I did the impossible!!
DOS: 11/6/10
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Florida Panhandle, USA
Posts: 736
I did the impossible!!
I just spent a week in Key West as part of a convention that is known partially for the drinking potential, not to mention that KW tends to be a drinking town anyway. I was totally not sure I could do it... my mentor was there and he is just an amazing presence. I wanted to get to a meeting with him but our schedule was utterly packed. He's an early riser and was going to the 7am meetings which considering our bookings was not an option for us.
There were only a few tough moments, and on the last night we met some friends at a bar for a final goodbye; everyone else was drinking but I was really fine and happy with my diet coke. I had a blast talking and laughing and didn't think much about drinking at all.
Our CD sales were through the roof, and other merch did well too. On top of that- - no bar bill!!! LOL. It occurred to me that that probably has been a decent chunk of change in past years. Not having that expense makes this trip even more successful.
One thing that didn't change to my dismay is that on Sunday after the week was over I felt exactly like I did last year- - like someone came into the bedroom while I was sleeping and beat me up with a Louisville Slugger. In past years, I always attributed this to the several hangovers and the constant drinking. Now I know that I beat myself up wrongly and piled on extra guilt, when it was really just the stress and exhaustion of being "on" 24/7 for over a week. That doesn't mean the lesson I took away is that "well, I might as well drink anyway"... but that my paranoia and my alcoholism caused yet another problem with myself that was needless.
We have been a part of this event every year for more than 10 years, and this was by far the best. It's the only one I didn't drink at. I'm sure that's not a coincidence. Husband and I worked together better than we ever have and enjoyed each other's company the entire time. Also not a coincidence. He doesn't have to worry about me, onstage or off... and that is a huge weight lifted off both of us.
I'm really proud of myself. I know it wasn't just me... it was God's help... my husband's help and understanding... the presence of my great friend with a billion (seems!) years of sobriety under his belt... and checking in with all of you here as well. I didn't have much time to write or respond to blogs, but this site is very grounding for me and a great place to check in on a daily basis.
We are energized and headed right back into the studio for the next project. Not only were our sales a great financial boost but we are really jazzed to see what we come up with when we're not on such a tight schedule. We have enough regional work through the winter to make it, and will leave us more time in town to work in the studio. Things are really looking up right now and I can only be grateful and hold up my end of the bargain by working hard, attending more meetings, and get on to working the steps.
There were only a few tough moments, and on the last night we met some friends at a bar for a final goodbye; everyone else was drinking but I was really fine and happy with my diet coke. I had a blast talking and laughing and didn't think much about drinking at all.
Our CD sales were through the roof, and other merch did well too. On top of that- - no bar bill!!! LOL. It occurred to me that that probably has been a decent chunk of change in past years. Not having that expense makes this trip even more successful.
One thing that didn't change to my dismay is that on Sunday after the week was over I felt exactly like I did last year- - like someone came into the bedroom while I was sleeping and beat me up with a Louisville Slugger. In past years, I always attributed this to the several hangovers and the constant drinking. Now I know that I beat myself up wrongly and piled on extra guilt, when it was really just the stress and exhaustion of being "on" 24/7 for over a week. That doesn't mean the lesson I took away is that "well, I might as well drink anyway"... but that my paranoia and my alcoholism caused yet another problem with myself that was needless.
We have been a part of this event every year for more than 10 years, and this was by far the best. It's the only one I didn't drink at. I'm sure that's not a coincidence. Husband and I worked together better than we ever have and enjoyed each other's company the entire time. Also not a coincidence. He doesn't have to worry about me, onstage or off... and that is a huge weight lifted off both of us.
I'm really proud of myself. I know it wasn't just me... it was God's help... my husband's help and understanding... the presence of my great friend with a billion (seems!) years of sobriety under his belt... and checking in with all of you here as well. I didn't have much time to write or respond to blogs, but this site is very grounding for me and a great place to check in on a daily basis.
We are energized and headed right back into the studio for the next project. Not only were our sales a great financial boost but we are really jazzed to see what we come up with when we're not on such a tight schedule. We have enough regional work through the winter to make it, and will leave us more time in town to work in the studio. Things are really looking up right now and I can only be grateful and hold up my end of the bargain by working hard, attending more meetings, and get on to working the steps.
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