LeeK

I don't know if I'm an alcoholic, or if I'm pretty 'normal' for my age. I've read the characteristics of someone dependent on alcohol, and quite a few seem to fit. But it's pretty common for a 19 guy to get wasted on a somewhat regular basis, so if I say anything about being an alcoholic, everyone says "Oh, you're just young, and having a little too much fun. Everyone does it. You're no different." But the thing is, it's becoming different. I seriously think it's becoming a problem. I've read the signs, shakes in the morning, being unable to stop at one or two, drinking every day, drinking alone, all that, and so many fit.

Maybe I'm in denial, or I'm just being paranoid, I don't know. How likely is it that someone who can't even legally drink be dependent on alcohol? I've been getting drunk with friends or at parties since I was 9 (young I know), I've had a fake ID since I was 17 to buy booze for parties or whatever, but it seems like in the past year it's escalated. Not just parties, but every night, rarely less than 4 or 5 beers. Waking up sick and barely dragging myself to work.

Does this sound like an average 19 year old, or the makings of a problem? I want to stop myself if I'm headed down the wrong road.

Wilde10

Many will tell you here that only you can know if you have a problem. You have been drinking for 10 years in a body that was even less prepared than the average to deal with alcohol, although I suspect many of us started to flirt with alcohol quite young. I remember my first time drunk when I was 16. And then getting drunk from time to time. Alcohol became frequent much later, but from the begining I can see (now, not then) that my drinking was excessive and i always drank to get drunk. And I did enjoy this feeling differently than others seem to.

Young people are not meant to be alcoholics, children are not meant to be alcoholic, obviously mothers and fathers are not meant to be alcoholic because they have the destiny of other human beings in their hands, successful professionals are not meant to be alcoholics, surgeons are not meant to be alcoholics, policemen, etc. But I promise you being an alcoholic is different from being a middle age homeless man. Look at yourself and what you are doing. Would you think you have a problem with booze if you were 45?

LeeK

You have a very good point. And yes, I would. I've thought to myself, if I don't get this under control, am I going to be an alcoholic when I'm 25, 35, 45? And you're right, it's the same thing, just different age. But so many people say that young heavy drinkers grow out of it, and I don't know if I won't. Most 45 year olds don't get drunk on a regular basis, but (at least in my area) people my age do. I don't know if I'm just an average kid, or if I'm being oblivious to a problem. It's kinda hard to draw the line, you know?

jane_668

I think that only you can answer your question. But if you are questioning if you are an alcoholic or not then it means something is wrong. It is bothering you.

If you are an alcoholic then there's nothing much you can do but accept your addiction. If you are not an alcoholic then definately limiting the amounts you drink is a good idea before it is too late. For me, it is not how much I drank as much as what happens when I drink? When I drink bad things happen. At the end I reached a point where I wasnot ready the price I have to pay for having that drink. The consequences were too much to bear. This is a progressive disease where once you drink things will start getting worse and worse till you either quit or lose everything you have. It is your choice and no one can tell you what to do. We can only be here if you need our support.

LeeK

So basically, if you're asking if you are an alcoholic, you probably are?

MelindaFlowers

Hi Leek,

I had my first drink at 19. I'm 28 now. If you love the feeling of being drunk now your love for it may continue to grow, especially when you can have a ball with your friends on your 21st birthday and beyond. There's that commercial that says that people who drink before 15 have four times the likelihood of becoming alcoholics.

I started drinking every night and alone about five years ago. I don't think the alone part is as big of a deal as it made to be. To me it matters how much you're drinking. You're nineteen and already kicking 'em back alone.

I guess my question is this: do you drink to cope with anything? When I say cope I mean after a long day, a great day, a day off, because it's Sunday, Wednesday, because you got all A's, all F's. That's when it took a turn for the worse with me. Everything became a reason to drink. Another point when it went south for me was when I would drink after work to take away the headache from the night before.

I've read many people on here say that if you're posting here then obviously something in your mind thinks there is a problem. That is correct. Five years ago, even when I was drinking every night, not too much, but definitely every night I never in a million years would have found this site, thought about finding this site, or thought about thinking about finding this site. I didn't think anything was wrong at that point.

It's great that you are thinking about this now. It gets much more difficult to stop the longer your drinking career is. Actually it sounds like you've been drinking longer than I have.

Like the post above says that only you can know if you have a problem, try going a month without it. Not a drop. Examine how you feel during the month. If you can't make it then that's a red flag. It's true that many 19 year old binge drink often and just *poof* the party phase ends. they go on to a happy life of two glasses of wine every Friday night.

I guess to answer your question, no, 19 is not too young. I was ridiculously naive and thought the 20's were too young to have a real serious problem. Except of course those "crazies" on intervention. That's what I thought but boy I was wrong.

I've read about 21 year olds on this site with full blown morning, noon, and night dependence on alcohol.

Keep thinking about it and keep us posted.

LeeK

I get what you're saying, the "rough day? get drunk to forget," "great day? get drunk to celebrate." I'm pretty guilty of that.
Another question: Is there really any line between 'hair of the dog' and needing a drink to get going in the morning, or is it the same thing with two different names?

I know damn well I couldn't go a month. Week, maybe, I'd be pulling my hair out by the 3rd day. And the 'party phase' thing, is it tapering down, or just all of the sudden "oh i'm too old to keep doing this, time to stop all this crap, get a new hobby, and start focusing on work"?

CarolD

Same thing....different words. I used to call that first morning drink...
"Jump starting my day"
All it was to put alcohol back in my body to stop feeling sick.



When I tried to taper down ....to control the times
....it never worked for long. I missed the buss...the drunk.
Gee! why drink a toxic liquid if you get no kick?


No you are not too lyoung to be an alcoholic.
And Yes! you have red flags of danger in your posts.

Alcoholism is progressive....it will get worse...you will lose
jobs....go to jail....hurt those who love you....mess up your
future.......get ill ...have accidents.............

Please stop drinking ....your can and the life you
save will be your own.....

Welcome to our recovery community

AmericanGirl

Hi Leek,

I'm glad you're here and I think it's great that you are self-aware enough to realize that this may be a problem for you. I agree with what everyone says -- only you can really know -- but it sounds like you are thinking there is a problem.

I started drinking heavily & daily & sometimes alone around your age (I was 20). I am still friends with many of the people I knew then (ten years ago) and I must say that looking back, even though we all partied, it's fairly easy to see who of us would grow out of it and who had a problem. But hindsight is easy. So I can only speak from my experience, but here are some things that I now see in retrospect where problems: do you seek out people solely because they too like to drink a lot? Do you find yourself hanging out with people when all you have in common is a shared interest in drinking? Are you often the first person to suggest getting drunk? Do you spend money on booze even when you can't really afford it, and do you make sure there's always booze in store? I could have answered yes to all of these questions at 20, but I think a lot of my friends who were just in a party phase could not have.

Please stick around here and think about a path for recovery. I wish I could have stopped when I was younger.

sunrise1

Drew Barrymore went to rehab when she was 13... Alcohol is no respecter of age. It's true that only you can decide if you are alcoholic or not, but there are a few tests online that can help.

TheSunAlsoRises

Hey man, I was a year older than you when I first realized I had a problem. It took another year before I stopped for good. I could have saved myself a lot of suffering. But it takes what it takes to be ready to stop. If your on a forum like this that seems like a pretty clear sign. Good luck man... Keep posting

Draciack

Hi Leek. Welcome to SR

You seem to have a good head on your shoulders and like others have said, deciding whether you're an alcoholic is your choice.

I'm fairly young (22) and in RL I still get that "you're not an alcoholic if you're in college" gambit. But looking back I see a natural progression of my drinking: binging infrequently, binging frequently, daily drinking, daily blackout drinking... Most others don't have that progression and increasing dependency, even in college.

Also, over time I became more psychologically dependent on alcohol: to get me in the mood at parties, to deal with heavier emotions, to becoming a "whiskey drinker" and incorporating alcohol into my identity.

But the real point always existed: Once I had that first drink, I always wanted more.

Oh, and about that party thing: Ask yourself if you're a context drinker? I drank at parties, by myself; in the mornings, evenings, and late nights; when I was happy, sad, excited, or miserable; in bars, clubs, airplanes, empty apartments, cars. I drank.

Best of luck and glad you're here

Ronan

I could have written that when I was 19 LeeK, I'm 25 now and am almost 3 months sober. All I can say is it will get worse. I always thought I'd "grow out of it" but in fact I grew into it.

Other people will tell you you're just young etc, but I can guarantee they don't see booze the same way you do.

Recently there has been a spate of liver failure cases in Ireland/UK from guys who've been drinking from a young age and damaged their developing livers.


I might sound like a scaremonger here, but I don't mean to be. I'm just letting you know what you're in for if you continue to drink like you do.

Ralph99

The good news is that you sound smart enough to recognize some warning signs at your young age. Keep that level of concern you have. That will help you. I didn't think I had any issues with alcohol when I was in my twenties, but I clearly did. But back then there weren't great resources like this where other people share their stories. I was young, healthy, and feeling good, and I saw everyone else my age doing what I was doing. But it takes its toll on your body over the years if you do it for too long. You won't look or feel too good at 30 if you keep up what you are doing, even if you are not an alcoholic. And 19 is way too young--the drinking age is 21. I know I didn't drink heavily until I was legal. It was too hard to get with my lousy fake ID!

Jfanagle

My 30 year old son just celebrated his 10TH year of sobriety. Do the math; it is of course possible to have a "problem" before you are of "legal age."

He was afraid that he was skipping class at the University too often due to a hangover. He was drinking alone and when he did drink with his buddies he started before the party, and continued after the others had quit. He began to "need alcohol" to insure a good time for himself. He began to start drinking earlier and earlier in the day. When he realized that he was "needing" a drink to get going due to too much the night before he got scared and went to his Mother to talk with her about his "possible problem" and she suggested that since his Dad (me) is a recovered alcoholic that perhaps I could help.

I gave him a schedule of AA meeting in my area and told him to go until he WANTED to go to the meetings and then he could stop. As I said that was 10 years ago and he still goes and now has a great family, home and a very comfortable career that I doubt he would have if he thought he was "too young" to have a problem at 20 years old.
I have no idea if you are an alcoholic, but I know my son thinks he is.

Good luck,

Jon

Wilde10

Jfanagle,
I cannot express in words my admiration for the kind of relationship you built with your son to make him go to you and your wife first when he thought he had a problem.

sable1

Shakes in the morning doesn't sound like a good sign.
For myself, I just know that it startet a bit like that, then the symptoms got worse and worse for the next few years. I'm 23 now but I allready have healthissues because of drinking that means I can probably never drink again safely.

Had I realised what road I was heading down when I was 19, I would have stopped drinking earlier, before I crossed the line and went to far.

I definitly think that you can be dependent on alcohol at the age of 19.

Taking5

Actually the younger you start drinking - and 9 is very young - the better the chances are that you will become an alcoholic.

Focus Adolescent Services: Alcohol and Teen Drinking

I don't know if there drinking at a young age causes alcoholism, but you are in this group regardless.

You are obviously very bright and realize you have a problem. So what are you going to do about it?

LeeK

That sounds VERY familiar.

And yea, I don't want liver failure or any similar issue in my 20s and 30s, or ever, I appreciate the blunt truth. Textbook signs and opinions from you kind folks are definitely pointing to a problem. I'm not sure if I just wanted a second opinion or if I was too ignorant to see it, or neither. But yea, like many of you said, it certainly seems like a problem to me.

Andthe 'hair of the dog' for the morning after is basically a sign of withdrawal? Damn. I've been doing that since I was 15, and it helps a hangover, or withdrawal, or whatever combination that makes me feel like absolute **** in the morning after getting wasted. I always thought it was just a runofthemill hangover cure.

Taking5

Leek,

Actually a hangover IS a mild form of withdrawal. That is why drinking makes it better - you stop withdrawing as you have more alcohol in your system.

Trust me, you do not want to go beyond a hangover and into acute withdrawal. It is no fun.