Life's Done a 180
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 452
Life's Done a 180
Well today marks 46 days sober and I can honestly look myself in the mirror and state that my life has done a complete 180 since quitting drinking. This last weekend I ran a trail half-marathon. The scenery was beautiful and it gave me some time to reflect. I thought that while most people running the race were out training seven or eight weeks ago, I was waking up hung over as hell and the wishing I could get at it.
I made a decision to really own up to my problems and get clean, and I did. I had to do this for myself and by myself. I'm not into meetings and that sort of thing. I was honest about my problems and, upon deep reflection, I made the realization that I had lost my zest for life. I realized that I was no longer setting personal goals (outside of work) and that I was just living the "American Dream."
I have started to set goals for myself and now I have started to achieve them. I know that alcohol does not have a place in my life anymore, it's as easy as that. I have been to several functions with an open bar since my decision to get clean. People say, do you want a drink, and I just tell them no. If they ask qhy, I tell them I am going on a run the next day and it will make me feel like crap, which is true.
Alcohol was filling a void for me. When you lose the abilty to dream and goal-set, you become a pessimist and a cynic. I believe this happens to most people once out of college for a few years and once they get started in their career. Most take the easy road, they take the path of least resistance. Living this "numb existence" - not pushing beyond my comfort zone is just not for me and, as such, I medicated that feeling out of my life with alcohol.
That is my rant for the day . . .
I made a decision to really own up to my problems and get clean, and I did. I had to do this for myself and by myself. I'm not into meetings and that sort of thing. I was honest about my problems and, upon deep reflection, I made the realization that I had lost my zest for life. I realized that I was no longer setting personal goals (outside of work) and that I was just living the "American Dream."
I have started to set goals for myself and now I have started to achieve them. I know that alcohol does not have a place in my life anymore, it's as easy as that. I have been to several functions with an open bar since my decision to get clean. People say, do you want a drink, and I just tell them no. If they ask qhy, I tell them I am going on a run the next day and it will make me feel like crap, which is true.
Alcohol was filling a void for me. When you lose the abilty to dream and goal-set, you become a pessimist and a cynic. I believe this happens to most people once out of college for a few years and once they get started in their career. Most take the easy road, they take the path of least resistance. Living this "numb existence" - not pushing beyond my comfort zone is just not for me and, as such, I medicated that feeling out of my life with alcohol.
That is my rant for the day . . .
Member
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Here, Now
Posts: 4,268
Congrads and keep positive. alcoholics tend to create their own realities and over time can downplay or forget the downside of drinking. Just hold onto the blessings of sobriety and keep on keeping on.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Nebraska
Posts: 423
I kind of thought that the first 3-4 month timeframe was like a huge crossroads for me. If I could make it that long I felt I had a good chance at staying sober.
But I was not as strong as you because try as I might, I could not make it that far on my own.
Good luck, really watch for triggers, and don't hesitate to reach out if you need help.
Dave
ps my workouts were a key for me too!
But I was not as strong as you because try as I might, I could not make it that far on my own.
Good luck, really watch for triggers, and don't hesitate to reach out if you need help.
Dave
ps my workouts were a key for me too!
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