chrissp

After 28 days. A single day of stupidity that I am still hurting from on Tuesday. I'm so ashamed of myself.

MsCooterBrown

Hang in there...At 28 days it is a thinking game..alcohol has left your system but the alcoholic voice still comes across. I had to stay away from drinking people and establishments. I go when there is something I feel I must attend but usually it revolves around dinner and I have an early out excuse ready when I need it. Maybe that will work for you as well. It helps to line yourself up with activities to keep you occupied and away from thinking about drinking.

ZZworldontheweb

Any clue as to what led to it? Did you have some triggers or did you find yourself wanting to feel different for some reason?

dairo

*bitch slaps Chrissp, and tells him to get back on that damn wagon and stay on it!!*


In all seriousness, don't dwell on it too much, just take it a day at a time! Life isn't over cause you had a lapse (and to people who always say relapse, no, it is a lapse, a relapse is for people who have made it at least a year, fyi.)

Creekryder

A lesson to be heeded by us all. Recovery is a fragile state, able to be compromised in a moment. A lesson to be constantly vigilant to our individual triggers and do what needs to be done to disarm them. A relapse does not mean failure, it means more work is to be done.

CarolD

I did start over..many times ..before I actually quit.
I hope you are planning a fresh sart...

AcceptingChange

Try not to think "I failed". Think instead "I can another 28+ days". You made 28 days, that's awesome. If you do 28 day stretches, you'll soon find that it's easier each time.
Sunday i had a family party, that used to be a lot of drinking. It was a struggle for the first year of me not drinking during them. Now, i barely notice it.

UniqueNewYork

Why do we fall down Master Bruce ?

TwelveSteps

I relapsed many times. It took me over a year to get to 90 days. The important thing for me was really analyzing (with the help of my sponsor and therapist) what led up to each relapse, and what I needed to do differently going forward to ensure a different outcome. In hindsight, the signs of an impending relapse always seemed pretty obvious and I learned to spot them ahead of time and change my course -- even though I relapsed more than once, I never did it twice for the same reason, so I guess that's something!

Also, I don't know if this matters to you, but I found it helpful to stop counting days (even though I am a big AA person and that's part of the usual routine). Whenever I would reach a milestone I'd feel like I had run a marathon or something and now I needed a "break." Instead, I just greet every day as a new day and focus on the question, "what am I going to do to nurture my sobriety today?"

Welcome back.

GG

GodsHolyWill

Hi! Please don't feel ashamed at yourself! You're just human! In fact, give yourself credit for dusting yourself off and trying again!

ChikkaB

No reason for shame. Pick yourself up, dust yourself off, put one foot in front of the other.

Failure is not falling down, but refusing to get up. You can do this.

mtnmagic

Hope you start feeling better real soon. I agree with the others
guilt and shame will just keep you down and lead you back out there
again. I wish you well.

chrissp

Thanks guys. I love this place. Today is day number 3 of round 2. Starting to feel a little better.

Linz

This place is awesome, isn't it Chrissp? People are so helpful here and very supportive, I'm so happy that I found this site.
It's all uphill from here! (An extreme climb!)

MrDavid

Welcome back chrissp...

If at first you don't succeed,
Try, try again. - Thomas H. Palmer

Words of wisdom...to help calm your demeanor.




~God Bless~

Zebra1275

Well, it sounds to me like you've been sober 28 of 29 days, which is 97% of the time. If you were a daily drinker before, than you've made a great improvement.

Now stop beating yourself up and start another string of sober days.