old man in the Air Force. I've long wanted to change the way I live my life and recently took the first step. While visiting my military psychiatrist earlier this month (followup for smoking cessation), I revealed to him that I may have more immediate problems than just smoking. I've long known, though undiagnosed, that I had severe social anxiety. I've also been a heavy drinker my entire adult life (Seagram's is my medicine, exactly 16 oz per work night, and 24+ oz on weekends plus a few beers for the last 4 years...a little less than that going all the way back to 1989). I walked out of that meeting with my psychiatrist with a prescription for Zoloft and a very tenuous agreement that a substance abuse referral was in my future if I couldn't make some progress on my own (he's actually required to make the referral, but he's trying to give me some time to control my own destiny). That was 2 weeks ago, and I'm slowly resigning to the idea that I'm probably headed for some sort of clinical diagnosis/treatment as I just can't seem to control my urges.
I've desperately wanted to stop drinking for a couple years now. I have no serious health problems at the moment except for elevated BP, cholestorol, and heartburn. But I don't kid myself, I know it will catch up with me soon if I can't change my lifestyle.
My biggest hesitation is how this is going to affect my career in the AF. I'm guessing I will lose my secret clearance at least temporarily. Are there any military folks here who can help me understand what to expect? Any thoughts on what kind of treatment they'll decide for me? I want to take the next step. I don't really feel like there's any other option for me if I want to live beyond my 40s. Just very nervous right now.

Dee74

Hi okinowafog

I'm afraid I don't know the answers to your questions but I wanted to welcome you anyway

Others more knowlegeable than me will be along shortly no doubt

D

StPeteGrad

Well, first of all, welcome!

Other than the military employer, you just told the story of my life.

I'm 41, and started drinking the same time. I drank twelve beers a night, every night. In the end I started doing a shot occasionally as well. In the end I was drinking 10-12 beers and 1/2 a fifth of vodka each night.

I'm sorry, but this made me chuckle. Outside of the cholesterol, I had all of those symptoms too. The heartburn become so unpleasant and my tolerance so high that I ate very very little. I lost about 30 pounds in just a few months.

Here's where I hope we're not similar: In January I woke up with severe chest pain. I thought I was having a heart attack. It wasn't - it was a blood clot in my lung - just as deadly. It was directly caused by alcohol.

I still couldn't quit, and now I had vicodin as well. Luckily I was picked up for drunk driving and I finally got the hint. And I finally got help.

I took a leave from work and went to in-patient treatment since all other treatments failed. I've chosen AA to help me stay sober.

I'm 8 1/2 months sober today and got my 8 month coin tonight at the birthday meeting. I've gained the weight back, and my last CT Scan was clear. I eat well and have a blast with my kids. Life isn't perfect, but I'm not ashamed of myself anymore.


I wish you the very best. If you decide sobriety is what you really want it is very doable. People get sober every day.

Okinawafog

Dee, thanks for the warm welcome.
StPeteGrad, thank you for the comments. It means a lot to me. There are some chuckleworthy similarities as you point out. It gives me hope that I can turn this around and start living the life I want just as you have. I've managed to dodge the bullet regarding my health. But I also know it's just a matter of time if I don't change course. And even if I can fix this, what kind of damage have I inflicted on my body that's just waiting to pop up down the line? Worried.
I'm close to the point of surrendering to the process that I think will help me get better. At this point, I'm just trying to mitigate my concerns of the unknown that lies ahead.
Again, thanks. I hope to be fairly active here and will be looking for guidance and sharing my progress.

Stobert

I went through treatment while on active duty in the Navy eight years ago, kept my Top Secret clearance and retired three years ago. When my clearance came up for periodic review and renewal a few years after treatment, I told the investigator about my treatment, recovery and subsequent sobriety. They had no record of my treatment. What they were interested in: points for honesty, it's better to disclose these things on your own rather than have it come up during an interview with another person. Also, continuous sobriety since treatment is a must, relapse can be a deal breaker for clearances. The investigator came back once and asked a couple more questions, generally what has changed in my life since treatment. My clearance was was approved, good for another five years.