lillyknitting

Anyone want to share their thoughts with me on this one? Was out to dinner last night with friends, very good friends who are actually heavy drinkers, and chatting away animatedly about this and that when suddenly out of nowhere came the thought ......yes, maybe,......I could arrange with this friend to have a drink.....oh my God. When will this thinking ever leave me. Have been doing really well, but I guess with the Easter weekend coming up and half the population are either sitting on a motorway or....getting drunk out of their heads!!! Who knows where it comes from but today I am grateful that I will not be having a drink. Have now arranged to go to a meeting this evening with an AA friend and will keep myself buzy, any thoughts please!!!

justjo

I think you are doing some great thinking on this yourself Lilly. Have a good meeting and youre doing well.
JJ

doggonecarl

I don't know when they go away. For over thirty years I drank whenever the thought entered my head to drink. So I don't expect the thinking about drinking to end overnight. I just have to understand that these thoughts will occur and its up to me recognize the passing nature of them...and ignore them. Good luck and have a happy, sober Easter.

OklaBH

Ive drank 4 times since January 3rd. Everytime I did it was a thought just like the one you had. "Maybe..just maybe I can control it this time" Its like we have 2 people battling it out inside of us. The sober person and the drunk. I thought the drunk inside of me wouldve drowned years ago but shes always there waiting for the sober one to give in. Sick sick thinking!

Soberween

Well to start....half the population are not out getting drunk. It just feels like that way when you first give up drinking.

jenn8671

I have had those same thoughts so many times - and unfortunately, too many times, I gave in and drank. My therapist tells me its simply my "alcoholic brain" and that with time and hard work, those thoughts will be far and few between. Congratulations on making the right choice for you. Doesn't it feel great?

azureseas

Yup I've had those thoughts 'pop' into my head. I don't even want to drink
I guess those pathways in our gray matter are well worn
I'm working on creating a more scenic route nowadays

jamdls

I had 1 of those thoughts pop in my head a couple of months ago and I have been sober since 9/07. I'm not sure those thoughts will ever completely go away but I've only had them 2 or 3 times in the last 3+ years. I was a drinker for over 30 yrs which is more than half of my life so I suspect it may take at least that many years of not drinking before those thoughts disappear completely and thats ok because I have the "tools" to deal with those thoughts.

Latte

I always considered stinkin' thinkin' to be the thoughts that led up to the drink and how I was feeling about myself. Mostly thoughts about how I wasn't worthy of good things, how I was too fat, too whatever.

One of the best reasons to have positive self affirmation stuff all over the house.

rumnut

I can relate. Been sober (this time) 1 month and a day. In the past week I considered drinking 3 or 4 times. I could have acted on those thoughts but didn't.
The insanity is simple. I start feeling good and the "notion" comes into my brain. I have no willpower on my own. I love the effects of being drunk. Nothing can replace the 2 (or maybe 3) hours of bliss.
When this "notion" enters my brain, I rarely think about what happens after "bliss time". My behavior becomes erratic, I black out, I say and do regretable things. I become violent. Then there's the next morning...the fear of what I said and did, the craving for more liquor, the dry heaves, the beer *****, my stomach churning, body aching, the resolve to quit again, the guilt. Then comes the planning for the day.....how can I get more liquor? If I work, I need to get some rum and pour it into a empty coke bottle for the ride home. Depending on who I work for, I can start hitting the bottle while I'm working. Just try to keep it together until I get home. Don't need another DWI. That would be a felony. Try not to get too drunk before my wife gets home or she'll be angry. This is insane.
What's been working so far is trying to put God in my mind first thing when I wake up. If I don't, my mind begins the daily routine of resentment, fear, guilt and selfishness. I read the big book and 24 hrs a day. I thank God for my sobriety. I pray for those I know in need. When negative thoughts enter me, I try to recognize them and immediately ask God to remove them. If I don't do this, I could spend the whole day dwelling on the past, fearing the future, and not paying any attention to the present.
I am grateful for this site. I just joined this morning. Thanks to all of you.

Pete55

I heard a speaker today with 20+ years sobriety.
To cut a long story short; if we are talking about the real alcoholic, it then seems the thougt of a drink will always be around lurking.
If we are real alcoholics, why would we want to stop drinking?
It's what happens when we drink, the suffering.
So ok, we are powerless to stop the thought of a drink, and it can become a very powerfull "graphical and entertaining" thought process to try and make us believe, "we could have a drink today". What I find the key to be is, I may get those thoughts, but the obsession over those thoughts has been removed. Or, how I respond.
If I know of surrender to alcohol, then I stand a lesser chance of obsessing that "drink thought".
It's like Mike Tyson ( alcohol ) saying, "come on in the ring". And me ( alcoholic ) saying, "I've surrendered long time ago" and walk away unharmed once again.

But if let's say Mike Tyson ( alcohol ) say's, "come on in the ring" and I obsess on taking it on, ( drink alcohol ), then as a real alcoholic, I'm history.

How many "nose bleeds" does it take for one to "get it", if they are real alcoholic one drink can set off a spree, the physical craving kicks in, then the "jekyl and hyde" thing happens, and wooooosh, going going gone!

It's not rocket science.

artsoul

Hang in there....... It sure would be nice if we didn't get those thoughts anymore, wouldn't it? I'm just glad to know I'm not the only one who has them.

When you see people out drinking this weekend, remember that a lot of them are going to be miserable the next day and filled with regret.

DayTrader

My experience is that the thought of having a drink, once and a while, may just not go away permanently. It used to really bother me - mostly because I was managing my own sobriety and expecting perfection. To me, at the time, it seemed that ANY thought of a drink was an indication that I wasn't on the right path.

Over time, is finally sunk in that I need to go a tough easier on myself - to expect perfection was part of my old Belief System - a system that I tried my best to manage and manifest yet never could bring about. Frustration ensued and that usually led to more "bad thoughts." The proverbial snowball rolling down hill gathering size and speed, so to speak.

If you're a real alcoholic, odds are, the brief thought of having a drink......even just once and a great while......may be with you for quite a while. ACTING upon that thought though, the playing out how you'll get it, how it'll taste, how it'll make you feel, and so forth......that stuff should dissapate in time IF you're working on your complete recovery (in all the areas of your life that need recovering ) rather than working on just "not drinking."

FWIW, it occurred to me the other day at about 7AM while I was getting dressed that a big glass of Captain's and Coke would sure taste good later on today... that thought immediately brought a smile to my face as I recognized that it was just that old way of thinking still trying to rear it's insane head again..... It's almost cute now....in a pitiful way. lol.

recoverywfaith

It will lessen in time. From time to time I still have thoughts of drinking and just say yep damn alkie and work step 1 and to never forget what it was like (stop the thought process...realize it...and ask God to remove it). Good job on your awareness in your recovery!!

MrDavid

Amen...

TwelveSteps

I started drinking primarily to deal with insomnia. I have been sober for more than a year and whenever I can't sleep, the first thing that pops into my head is ALWAYS, if I just had a couple glasses of wine I could sleep. So frustrating!

But the good news is that it's totally normal, and you will get used to it.

GG

Ozgirl

Don't be too hard on yourself, you are doing great. A big thing I am learning is that just because I think of drinking or feel like drinking it does not mean I have to ACT on it.