Reality defeats fear
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Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Indianapolis
Posts: 161
Reality defeats fear
Hey all. Today is day 13. I had been drinking pretty heavy before getting involved in AA again. For the past few months I have had a tingling in my abdomen. I am kind of a hypocondriac, so I immediately thought I had liver issues due to drinking. So, what did I do about it? Drank a lot so I wouldn't have to think about. Isn't that brilliant??? A person thinks they may have liver problems, so they decide to drink so much that they forget about the imaginary problem that liquor would only make worse if said problem were real... Two years ago I had a liver test done and my number was 110 (Whatever that means - apparently normal is 25 - 75).
Anyway, in sobriety I've been doing all I can to be real / honest with myself. So, I went to get a liver test just to see how bad it is. I figure I would have the problem wether I knew or didn't know, so why not find out so I could take action should it be needed.
I got the results back today 73!!! So normal! All of that worry, obessing, bad feelings, etc... over nothing. Now, that doesn't mean I'm gonna celebrate my healthy liver with some drinks, but it does tell me I'm OK. Nothing to worry about for today. It's funny how much I used to worry about my liver and how scared I was to get it checked.
Going to a meeting later. Good luck all!
Anyway, in sobriety I've been doing all I can to be real / honest with myself. So, I went to get a liver test just to see how bad it is. I figure I would have the problem wether I knew or didn't know, so why not find out so I could take action should it be needed.
I got the results back today 73!!! So normal! All of that worry, obessing, bad feelings, etc... over nothing. Now, that doesn't mean I'm gonna celebrate my healthy liver with some drinks, but it does tell me I'm OK. Nothing to worry about for today. It's funny how much I used to worry about my liver and how scared I was to get it checked.
Going to a meeting later. Good luck all!
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Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Scottsdale, AZ, one big happy dysfunctional family!
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Thankfully I never did any damage to my liver, I had it checked a couple times, doc told me to stop drinking and I'd abstain for a few days until the pain went away, then I'd pick up again. I guess that was another "yet". Sometimes I wonder how much longer I would've had to drink until I suffered more serious consequences.
But for the grace of God.....
But for the grace of God.....
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Join Date: Sep 2009
Posts: 200
Originally Posted by Clutch B 
I worry alot about "nothing" too 
Guilt, fear of the unknown, hyperbole and histrionics.
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Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Chagrin Falls, Ohio
Posts: 35
Glad you are doing well health-wise. My doc was hammering me for years about my drinking and my elevated liver enzymes. I ignored him because I was an idiot, to say it simply. Even a required ultrasound on my liver failed to slow me down. Now that I've been clean for a bit, I look forward to getting healthy again. I know my liver is much happier with me, too 
not little, a stranger no more
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: in the crowd
Posts: 410
Bavo that you decided to get your health checked, and I'm very glad for you that your liver is ok! Feels good to have certainty not to have to worry about it anymore, eh?
I can relate to the fear of going to the dr, being attentive and fearful about every little signal from the body....Well my reasoning was: oh I'll get it checked once I have been able to quit for a while. Yeah, reasoning of an alcoholic...Sigh...of course that took quite some time, and I could have spared myself from a lot of fear/internal suffering by just getting my a** to the dr.
When I finally went, after being sober for a few weeks, it turned out that my liver was fine (that was pure luck, I was a pretty bad binge drinker). After a few additional tests it turned out symptoms were the result of a rather benign food intolerance that could be tackled by changing my diet.
On hindsight, I can only say to those who are afraid to go and see their dr. Just go, chances are it's not gonna be that bad, you will spare yourself a lot of anguish, and be honest so that you can get exactly the medical support you need. And the human body is pretty good at healing once you give it a chance.
I can relate to the fear of going to the dr, being attentive and fearful about every little signal from the body....Well my reasoning was: oh I'll get it checked once I have been able to quit for a while. Yeah, reasoning of an alcoholic...Sigh...of course that took quite some time, and I could have spared myself from a lot of fear/internal suffering by just getting my a** to the dr.
When I finally went, after being sober for a few weeks, it turned out that my liver was fine (that was pure luck, I was a pretty bad binge drinker). After a few additional tests it turned out symptoms were the result of a rather benign food intolerance that could be tackled by changing my diet.
On hindsight, I can only say to those who are afraid to go and see their dr. Just go, chances are it's not gonna be that bad, you will spare yourself a lot of anguish, and be honest so that you can get exactly the medical support you need. And the human body is pretty good at healing once you give it a chance.
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Join Date: Jan 2010
Posts: 118
Happy you are here and happy that your liver is here as well.
This is important. You cited a situation where False Evidence Appeared Real.
Many times in sobriety I have fallen into that FEAR trap and gave myself a great deal of anxiety.
Could be a cause for a drink or as in your case you Faced Everything And Recover. Known as FEAR Now you live another sober day and tell about it.
This is important. You cited a situation where False Evidence Appeared Real.
Many times in sobriety I have fallen into that FEAR trap and gave myself a great deal of anxiety.
Could be a cause for a drink or as in your case you Faced Everything And Recover. Known as FEAR Now you live another sober day and tell about it.
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