Terminally Unique

Well, I got yet another call today from an old AA friend, who now lives in another state. It went like this: "Hey, I heard from so-and-so at your old group that you haven't been going to meetings for over four months? Are you back to drinking?"

I said "No" but they didn't believe me. That did it for me, people out of state talking about me, so I fly down to a meeting I used to go to at 75 MPH, thinking "I'll show them !!!!!" I walk into the room, and guess what? I realize that I locked my keys in my car!!! I think "S*** !!!! - This isn't going as planned !!! - so much for being a smart a**."

Long story short, they call on me to "share" first, and I had to tell the group that I locked myself out of my car. Nobody flinched.

Eventually, at the end of the meeting, I reluctantly ask if someone can drive me home - it was about to start raining. One guy who is at that group all the time says "Oh, don't worry, I can get you in your car faster than you can get in with the key. I was just waiting for you to ask."

It took him about 20 seconds to break into the car...

bellakeller

I no longer call on AAA for car issues....I use AA now....

Love that story!

Squizz

Funny story, but what I can't understand: Why did you feel such a desire to prove to them that you didn't drink? You know you didn't drink, isn't that good enough?

"They" can buzz off as far as I'm concerned!

billsaintjames

I don't think it's right for someone to call you and accuse you of drinking. This is one of the reasons I haven't gone to AA/NA.

I personally know only one person who has gone to AA. The AA guys endlessly hounded him about choosing to not do activities outside of AA with them. It bugged my friend so much eventually that he stopped attending meetings.

I would like to go to an NA meeting. I think it's nice that the people there care about each other. But it seems to me that they take it a bit far sometimes.

CarolD

I tooo depend on my fellow AA members for many things....
as I can no longer see to drive....
they take me to meetings and all sorts of other places I need to be.

i'm tickled you did go..and shared your ES&H...someone there may have needed you...

Tip..when I had cars...I kept a spare key in my billfold

Terminally Unique

I don't know, really. There's some good people in there, and they are genuinely concerned. A lot of people do leave and get hammered, after all. Others, though, I get the impression that they just want to wag their finger, and I suppose I wanted to wag back.

It seems fate had another plan in mind...

laurie6781

Yep, good old AA, roflmao

I keep a 'slim jim' in my vehicle, given to me byone of my Sheriff Deputy friends for just such occasions, lol and yes it has been used ocer the years.

I think your 'old' AA friend was really concerned and instead of 'gossiping' came straight to the source, you.

How you reacted is on you, lol Maybe, some more work on you is needed, lol

Glad you went to the meeting.

Love and hugs,

Squizz

Exactly.

These people just wanted to say, "We told ya' so." and from what I gather you wanted desperately to say, "You're not telling me ANYTHING" (So much so, that you drove, what 75miles?)

In the greater scheme of things, doesn't this all seem immature? I've seen it so many times at meetings, and it just seems like such a waste of time for me.

If someone says they aren't drinking, then that should be good enough. Case closed.

Squizz

Oh wait........you drove 75mph to another state, just to prove someone wrong.

Sounds like the type of thing I would do to get a drink.

Not trying to harp on you. Just seems like you could have done a lot better stuff with your time, that didn't involve potentially getting a speeding ticket.

But hey, what do I know? To each their own.

BackToSquareOne

Not everyone is equally socially adroit. The guy was probally well intentioned so I would look at it in that regard.

billsaintjames

Yea, good point.

Latte

We moved two years ago from Alaska. I still get calls sometimes. People from my old 'hood are coming down and want up to date meeting schedules (they aren't on the AA site-you kind of have to dig for em). Of course they ask a million other questions too but still funny and encouraging. Heck, the guy who headed up the mental health program contacted me by email last year. He wanted some information about this site. I love AA, the nosy people, the concerned people, and the love and concern everyone has.

Terminally Unique

True. As they say, though, "El hombre pone y Dios dispone."

I will say this for AA members - they will usually provide services to those in need for free, or at least for a significantly reduced price.

TheJungianThing

Cool story. I feel compelled to chime in about the fellowship. There's a circle, a network if you will, of close knit brothers with whom I maintain contact. They will probably call out of concern. Members of our circle have gone out in the past and the conversation about them has been discrete and based in concern. Phone calls made to extend a hand - if refused - no further contact is made. It is tantamount to trying 12th Step someone in a bar while they're drinking. It doesn't work.

When the person turns HIS back on us, we naturally go about our own business. Not in an uncaring way but in an understanding way. Understanding, alcoholism and understanding our own inability to "rescue" someone from their decision.

I've heard stories of the almost stalkerlike approach of members of the fellowship. I have not been party to it nor a witness to it in my area. It is not my experience. Further I don't believe it is suggested anywhere in the text.

anew

This is the kind of behavior that turned me off to AA for awhile. I live in a very small town with only 3 meetings per week and the same people attend each of those meetings. I haven't attended those meetings in about a year. I was blessed enough to meet a woman from out of town who became my sponsor and I now attend the same meetings she does and it works out great.

Unfortunately some of the local group ladies still call, text, and track me down in public to remind me that I am doomed to fail and they are certain that I have returned to drinking. I have not, but there is no convincing them so I just go on.

What is unfortunate is that newcomers who attend the local meetings get a poor representation of what AA really is.