Hard night... So tired, but pleased I made it until this late, and with only soda
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Join Date: Jul 2008
Posts: 482
Hard night... So tired, but pleased I made it until this late, and with only soda
Oh what a night! (dare you to read that with out getting that song stuck in your head, you know the one 
)
As part of work I arrange functions and oversee events. Tonight was a big one for us, with drinks included in ticket price etc etc. I am 3 weeks sober, and was able to keep my alcoholism relatively private. Still, people know that when I am out I drink, and I drink a lot. So the bar tender would automatically grab my drink of choice when I went to the bar, but I said "No thanks Soda water tonight". It was no so much as super hard (it was a hard night) but super draining. I feel empty from all the effort it took to order soda water every damn time. I could have had a beer in my hand, opened, and ready to drink without even saying a word, just a nod of the head would have done it.
Nothing insightful or too interesting in this post, just wanted to share the internal screaming a little. My partner, who's a fantastic man, is doing his best to be supportive, but he doesn't understand alcoholism or what I'm going through really, so he didn't quite understand how hard tonight was for me. I've described it to him that alcoholism for me is like being hungry all the time. And there I was surrounded by "food", free "food", and I couldn't take a single bite. Even when people offered it to me... all it would take was one little word or a nod of the head and there it would be. But you guys understand, and that helps.
I'm going to hopefully recharge a little now, away from so much temptation, and get some sleep soon.
Oh, the one funny part of the night - because I'm NEVER at a social function without a drink, my work colleagues now think I'm pregnant :rotfxko Can't wait until they see me at the next function still not drinking... gotta love office rumours
) As part of work I arrange functions and oversee events. Tonight was a big one for us, with drinks included in ticket price etc etc. I am 3 weeks sober, and was able to keep my alcoholism relatively private. Still, people know that when I am out I drink, and I drink a lot. So the bar tender would automatically grab my drink of choice when I went to the bar, but I said "No thanks Soda water tonight". It was no so much as super hard (it was a hard night) but super draining. I feel empty from all the effort it took to order soda water every damn time. I could have had a beer in my hand, opened, and ready to drink without even saying a word, just a nod of the head would have done it.
Nothing insightful or too interesting in this post, just wanted to share the internal screaming a little. My partner, who's a fantastic man, is doing his best to be supportive, but he doesn't understand alcoholism or what I'm going through really, so he didn't quite understand how hard tonight was for me. I've described it to him that alcoholism for me is like being hungry all the time. And there I was surrounded by "food", free "food", and I couldn't take a single bite. Even when people offered it to me... all it would take was one little word or a nod of the head and there it would be. But you guys understand, and that helps.
I'm going to hopefully recharge a little now, away from so much temptation, and get some sleep soon.
Oh, the one funny part of the night - because I'm NEVER at a social function without a drink, my work colleagues now think I'm pregnant :rotfxko Can't wait until they see me at the next function still not drinking... gotta love office rumours
former walking pharmacy
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: Watertown, CT
Posts: 146
Congrats on 3 weeks sober! That's great! I wouldn't worry too much about what people 'might say' at this point, since you're still early in sobriety. I think we all tend to forget that most people don't even pay attention to what others do; they are mostly absorbed in themselves.
dude in recovery
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Gulf Coast, TX
Posts: 1,504
Woohoo! Three weeks for me too. In my case, it was the guys at the little corner stores that would have my beer already rang-up on the register before I made it to the cooler.
Keep it going.
Keep it going.
Guest
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: North Carolina
Posts: 184
Oh! The temptation is there even in me as I read this! Congrats on 3 weeks, that's awesome! Having to go to any type of social function with 3 weeks under your belt is not an easy move to make, but you did it!! And I bet you're happy for it!
Beer is my liquid devil of choice as well, and boy, is it everywhere in this city! (and every other city lol) - the town where I live has won "Beer city, USA" three years in a row
I try not to take note.
My partner does not understand alcoholism either. I'm glad this website exists so that we can share important things with people that DO get it.
Again, Congrats, we're all proud of you!!
Beer is my liquid devil of choice as well, and boy, is it everywhere in this city! (and every other city lol) - the town where I live has won "Beer city, USA" three years in a row
I try not to take note.My partner does not understand alcoholism either. I'm glad this website exists so that we can share important things with people that DO get it.
Again, Congrats, we're all proud of you!!
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