detroiter

I'm finally sober, and I'm lovin' it, except for my excessive worrying and anxiety. I had around 6 years of REALLY heavy drinking of liquor, and probably around 1-2 years of social drinking before that. But now that I'm sober I'm always worried about if I've done permanent damage, and it literally keeps me up all night, every night, googling about cirrhosis etc. Towards the end of my drinking career, I had really high AST/ALT enzymes, then I got an ultrasound done a few weeks later and my liver was supposedly fine. Within a few months the enzymes were normal too, so stupidly I drank for another year, and that whole year was a constant battle to quit and an emotional roller coaster- until I finally got sober. I moved to start a new life and switched doctors after that so I never got any further blood tests or ultrasounds. I think this crazy worrying is all happening because I finally became health conscious and truly learned the dangers of consuming alcohol and junk food. I keep reading all this scary stuff about how normal results on blood tests can't be taken seriously, and that ultrasounds can miss early stage fibrosis/permanent damage, and permanent liver damage may not present any sympotoms etc. etc. The only symptoms I've had is my face/chest itching but I'm pretty sure that's just anxiety from all this worrying. Literally everyday I wake up and immediately think about my liver and check to see if it hurts, then I check my eyes for jaundice and examine all my skin and look for every symptom of liver disease I've heard of. It's driving me nuts, and I do this several times a day. Have any of you drank for a period this long/longer and been fine with health? Or vice-versa, drank for a shorter period and had permanent damage? Any input would really help, and don't worry, alcohol is completely out of the picture for me. I set an appointment with my doctor next month because I finally decided I should tell him about all this, even though I have no symptoms. Many people tell me that alcoholics have drank far more than me (although they wouldn't know because most of my drinking was hidden) and that they have drank for much longer periods and been fine. It's just impossible for me to find people that would actually tell me how much they drank and for how long, and what happened. I haven't gone to AA ever since I've done a fantastic job staying sober on my own, so the recovering alcoholics here are the only people that can help a recovering alcoholic like myself. I hate this worrying, it's literally ruining my life.

checkmate1

yeah towards the end of my drinking career I was worried about cirrhosis and worried I was getting jaundice was checking my eyes. I drank heavily for 12 years my liver function test was really bad the ast and alt were in the late 100s I think one of them was above 200. I had another test recently 3 months sober results were back to normal. Just get it checked out the worry and anxiety can be over and done with in a few days.

Boleo

Sounds like you need to start trusting Doctors again.

detroiter

Thanks guys, I definitely do need to start trusting doctors again. I wish I hadn't read all that I read about misdiagnosis.

CarolD

I was already in 3rd year of sobriety before I came on line to discover Dr. Google...

My alcoholism affected my brain...everything else tested ok. I had no out ward signs of damage.
My doctor diagnosed me with situational depression...told me to abstain and connect to AA.

I did both and it's been an awesome lifestyle.

Hope all works out to your benefit....

DayTrader

I try to focus on the stuff I DO have some power over. Not to say I don't have any say in my health.....but what I CAN control is make sure I'm doing everything I can to stay on the path of sobriety.

I've found that there's a LOT I do have some power over that'll keep me MORE than busy. If I stick with working on that stuff, the other things tend to work themselves out.

sugarbear1

If alcohol were my only problem, I wouldn't need AA. My anxiety disappeared after working steps 4-9 with an AA spiritual advisor who was taken through the steps by her sponsor...good luck doing it on your own!

abc

detroiter, I don't blame you for not trusting doctors. I don't trust them either. I think they are con-artists. I haven't been to a doctor in ages. I detox at home. I have never had my liver enzymes checked. I once called a clinic here and asked what it costs for a physical exam with blood test and they said $800. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.

switchboard

Hi... I've been sober over a year now.... I drank about a quart of hard liquor (vodka in the end) per day, and sometimes 1.5 quarts (a fifth and a half), 24 hours a day, as long as I was awake .. otherwise I'd shake. The heaviest of my drinking was in the last two years of my drinking career, but I have been drinking daily for several years. Not sure how many. But lots... between 5 and 10. And before that, most evenings. Before that, every other evening. And before that, heavy on the weekends. You know how it goes. I probably have 30 years of drinking behind me, easily.

I ended up in the hospital, yellow as a neon sign.. skin, eyes, everything. Anyway, I only have a few posts in my history (I don't talk much - lol), if you want to read... I think my first post is the one where I talk about my jaundice ... (I tried to post a link for you, but the message said I had to have 15 posts to be able to do so .. lol.)

I will add that the specialist I saw after getting out of the hospital told me that he didn't believe I had cirrhosis (based on ultrasound, CT scan, bloodwork, etc.... I didn't have a biopsy though) .. and that I could expect to live a normal life, as long as I keep my body healthy.

Try not to worry. You're doing great. Also, if anyone tells you that "if you're yellow, it's too late", they're wrong. The thing you do need to keep in mind is "Listen to Your Body" .. it tells you things. Don't ignore them.

detroiter

Thanks switchboard, that was exactly what I was looking for. Congrats on your sobriety

TwelveSteps

I drank heavily for 10 years, about 2 bottles of wine a night by myself for the last few years for maintenance plus more if I was going out with friends (3-4 times a week) or just bingeing by myself, and my liver is fine -- of course, every individual is different, and doctors aren't out to hurt you or lie to you. Find one you trust!

GG