Thoughts on my situation?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 2
Thoughts on my situation?
Hello all!
So recently I've been tossing around the idea that I've gradually become a "high functioning alcoholic" I realize that term is something of an oxymoron as an alcoholic can only really be more or less functional... not fully functional.
I have never called in to work, been late, or otherwise had any negative effects on my work because of alcohol. In fact I frequently work 60+ hr weeks and feel I do a stellar job.
Outside of work I have a great relationship with my live-in girlfriend and am able to keep up with all of my other responsibilities.
I do think I drink too much though... I have an extremely stressful career that is difficult to leave at work and I am fairly certain I use alcohol as a means to "disconnect". I would estimate that roughly 5 days a week I drink 2-4 beers throughout the evening (typically craft style beer with slightly higher ABV) I'm not a big guy around 175lbs so this is a significant amount of alcohol for me, enough to get me mildly drunk.
This evening I've decided to avoid drinking and I don't feel like I'm intensely craving a drink but I'm honestly not sure if this is something that could be normal if I tried a little harder to make it normal or not.
I realized this morning that I am choosing a very poor way to deal with the stress that my job induces and my hardly noticeable, easily deniable declining work performance will slowly add up over time and create more stress and more of a want to drink daily. I'm only 24 and have grown so quickly into my current job role I am really not equipped to deal with the type of stress I am exposed to right now.
I think that simply setting goals for myself for the week to not exceed and finding better ways to mitigate my stress levels may be enough to head this off but I really would appreciate some input from others that have been down this road...
So recently I've been tossing around the idea that I've gradually become a "high functioning alcoholic" I realize that term is something of an oxymoron as an alcoholic can only really be more or less functional... not fully functional.
I have never called in to work, been late, or otherwise had any negative effects on my work because of alcohol. In fact I frequently work 60+ hr weeks and feel I do a stellar job.
Outside of work I have a great relationship with my live-in girlfriend and am able to keep up with all of my other responsibilities.
I do think I drink too much though... I have an extremely stressful career that is difficult to leave at work and I am fairly certain I use alcohol as a means to "disconnect". I would estimate that roughly 5 days a week I drink 2-4 beers throughout the evening (typically craft style beer with slightly higher ABV) I'm not a big guy around 175lbs so this is a significant amount of alcohol for me, enough to get me mildly drunk.
This evening I've decided to avoid drinking and I don't feel like I'm intensely craving a drink but I'm honestly not sure if this is something that could be normal if I tried a little harder to make it normal or not.
I realized this morning that I am choosing a very poor way to deal with the stress that my job induces and my hardly noticeable, easily deniable declining work performance will slowly add up over time and create more stress and more of a want to drink daily. I'm only 24 and have grown so quickly into my current job role I am really not equipped to deal with the type of stress I am exposed to right now.
I think that simply setting goals for myself for the week to not exceed and finding better ways to mitigate my stress levels may be enough to head this off but I really would appreciate some input from others that have been down this road...
Member
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 14
hi Luna, you are exactly where I was about 5 or 6 years ago but you're smart to identify a possible problem early on (I just joined this forum today as well, you can check out my situation by clicking on my user name and going to my post). Booze can quickly become a crutch and a way to self-medicate...I think it's a good idea to take a break from it before things progess.
Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Serene In Dixie
Posts: 36,740
Luna...Welcome.....
....Hi again dwightwin...
I really think you are being wise to examine your drinking now. Good for you..
You might find this link interesting.....
http://chemcases.com/alcohol/alc-07.htm
According to the CDC....all alcohol causes damages to your brain and body.
This is true for all drinkers...not only alcoholics.
Wishing you all the best for a healthy productive sober future..
....Hi again dwightwin...I really think you are being wise to examine your drinking now. Good for you..
You might find this link interesting.....
http://chemcases.com/alcohol/alc-07.htm
According to the CDC....all alcohol causes damages to your brain and body.
This is true for all drinkers...not only alcoholics.
Wishing you all the best for a healthy productive sober future..
Member
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: New York City
Posts: 221
Frankly I used to identify as a "functioning alcoholic" but after much reading I now prefer the more clinical term, "Middle Stage Alcoholic."
That you are here wondering at all is enough to check-mark another item on the famous "Am I an Alcoholic" test many of us took at some point.
The catch is, the changes that are occurring in your body, alcohol resistance, tolerance, etc. will keep going. The only way to arrest the advancement of alcoholism is to abstain from alcohol. It's my hope you will do this sooner than later, since more "proof" will be hard won.
Welcome to SR and all the best!
That you are here wondering at all is enough to check-mark another item on the famous "Am I an Alcoholic" test many of us took at some point.
The catch is, the changes that are occurring in your body, alcohol resistance, tolerance, etc. will keep going. The only way to arrest the advancement of alcoholism is to abstain from alcohol. It's my hope you will do this sooner than later, since more "proof" will be hard won.
Welcome to SR and all the best!
Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Posts: 873
At 24 I was the same way in many respects. Grew fast in my company, lots of work, lots of stress, increasing amounts of drinking.
It went on for years until it really started to snowball in my mid-late 30's. So I'm glad you're aware of the potential problem now.
One thing I would tell you is that after quitting I realized that a lot of the stress of work was not alleviated by alcohol. Instead it was complicated by the alcohol. I'm way less stressed out now.
It's a bit like...let's say you have to make a phone call you think will be unpleasant. If you wait for days to make the call, it's just going to bother you for days. Might as well make it and get it over with.
Same principle applies when you use alcohol to block out your stress. The stress is going to be there tomorrow. Why not think it through with a clear head right now?
Oh and welcome.
It went on for years until it really started to snowball in my mid-late 30's. So I'm glad you're aware of the potential problem now.
One thing I would tell you is that after quitting I realized that a lot of the stress of work was not alleviated by alcohol. Instead it was complicated by the alcohol. I'm way less stressed out now.
It's a bit like...let's say you have to make a phone call you think will be unpleasant. If you wait for days to make the call, it's just going to bother you for days. Might as well make it and get it over with.
Same principle applies when you use alcohol to block out your stress. The stress is going to be there tomorrow. Why not think it through with a clear head right now?
Oh and welcome.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: Leominster, Ma
Posts: 119
Dear Luna,
If you are thinking you are drinking too much you may have a problem but only you can answer that question. You are reaching out here in an alcoholsim forum and definitely asking the right people. before I actually put down the drink I went thru all these thoughts about ways I could cut back, maybe if I don't go out so much, maybe if i don't drink at home, maybe if I only drink beer or wine etc. etc. I thought about my drinking ALOT it was something I wanted to change in my life...you say you haven't had any trouble or problems but beleive me I know a lot of "normal" drinkers and they don't ever think too much about why, when or where they are drinking because they don't need to drink. I have friends that have one and then switch to soda, I have friends that have a glass or two of wine with dinner on friday nights, etc. I hope you get my drift.
it's great you are here and asking and looking for some answers, I'll bet the folks here offer tons of suggestions but please remember your experience is so different then everyone elses, we are different but our outcome was the same, we could not drink in safety and it made our lives unmanageable.
They have those pamplets at meetings, the famous 20 questions, probably posted somewhere here in the forum as well. answer those questions to yourself and HONESTLY answer them. that made me head on out the door to an AA meeting as I said YES to 18 of them !!!
I'm many years sober now, I didn't start out having a problem with booze but I ended up having a prblem with it. please stay close to us here...maybe we can be of some support.
all the best, m
If you are thinking you are drinking too much you may have a problem but only you can answer that question. You are reaching out here in an alcoholsim forum and definitely asking the right people. before I actually put down the drink I went thru all these thoughts about ways I could cut back, maybe if I don't go out so much, maybe if i don't drink at home, maybe if I only drink beer or wine etc. etc. I thought about my drinking ALOT it was something I wanted to change in my life...you say you haven't had any trouble or problems but beleive me I know a lot of "normal" drinkers and they don't ever think too much about why, when or where they are drinking because they don't need to drink. I have friends that have one and then switch to soda, I have friends that have a glass or two of wine with dinner on friday nights, etc. I hope you get my drift.
it's great you are here and asking and looking for some answers, I'll bet the folks here offer tons of suggestions but please remember your experience is so different then everyone elses, we are different but our outcome was the same, we could not drink in safety and it made our lives unmanageable.
They have those pamplets at meetings, the famous 20 questions, probably posted somewhere here in the forum as well. answer those questions to yourself and HONESTLY answer them. that made me head on out the door to an AA meeting as I said YES to 18 of them !!!
I'm many years sober now, I didn't start out having a problem with booze but I ended up having a prblem with it. please stay close to us here...maybe we can be of some support.
all the best, m
Member
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: in this vessel
Posts: 304
When I came here asking the same questions feeling similar about being "functional". Some advice or rather pieces of truth that I've applied to my life are that feeling functional is a form of denial and there is no social or sometimes type of drinking; you either do or you don't. And that sobriety is a gift.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 2
Originally Posted by missmargo916 
Luna - Welcome and best of luck to you! I hope that you find the answers you are seeking in terms of your alcohol consumption and how it affects your life. As everyone stated before, only you know if you have a problem. Other people may identify it, but you are the one that will need to do an honest assessment.
I know this is a little off-topic, but why do you continue down this career path? If it is truly as toxic as you are stating, why not search out something new? If you are truly an alcoholic, changing jobs will not fix the alcohol problem. You will continue to use it as a way to "feel better". If it is just a toxic work environment spilling into other aspects of your life, then maybe a change would benefit. I don't know... that's just my quick take on the situation. But my argument with anyone in a job they are unhappy with is always to change it. We spend 75% of our waking hours at work. Our coworkers tend to be more of a family than our actual families. So why spend all that time doing something that makes you physically ill and unhappy? I always tell myself that I deserve to enjoy life. I will do everything in my power to make sure I make the best of every moment God has given me grace to exist.
I know this is a little off-topic, but why do you continue down this career path? If it is truly as toxic as you are stating, why not search out something new? If you are truly an alcoholic, changing jobs will not fix the alcohol problem. You will continue to use it as a way to "feel better". If it is just a toxic work environment spilling into other aspects of your life, then maybe a change would benefit. I don't know... that's just my quick take on the situation. But my argument with anyone in a job they are unhappy with is always to change it. We spend 75% of our waking hours at work. Our coworkers tend to be more of a family than our actual families. So why spend all that time doing something that makes you physically ill and unhappy? I always tell myself that I deserve to enjoy life. I will do everything in my power to make sure I make the best of every moment God has given me grace to exist.
My company is going through a ridiculous growth spurt and right now I'm one of the folks that has to pick up the slack. I've actually already made myself a promise that if I don't enjoy my job again by August 1 of next year I will be resigning.
I haven't had a drop since my post the other day and I feel mostly fine about it. As part of my plan to become healthier I've created a chart to track whether I've worked out or run that day and whether I've had anything to drink. I've posted it on my fridge so as long as I can be honest in my record keeping I'll have some level of accountability to my girlfriend as right now we mostly work opposite shifts and I doubt she knows how much I really drink.
Thank you all for your feedback.
12-Step Recovered Alkie
Join Date: May 2010
Location: West Bloomfield, MI
Posts: 5,797
cool.
Hopefully the changes you're making will do the trick. One way to find out, right?
Really though, I hope it works for you.
If it doesn't seem to be working though, feel free to pop into the 12 Step section and ask us what we did when none of our plans to maintain sobriety worked.
Hopefully the changes you're making will do the trick. One way to find out, right?
Really though, I hope it works for you.If it doesn't seem to be working though, feel free to pop into the 12 Step section and ask us what we did when none of our plans to maintain sobriety worked.
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